


Ten Years After The Fall

by OurImpavidHeroine



Series: The Restoration of the Northern Air Temple or: How Ikki Became the Leader She Was Always Meant to Be [1]
Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Multi, Post-Canon, Post-Series, Vignette
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-12
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-03-21 16:44:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 61,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3699647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OurImpavidHeroine/pseuds/OurImpavidHeroine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of little one-off stories about various characters, set ten years after the finale of The Legend of Korra.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Still Hear The Echo: Ikki

**Author's Note:**

> For those of you who follow my other stories, these are all set around the same timeframe as Chapter 5 in "Bouncing off Clouds" and about a year before Chapter 6. I'm not sure how many of these I am going to do. I'll write them as they come to me, I suppose! Ikki came to me in the wee hours of the morning and smacked me awake; I figured I had better write her down before she took over my brain and distracted me too much.
> 
> Set in the same world as the rest of my stories; it's not a requirement to read them but since they are post-series and post-canon you can expect to find a few things here that follow my series.

184 AG, Northern Air Temple  
Ikki

 

In Ikki's experience it was always easier to ask forgiveness than get permission. Unlike her brother Meelo, Ikki had also realized that the best thing of all was to simply not get caught.

It was only a few weeks after Korra had opened the spirit portal after the fall of Republic City that Ikki decided that she was going to go and see the Tree of Time. She'd asked Korra where it was and how to get there - she'd always asked a lot of questions, so Korra simply answered her without thinking anything of it, which is exactly what Ikki had been counting on. She prepared a small bag with food and such and changed out of her wingsuit into comfortable clothes and sturdy boots. She knew she wouldn't be able to bend there. Ikki asked a lot of questions, but Ikki also listened. She paid attention. She hoarded information away in her head the way her little sugar glider hoarded berries.

She left in the middle of the night, taking one of the small sailboats that the Air Acolytes used to get around the island. She was by no means an accomplished sailor but Uncle Bumi had shown them all the basics and once she got the sail up it only took a little wind to get it across the bay. She landed, secured the boat and made her way through the darkness to the light of the portal. Daw and Min-ji were there guarding the entrance, but it was simple to distract them and get past. Once she was in the Spirit World she remembered what Korra had told her and she found herself right next to the Tree. She was a little disappointed, actually. She thought it might be a challenge. It wasn't. It was simple to do. She simply knew where she needed to be and she stood still and let the Spirit World move past her until she was there. Piece of cake.

Korra had told her that the Tree carried every memory in the history of the world. She meant memories of the past, of course, but Ikki knew better. Memories could go both ways. Time moved in strange ways for Ikki sometimes. Sometimes she saw things in her dreams that came true later. Sometimes she knew things that were going to happen before they happened. She once tried to talk to her father about it but he wasn't really listening to her. He so rarely had time for his children now that the new airbenders were around. Not that Ikki was judging him - she got it, she did, but nevertheless, her father was a busy man nowadays. She told Jinora, though. Jinora believed her, even though Jinora hadn't ever experienced what Ikki did. But that was Jinora for you. Jinora always listened.

She put her hand to the Tree and fragments of her past surged towards her. _The first time she flew; the first time she saw Rohan, the smile on her grandmother's face, the feel of that swamp where they found Korra, the swamp that called to her and had invited her in._

But the past was not what she wanted. She wanted the future. She closed her eyes, and moved forward.

 _A fully grown air bison, flying, looking for her. Blueberry Spicehead, she realized with a start, whom she hadn't seen since she was very small calf. Her father, old and tired, sitting next to a bed, Uncle Bumi laying in the bed pale and silent and Ikki knew he was dying and the grief tore at her. Jinora, middle-aged, smiling at a group of small children dressed in airbender robes, telling them some sort of story. Korra, hair gray, face seamed, walking through the Spirit World. Her own bare arms, tattooed with familiar blue, her wrists covered in some sort of silver bracelets, delicate cuffs entwined with spirit animals. Meelo's face, older and furious, shouting, air spiraling out from his upraised hands._ That one made her afraid. _Rohan, in his late teens, perhaps, standing there on the Island, watching across the bay to the City beyond. A hall of black rock, sculpted and beautiful, with airbender sigils carved into the walls. She felt oddly at home there, felt it in her bones breath flesh, felt it in the cold that surrounded her and then out of a wall of that same black rock, a wall that melted and flowed, he came, Huan Beifong, older, his hair long and all black, tied back, he looked her straight in the eyes and said_ Do you hear me call?  _and Ikki snatched her hand back from the Tree, her chest heaving._

When she got back from the Tree of Time - slipping easily out of the portal and sailing the boat back before anyone had even noticed she was gone - she told Jinora that she needed to go to the Southern Air Temple to fetch her air bison. Jinora stared at her for a long time and then said she'd take her if they got permission. Oh, sometimes she and Jinora squabbled, but in the end, Jinora was her best friend as well as her sister. Jinora always had her back. Her father argued - there were air bison calves available, one simply was not chosen by an adult wild bison, it wasn't how it worked - and Ikki stomped off to her room in frustration. It wasn't that she couldn't make her way down there on her own, but Jinora would never sneak out and it would mean she'd have to take Oogi in the middle of the night and go alone and then bring back both Oogi and Blueberry, which would be a serious pain in the butt. Not to mention she really did want Jinora and Pepper along.

Her mother came to her that night and asked her a question. "Ikki, do you sometimes see things or dream things that come true?"

Ikki wasn't sure how to answer. She did, of course, but she had never spoken of it to anyone except for Jinora.

"My mother and her mother did the same," her mother confided in her. "Sometimes I do as well. Your father doesn't put much stock in that kind of thing, but I've never been wrong, and neither was Grandma or Great-Grandma." Ikki just nodded. "Okay, then," her mother said and she kissed Ikki and left the room.

The next morning at breakfast her mother announced that Ikki and Jinora would be leaving the next day for the Southern Air Temple. Her father tried to argue, but her mother was firm. Her mother knew very well how to get around her father when she put her mind to it.

(Ikki paid attention to how that worked as well.)

Blueberry was there waiting, just like Ikki had Seen. As soon as she saw Ikki she practically pounced on her. Ikki rode her all the way home, bareback and with the reins that she'd brought with her. She knew she'd be going home with her.

(She was aware that it wasn't the proper way to go about bonding with an air bison, but then again Ikki had never given much of a damn about the proper way of anything.)

********************

It was about a year after that when Huan gave her the bracelets at Wu's coronation. He told her later that he had only intended them as an apology; a very elaborate overkill of a gift to make up for the fact that he had refused to move his feet on the dance floor at Varrick and Zhu Li's wedding. Huan simply had no sense for that kind of thing, most polite conventions of what was or was not appropriate flew right past him. He didn't really do gradients of any kind. The bracelets were never meant as a promise.

Didn't matter to twelve-year-old Ikki; she knew what she had Seen at the Tree. As she grew older Ikki would learn that she couldn't make any assumptions about the things that she'd See in her dreams about the future - things were often not as simple as they appeared. But she was still young enough then to conclude that since she'd Seen Huan in the future and he gave her the bracelets that they'd be getting married someday. She was willing to wait. It was just a matter of time.

(Nobody thought that Ikki was capable of waiting, not even Jinora. She was, though. She was.)

Life went on at the Island. Kai got closer and closer to Mastery. Kai was a brilliant airbender, a true natural. It probably didn't hurt that Jinora was sneaking out in the middle of the night to meet him out past the dormitories. Of course Ikki knew. Her bedroom was right next to Jinora's. Ikki wasn't going to say a word, though. She liked Kai, for one thing, and for another, it was quite possibly the first time Jinora had ever broken the rules for any reason. Ikki figured Jinora would benefit from breaking the rules. The one night Ikki accidently caught Jinora sneaking back in she merely nodded when her sister told her she had been out meditating. As if Jinora meditating at 3:00 am somehow included getting grass in her hair and having her wingsuit improperly fastened up.

Ikki herself had never really enjoyed meditating. Oh, she gave the outward appearance of it, but in her mind she was doing things instead of just being one with the Universe. That was how she taught herself to count all of the trees on the Island by sensing how the airflow changed around them. It was also how, after she actually visited the Tree of Time, she taught herself how to project herself into the Spirit World and move around.

She didn't tell anybody she could do it. Well, not at that point. She would eventually, she was sure her father would want to know that she could do it and Jinora would probably want to compare notes as to how both of them accomplished it. She didn't begrudge her father or her sister anything that she had figured out on her own but she just wanted to keep these things to herself a little longer.

_She dreamed more than once of the great black hall she'd seen in the vision at the Tree of Time. It felt sad to her. Abandoned. There were never any other people, it sat empty. Beautiful but empty. More than once she'd wake up with tears in her eyes, channeling the desolation she'd felt in her dreams._

Meelo got louder and louder in his demands for his tattoos. Ikki didn't demand her own. She had seen what kind of responsibility had been dumped on Jinora as soon as she got hers and Ikki wasn't in any kind of hurry for that. She was happy to help out the other airbenders, though, and if Kai and her Uncle Bumi guessed that Ikki was closer to mastery than her father realized they kept it to themselves.

It was right after her fourteenth birthday that she decided to see if she could visit Huan. Oh, not visit him like go to Zaofu; she knew better than to even ask. Twelve-year-old Ikki had not kept her cool about Huan at the coronation and her mother was on to her. She knew she could astral project herself there, distance wasn't an issue when you were doing that, she'd just simply focus on him and find him. She was a little concerned, however; she imagined that he might be a little startled to suddenly have a floating blue Ikki in his room. Especially if he was doing something private.

She was thinking it through while projecting herself into the Spirit World. She often did that; she enjoyed it there and had one particular grove full of pink trees and rainbow flowers that she'd created for herself the first time she'd projected herself there. According to Jinora and Korra the Spirit World had a mind of its own and changed depending on how you were feeling. Well, Ikki felt like having her own space there, and so she simply expected it to be there when she came and it always was. She wasn't sure if that was how it officially worked, but again, Ikki had never really cared all that much for what was officially sanctioned. She was sitting in her grove and thinking about visiting Huan when she sensed him. Sensed him in the real world from inside the Spirit World. Curious, she went to find him. He was sleeping, she could sense, so she just reached in and brought him back with her into the Spirit World. 

Huan was more than a little surprised. _Hello, Ikki_ , he said, and looked around. _Am I dreaming?_ He looked real. He was wearing a pair of loose sleeping trousers and nothing else. His feet were bare and his hair stuck up in several different directions.

 _I'm not really sure,_ she said, _but I can tell you that you are in the Spirit World._

 _In a dream?_ he asked again. He reached out and ran his fingers down one of her pink trees, leaning closer to study it.

 _I think I brought you here,_ she said.

 _How?_ he asked, cocking his head at her.

 _I don't really know,_ she said. _I wanted to see you and it just sort of happened. I can come here on my own, airbender meditation thing. But I didn't know I could bring anyone with me._

 _Okay,_ he said. He leaned forward to touch her arm but she felt nothing. _I can't feel you,_ he said, and she reached out to touch him as well. She could see her fingers touching his arms, but she felt nothing. He sat down, cross-legged in the field of rainbow flowers. _I could paint this,_ he said slowly, and he was quiet for a time. She sat down as well, and watched him, waiting. Suddenly, he cocked his head again. _There's a sound outside my room. I'm waking up now._

He disappeared.

A few weeks later, Mako and his family came to the island for dinner. When her parents were distracted, Wu slipped her a small tube, carefully wrapped. "Special delivery," he said quietly and put his finger to his lips. She discreetly stowed it in her room and went back into the dining room before she was missed. Later that night she opened it. It was a small and beautifully painted watercolor of her grove, unsigned. She hung it up on the wall and when her mother noticed it she said that she bought it from a street artist downtown. It wasn't that she liked lying to her mother, but. But. As it was she'd had a showdown with her father over wearing her bracelets over her wingsuit. He still grimaced at them whenever he saw them. She might still be fighting him over them if Jinora hadn't taken her side.

She didn't visit Huan on a regular basis or anything. She didn't like projecting into the Spirit World during the day. Generally speaking if she was meditating (or at least giving the appearance of meditating) on the Island, at least, she'd be left alone. That being said, she preferred going at night. Huan had to be sleeping for her to pull him in with her and he seemed to keep odd hours. Sometimes he'd be working into the wee hours of the night, sleeping most of the next day. Sometimes he didn't want to go and would be irritable with her for dragging him along anyhow. She learned to touch him with her mind and await permission.

(Her family benefitted as well from this newfound patience and discretion on her part; however, only her mother and Jinora actively noticed it.)

The nights that Huan came with her they'd talk. He'd talk about his art, she'd talk about life on the Island. Neither one of them talked much about world events; neither one of them cared all that much about presidential elections or the war brewing in the southeastern part of the world, something that concerned her father and Jinora a great deal.

She talked about how much she wanted to travel and see the world. He told her that he didn't care much for travel; too much change, too much uncertainty, too many surprises. She loved surprises; she loved being uncertain and throwing herself into new things. Huan shied away from all of that. _I guess I'm just boring,_ he said one night, but Ikki couldn't agree.

 _I've seen your art,_ she said. _How can you call yourself boring? You see all of the little things that everyone else - including me, might I add - miss._ She held up her bracelets. _You made these before I even brought you here, these were from your imagination. How can you call yourself boring? It's like you have an entire world in your mind to retreat to. I wish I had that._

He was silent for a long time. _I wish I could be free the way that you can. But I can only be that way inside my head. Outside my head, there's too much noise and light and things always going bang bang bang for my eyes and ears._ He struggled for the words, fingers fluttering the way they did when he couldn't connect the images in his mind to the words coming out of his mouth. Ikki was familiar with that now, and she waited. _I want to be free. But when there's too much I can't find it around the things that hurt and bite._

He looked at her, a mute appeal for understanding.

She nodded, slowly. _So you like to have things on the outside be the same so that you don't get lost on the inside?_

He surprised her with the glassy sheen of tears in his eyes. _Yes! Yes, like that. Like those words! Yes!_

 _Okay,_ she said. _I think I understand._

 _Wing knows,_ he said. _And Opal and Wu, too. Do you know?_ He put his hands to either side of his head.

 _I know,_ she said, and he stared at her, straight into her eyes, throwing her off a bit with the intensity of his gaze.

 _I could travel with Wu because he knows. He made all the outside things go and happen. I didn't have to stay outside if I needed to go inside._ He grimaced, and broke eye contact. _The words aren't marching in straight lines now._

 _They don't need to,_ Ikki replied. _March in straight lines, I mean. You mean that it's not travel that you hate, it's having to think about the travel, the parts with tickets and where dinner is coming from and where you will be sleeping. You mean that if it gets to be too much for you that you need to go back inside your head until you can bear it and you need someone else to take care of things and take care of you until you can come back out again._

 _Yes_ , he said. _Yes._ Suddenly, he smiled at her. _Ikki knows._

 _Ikki is an airbender,_ she said, returning his smile. _We understand the whole being inside your own head part. So tell me. If I could do that, if I could take care of things and take care of you when you needed to go back inside, would you like to travel with me?_

He thought about this for a moment. _Yes._

 _I have to get my tattoos first,_ she said. _It's important to me._

He nodded. _Yes. I understand._

 _Then,_ she said. _How about then? You and me and Blueberry. I'll make sure we have what we need. I promise. You can go inside as much as you need to._

 _Okay,_ he said. _Does Blueberry smell as bad as Juicy?_

Ikki threw her head back and laughed. _Nobody smells as bad as poor old snotty Juicy._

 *******************

At that point she applied herself. She sat down with her father and Jinora and showed them how she was able to sense airflow and use it to enhance her other senses. In many ways it was parallel to how Huan used his seismic sense; different methodology but similar applications. 

(They had talked over how it worked for both of them throughout many nighttime meetings.)

She demonstrated that she was able to spiritbend. Jinora was giving her some serious side-eye, but she said nothing. Spirits bless Jinora.

She quickly finished her thirty-six tines of mastery; her father was surprised at this but Jinora cornered her and accused her of holding out on them. Well, she _had_ been holding out on them. She knew her tattoos were within her reach; unlike Meelo she wasn't demanding them. Mostly because she knew that the moment she had the tattoos that she would be leaving, and she loved her family. She didn't want to hurt them by going, even though she had to go. She had to. She couldn't spend the rest of her life on that Island, waiting for new airbenders to be born, waiting for her father to tell her where to go and what to do. She was a nomad, through and through, even if the Air Nomads' place in the world was changing drastically. 

Her tattoos took some time to finish and she showed Huan their progress whenever they'd meet in the Spirit World. She actually surprised a laugh out of him the night she showed up bald, the spinal tattoo just starting up her neck. One night soon after that he showed her a tattoo on his left forearm; a very familiar drawing of a young dragon bird spirit, inked in vivid purples and pinks and a particularly lurid yellow. He told her he'd read up on how tattoos were done and asked Zaofu's chef to show him the basics. 

 _Wait, is that from my drawing?_ she asked. _My self-portrait?_

 _Of course,_ he replied.

 _But you sent those paintings to Meelo and me years ago! They're hanging up here in my parents' house. How did you remember what it looked like?_ She leaned closer to examine it.

He tapped his head. _Pictures stay in my head,_ he replied. _Once they are here they are here to stay._

 _I didn't know you liked dragon bird spirits that much,_ she said.

He just smiled.

Her tattoos were complete two months before her eighteenth birthday. The ceremony welcoming her into mastery was held at Air Temple Island; Huan came up from Zaofu with his parents as well his brother Wing and his wife Nuo and their little girls. Her Aunt Kya even made it up from the south, which pleased Ikki to no end. She missed her aunt. At one point after the ceremony Kya went to hug Su Beifong and meet her grandchildren. She briefly spoke to Huan, but Ikki wasn't near enough to overhear the conversation. Later that evening, her aunt approached her alone, putting her arms around Ikki.

"When you leave here, please come down and see me," she said.

Ikki drew back to stare at her, startled. Kya smiled.

"It's in your aura," she said. She glanced over at Huan, standing alone in a far corner. "His too. Bring him along as well. Don't forget a hat; your bald little head will get cold down there." Her aunt kissed her on both cheeks - it shocked Ikki to realize that she was as tall as Kya now, perhaps even a little taller - and then made her way over to Lin Beifong to chat.

Ikki quietly put her affairs into order and wrote a letter to Rohan explaining where she was going and promising to send him further letters as she traveled. She knew Jinora would already understand why she went and sincerely doubted whether Meelo would care or not. She also wrote a letter to her parents. The morning of her eighteenth birthday she took up a small bag with a very few necessities and saddled up Blueberry before dawn. She knew she'd be back, eventually, but she shed more than a few tears at the idea of leaving.

Huan was waiting for her in a field outside of Zaofu's city limits, as agreed. He had a tendency to get airsick but they weren't in a hurry; if it got to be too much they just landed Blue and let him put his feet on the ground for awhile. Mostly he went barefoot when he was riding up on Blueberry anyhow.

They traveled around the southern part of the former Earth Kingdom, stopping for a couple of months to explore the southern islands. Midwinter was upon them before they bought proper gear for Huan and made their way down to her aunt's house. Huan could not stop going outside to plunge himself into the snow; he'd never seen it before. Finally Kya dragged him back inside before he was frostbitten. He spent the next three days barely eating or sleeping, trying to replicate individual snowflakes in tiny slivers of silver. He snapped at Ikki when she tried to interrupt him to tell him dinner was ready.

"Leave it, Ikki," her aunt said. "Let him get it out of his system."

It was the morning of the fourth day and Ikki was sitting at Kya's kitchen table. At some point during the night Huan had fallen asleep on his bed; Kya had covered him with a blanket and let him be. He was still sleeping.

"He should eat, though," Ikki said, frowning.

"Well, I guess the two of you will just need to work out a system where you can make sure he's eating and he can continue to focus on his work. Communication is the key but I can promise you that trying to figure it out when he's working won't end well. Best to wait until his mind is clear, if you don't mind the unasked for advice," her aunt replied. She poured hot water over the tea leaves. "So I assume your mother discussed birth control with you?"

Ikki felt her face heat up and crossed her arms over her chest defensively. "Uh. We don't do that. I mean, none of it. I don't...I don't think he's interested in that."

Kya stirred dried fruit into the porridge on the stove. "Why don't you think he's interested?"

"I don't...he's never...I mean, he's never talked about it or anything, he's never tried anything with me. Nothing at all. Ever. We sleep separately and everything."

Kya tasted the porridge and then added some sugar. "There are some people that simply aren't interested in sex, perhaps he's like that as well."

"Maybe," said Ikki.

"Hmmmm," said Kya, and she dished Ikki up some breakfast. "Listen, I don't know how much your parents have talked to you about sex. I just hope you know that it's okay to give your body pleasure, that you don't need to be committed to someone or even in love to do that." She held up a finger. "Not that I am saying a committed relationship between two people in love is a bad thing! It isn't. Your parents are a very good example of that. However, I am saying that not everyone is built that way. Your grandmother - and your grandfather, too, when he was still alive - worried a great deal over me and the fact that I hadn't settled down, so to speak. But it wasn't who I was. Who I _am_. I've had many lovers over the course of my life and I've learned something from each of them." Kya laughed. "The lessons weren't always good, sorry to say. But even still, I have no regrets at all about how I've lived my life. You shouldn't either, Ikki. If your Huan in there is not interested in you then there's no reason why you can't be sexually active and enjoy yourself with other people. Don't cut yourself off from living and enjoying all aspects of your life because of a choice someone else is making. Do you follow what I'm saying?"

Ikki thought about this while she drank her tea. She scratched her head. Her growing in hair itched constantly, it drove her crazy. "I do understand what you are saying, Aunt Kya."

"Just promise me one thing, Ikki. If and when you choose to have sex with someone, do it because your body wants to engage in that pleasure. Don't ever do it in order to hurt or punish or get a reaction from someone else - and that includes Huan. That also includes yourself, by the way."  

"It's all so confusing sometimes," Ikki said, with a frustrated little laugh. 

"Well, when the time is right you'll figure it out." Kya smiled at her over her tea. "You've got plenty of time, Ikki. Figure out who you are. Eventually I think it will resolve itself, however that may manifest." She raised up that finger again. "But you do know about birth control, right? Because I'm a healer. I can set you up for that."

 _That night Ikki dreamed once again of the hall of black glass and stone. It was far more detailed than her previous dreams. She could hear the faint sound of wind chimes; the air was cool and clean. The smell reminded of her of something, but she couldn't quite grasp it. The ceiling arched high above her, but for all its size and darkness the hall was neither heavy nor gloomy. It was simple - not a lot of extra flourishes or unnecessary decorative elements - and it gave a sense of grace and beauty. She felt as if the walls were breathing; whispering something she couldn't quite catch. She wasn't afraid of it, though - instead she felt a desperate longing to find this place, to go there in person, to move herself through time and space to get there the way she'd moved in the Spirit World. She walked along the subtle spiral patterns set into the floor until she came to a fountain inside of the hall, water gushing from somewhere inside the walls. Natural stones in different colors were set into it in a mosaic pattern; the swirls of the airbenders, the flames of the firebenders, the waves of the waterbenders, the solid lines of the earthbenders. Entwined around all four signs was an adult dragon bird spirit, all yellows and reds. It was beautiful. She reached her hand out to touch it, and woke up._  

They stayed with Kya through the winter before moving out again. Huan and Ikki learned to ski (it took Huan some time to get it, he couldn't manage to get his arms and legs to go in opposite directions very well, much to his frustration) and Ikki managed to figure out ice skating. Before they left Huan gave Kya all but one of the tiny silver snowflakes he'd crafted in those first few days, set into a comb for her hair. Kya was delighted. 

He saved the final silver snowflake for Ikki. She had him fashion it into a tiny stud and got the top of her ear pierced with it.

They flew north, to the Fire Nation, Huan shedding layers of clothes as the air warmed. They visited volcanos, tried the food, and one memorable night in a small village where Huan had repaired a metal gate in exchange for food and lodging they joined the villagers under the stars next to a bonfire. As the night went on several of the villagers brought out instruments and people started to dance. Ikki was thrilled. Huan sat the dances out but she whirled in time to the music, shunting between villagers. A slow song started up - punctuated by a deep and throbbing drumbeat - and the villagers that were left around the fire started an intimate dance that involved arms and legs entwined in sinuous movements. A village woman a few years older than Ikki grabbed Huan and pulled him up off the ground before he had a chance to demur and started to teach him the dance. As per usual Huan was awkward trying to learn something new; he stumbled over himself and tried several times to sit back down. The woman teaching him was insistent, however, and eventually it clicked and he fell into the natural rhythm of the dance. Ikki had danced with half the village at that point - as per usual she had learned the movements almost instantly and was confident enough to soon add some embellishments of her own. She was being spun around in circles and thinking that if they were going to spending any more time in the Fire Nation she had to see about getting a change of clothes (her wingsuit was too hot for the climate) when she suddenly noticed that the woman who had been teaching Huan had pulled him very close. Too close. Ikki felt a sudden flare of jealousy, a feeling so strange to her that she couldn't identify it at first. The woman whispered something into Huan's ear and pulled out the long silver hairsticks he'd used to catch his hair up into a quick bun. Huan's hair tumbled down to his waist and as he reached a surprised hand back to grab at it the woman pulled him flush to her chest.

Ikki was having absolutely none of that. 

She easily spun away from her partner, moving across the impromptu dance floor to bring up a small wind. The village woman threw her hands up in confusion at the breeze that shoved her sideways; Ikki neatly took the hairsticks out of her hand and grabbed Huan's hand. "Cutting in," she said with acidic sweetness, and moved him away.

Huan looked down at her. "I was dancing," he said.

"You're still dancing," she replied tartly.

"Ah," he said.

"I'm not a child any longer," she said. "In case you hadn't noticed."

"I noticed," he said and he took the hairsticks out of her hand and put them in his pocket, followed by his hands. "I don't feel like dancing any more," he said as he walked away.

Ikki went back to the dancing. The next morning neither of them said anything about it. Ikki remembered what her aunt had said and resolved that no matter what Huan chose she would not let it define her or her own choices. 

They traveled on. A few villages later a handsome young firebender that had been giving her the eye all day caught up to her as she went for a walk in the evening and offered to take her back to his room. She wasn't sure, but he kissed her and her body instantly responded and she realized that she wanted him. Wanted _it_. She followed him back home. It was her first time and it wasn't earth shattering or anything but she wasn't sorry, either. She had no regrets.

She caught up with Huan the next day and started to fumble out an excuse as to why she hadn't made it home the night before, but he stopped her.

"You're an adult woman," he said. "I don't own you. You don't owe me an explanation of how you spend your time."

She was afraid that things would change between them, despite his words. They didn't. 

_******************_

Huan got his entire back covered with a traditional tattoo of a lion turtle by an old Firebender shaman; it took several months. Ikki stayed with him for some of the time but then she traveled with Blueberry to the Western Air Temple and stayed there for a few weeks before returning to him. She met an Air Acolyte at the temple and learned more about how to please her own body with him. She enjoyed herself. She had no regrets about that one either. 

When she returned to Huan the shaman showed Ikki how to tattoo the old way - with a mallet and metal pins - and she inked a tiny copy of her snowflake piercing into the underside of his right wrist. "Now you have a snowflake as well," she told him, and he smiled. 

Huan was commissioned by Firelord Izumi to create a very modern sculpture for the Fire Nation Palace; Ikki learned how to play the flute. Huan wrote letters to his family and to Wu and Ikki sent her spirit forth to find Jinora. Jinora was always glad to see her and hear about her travels. She missed Jinora. She sent funny little presents to Rohan and sometimes Huan drew him little sketches as well of the places they'd seen.

Her hair grew out to the point where it was a shaggy and uneven mess past her chin and one day he sat her down, took up a pair of scissors and cut it into a short bob that skimmed the the very bottom of her earlobes and angled out to her cheeks. Her bangs he kept short enough that the tip of her arrow showed. She loved it. She dressed the in midriff-baring Fire Nation clothes of reds and golds and blacks; there was no way short of covering herself up completely to hide the fact that she was an airbender (Blueberry was a dead giveaway as well) but she found that most Fire Nation citizens didn't have any real expectations of her as an airbender. It had been so long since there were any airbenders in the Fire Nation that she was mostly ignored as being irrelevant. It was rather freeing. Huan changed his clothes as well, even going shirtless in the hot sun. She tried not to be distracted by this. 

Ikki slept with a few more people. Nobody she wanted to stay with, but after one night with a man who was fairly drunk and was just looking for a warm body she learned to be a little more discerning about her partners. Huan never said a word and while Ikki wasn't secretive about it she was at least discreet. She never brought anyone back to wherever she and Huan were staying. They hadn't discussed it but it was something that she at least felt strongly about. She knew how much he disliked having strangers in his personal space, even if that was just a bedroll in a tent.

More than two years had passed before they flew back in to visit Republic City. Her family was overjoyed to see her although her father was clearly unhappy with what she was doing. She loved her father, but it was, after all, her life. She begged a new wingsuit off of Asami - the old one was pretty battered by this point - and Korra admired her hair and insisted on seeing all of Huan's tattoos. They went to Mako and Wu's house and, much to her surprise, Huan threw his arms around Wu and hugged him so hard and for so long that he picked Wu right up off the floor. She couldn't understand it. The few times she'd tried to touch Huan he'd always flinched away. She tried not to be hurt, but she failed.

Next stop was Zaofu, where they got to meet Wing's newest daughter and Su and Baatar welcomed her in. Everyone assumed they were sleeping together. Huan didn't correct them and Ikki was too mortified to say anything. Su gave them a room with a single large bed in it and they slept at opposite ends, an entire valley of the bed empty between them.

Something about the architecture of Zaofu's lotus-like buildings nagged at her, but she couldn't place it. 

After that they went to the Foggy Swamp and stayed for a time. Both of them figured out how to use the spirit vines to enhance their senses - different methodologies, but same sort of results. Ikki taught Huan some airbender moves and he adapted them to metalbending; he showed her how to strengthen her stance and sustain wind by being more grounded. They spent a few months with the waterbenders that lived there. Ikki slept with her first woman and enjoyed it; Huan got a tattoo of the huge banyan-grove tree his grandmother had loved so much over his right pectoral, tapped in by one of the waterbenders. Ikki worked out a way to maneuver the skiffs they used by using wind to propel the flat boats instead of water. They learned traditional swamp tribe songs. Ikki had always had a perfectly serviceable contralto; Huan had a rather lovely baritone. He told her that he had often sung with his siblings. He could harmonize like nobody's business, too. 

They traveled through the former Earth Kingdom, stopping here and there. Wherever they wanted to, really. Huan taught her songs he'd learned in Zaofu; Ikki showed him how airbenders used air to blow into a set of panpipes.  

Sometimes they played. Huan would spool cable for her and she'd fly off the side of Blueberry, spinning in the air, twisting and somersaulting until the cable caught her up and Huan would reel her back up to the saddle. He showed her a game he'd invented for his younger brothers and Opal; he'd have her stand in front of him, facing forward and putting her feet on top of his feet while he put his arms around her. Then he'd move them along the ground, faster and faster, gliding along so smoothly that it seemed like he was flying. He'd cause the earth to go in bumps and rolls, dodging trees and rocks at the very last second, making her shriek with laughter. Soon she made him hold her while she sat on his shoulders, the wind streaming through her hair. She'd fling her arms out and whoop with joy. She took him up on an air scooter; the first time and only time they did it they he clutched at her and squeezed his eyes shut, gasping at her to stop just before the poor man vomited all over the ground. Right. No air scooters for Huan.

She taught him how to steer Blueberry. He was very affectionate with her and never minded brushing her or helping to care for her. For some reason he found it amusing to feed her wild blueberries, and he'd patiently pick at the bushes, coming out with blue-stained fingers and never enough blueberries to satisfy Blue herself.

_She dreamt more than once of the Black Hall (as she'd come to think of it in her mind). She continued to explore it, finding a courtyard that opened up to the blue sky above, mountains seen in the distance. Once birds flew past. It still nagged at her, seemed familiar. In her dreams she'd hear snatches of voices; nothing she could understand, just whispers and echoes. She'd catch a glimpse of people out of the corner of her eye but they'd be gone before she could finish turning her head to look. The pull of it got stronger and stronger each time she dreamed of it._

_One night she dreamed of Huan's older brother, Baatar Junior. He was older, with gray at his temples. He stood over some sort of a map, frowning. She wasn't sure what to make of that one._

As always she and Huan talked, shared ideas, thoughts, experiences. Huan didn't talk much at all to the strangers they met along the way; mostly he kept silent and looked away from them, often letting his hair loose and hiding behind it. But he spoke to her, and if he got lost in his thoughts and couldn't find the words Ikki understood what he meant most of the time. She also learned how to leave him alone when he got so focused on something that he wasn't easily reachable. He wouldn't hear her if she spoke to him; if she tried to touch him to get his attention he'd react very badly. A few times he'd come out of wherever he was in his head to find her gone and he'd panic, once shouting at her and refusing to speak to her for several days when she and Blueberry had gone to the nearest village for supplies. She got angry in return, telling him that she had told him that they were out of food and she couldn't just wait for him to come back to her, that she and Blue needed to eat, at least.

Ikki hated fighting. Huan didn't seem to be any fonder of it than she was.

She went out on a particular search soon after that. She brought him back three rocks she'd found; clear quartz, red jasper and a mossy chunk of green agate. She asked him to embed them into three sides of a metal square. Amused, he did so.

When he was finished he handed it to her and she placed it on the ground, turning it to show him each stone on top. "White means I am around here. Green means that I am away but will be returning that day. Red means something is wrong and I will leave a note. Now when you come back from inside your head you'll know where I am."

He stared at the square for a few moments, and then he smiled. "Ikki knows," he said, and he took her hand and squeezed it. "What about the plain sides?"

"Oh, those don't mean anything, I just didn't know what other shape to use," she said, and he laughed.

She tried not to stare at him when he was working. She tried not to stare at him when he was swimming. She thought more than once it would be easier if he was still dressed head to toe in all of those formal Zaofu robes like he was when she first met him instead of wearing a pair of cropped trousers and a vest. The brown skin of his back, covered with swirls and loops of inked in indigo and charcoal and vermillion, intruded into her dreams. She wanted to know how those hands, those artist's hands, would feel on her body. She tried to buffet the thoughts out of her mind with airbender forms and was mostly unsuccessful. Ignoring her aunt's advice she actively sought out someone to sleep with when the thoughts of Huan got to be too much for her. Kya was right, of course. It made things worse, not better.

 *******************

After a return trip to Zaofu to attend Opal and Bolin's wedding they eventually made their way to the ruins of the Northern Air Temple. Ikki had told Huan that her father had taken Bolin to look at it and Bolin had said it wasn't salvageable. Huan frowned. "Bolin is good at what he is good at, but he's no craftsman. Your father didn't need a lavabender to look at it. I doubt Bolin even went to see if the foundations were still solid. I'll map what's there; I can send it to my father, ask him."

It was as they were approaching the wreck of it, slabs of cooled lava and stone melting down the side of the mountain that she understood what she'd seen in her dreams. It was this place. It was here. The Black Hall was here. Somehow, out of the destruction, it was here. She was so startled that she dropped Blue's reins, standing atop her neck, reaching her hand out. 

She took several deep breaths before sitting back down. She circled the ruins until she found a ledge on the southern side that was relatively unscathed. Large enough to house the both of them and Blueberry with room to spare. They settled there and began to explore, setting up their well-used camping materials. She debated with their bedrolls. Huan couldn't sleep if anyone was too close to him; he'd jolt awake in irritation at the slightest touch. No cuddler, him. It had never been an issue since they'd always had separate bedrolls (or at least until the big bed in Zaofu). However, she knew first hand how cold the nights got up here and she worried about him, he had no way to regulate his body temperature the way she could as an airbender. She approached him with the idea that they could put their bedrolls together and enclose the area with stone and he agreed, bending a cozy shelter around their combined bedrolls. The first night was difficult - the roof of the shelter was far too close to their heads for Ikki's taste; Huan barely slept at all trying to avoid Ikki moving in her sleep. The next night they solved that problem by Huan raising the roof of the shelter and Ikki rolling up a blanket and putting it between them as a bolster. They both slept that night.

 _She dreamed, and in her dream the Black Hall - no, the_ Temple _, it was the Temple - seemed brighter, happier. She heard the echoes of laughter down its halls. She woke up and lay there for a time, hands pressed to the floor. "I'm here," she whispered. "I'm here."_

Huan spent a few weeks in the heart of the mountain, sinking through the rock down into what was left of the ruined temple, mapping what he was finding on sheets of paper he'd gotten from the nearest village. Ikki was surprised to see how precise his drawings were; he just smiled. "Junior isn't the only one that ever learned anything from Dad," he said, and he packed them carefully in a waterproof tube and mailed them to Zaofu.

Ikki got to know the people in the nearest village. Some of them were descendants of the people who were living in the temple when her grandfather came to reclaim it. They had some wonderful hand-me-down stories to tell Ikki about that time. She learned a few new airbender songs from them; according to one very old woman she had learned them from scrolls left there, scavenged by her grandparents once upon a time. Ikki was no musician but the local music teacher helped her transcribe them to send to her parents. She knew her mother especially would love to have them.

She had to keep herself busy. Having Huan sleep that close to her every night was slowly killing her. She had no idea what to do with herself. She thought of sending her spirit to talk to her Aunt Kya but in the end decided not to. She started to do her airbending forms before bed instead of in the morning, trying to wear herself out.

A month or so after Huan had sent on his drawings Su and Baatar showed up unannounced in an airship. Baatar spread paper everywhere and soon he and Huan were lost in plans and discussions of columns and supporting walls; Ikki joined Su on the airship and took a very long shower. "I miss showers," she confessed, and Su laughed.

"When I was living for a time with the sandbenders I was more than a little disappointed to realize that they bathed themselves with sand. I never did get used to that," Su replied. She handed Ikki a cup of tea, and cocked her head at her, a move so completely like her son's that Ikki nearly dropped her teacup. "So. You and Huan. You are using birth control, right?"

Spirits save her from nosy older women and their discussions of birth control! Ikki's cheeks caught fire. "Uh...there's no need. We don't do that. Any of that."

Su looked surprised. "Oh! I hadn't realized that you preferred women."

Ikki shook her head, her face burning. "It's not that. It's just that I don't think Huan is interested in me like that."

Su raised one eyebrow very slowly. "Why would you think that?"

Ikki shrugged, trying to look casual as opposed to humiliated. "Ah, he never does anything. Never starts anything. You know."

Su sat back and tapped her finger on the table. "Ikki, sweetie, that's not how Huan works. You've been traveling with him for three years now, I'm frankly surprised you haven't realized that yet. Have you made it clear to him that you're interested? Clear in ways that he'll understand? He doesn't usually pick up on subtle signals, as I'm sure you must know by now. Spirits know I had to just tell his father straight to his face that I wanted to sleep with him, and Baatar is nowhere near as bad at understanding other people as Huan is. If I had left it up to Baatar we would have gotten nowhere."

Ikki drank her tea and thought about this for awhile. "Right," she said. Su nodded at her and changed the subject.

"It still kills me to see the temple like this. It's not that I got to take the tour or anything the last time I was here, we were in a bit of a hurry and I had other things on my mind, but it was beautiful. Are you really thinking of trying to do something with it?"

"It _was_ beautiful. I loved it here. More than any of the other temples. It's the mountains all around it; I suppose I've had my fill of islands. I used to sneak out in the middle of the night and watch the stars. It's so clear all the way up here up above the clouds. It gets pretty cold up here as well, but I like it. It's a little wilder than the rest of the temples, even more so now, obviously. Oh, I don't know. It's not like we actually _need_ a temple up here; there still aren't enough airbenders to justify even one temple at this point, although I hope there will enough airbenders to fill all the temples again someday." 

"I'm sure there will be."

"I suppose, too, that it would make sense to rebuild somewhere else, leave this place to die. I guess I hate to give up on anything, and this place just feels like it wants to be reborn again." She laughed a little self-consciously. "Sorry, got all airbender there on you."

"No, actually," Su said thoughtfully. "Zaofu felt like that to me. The valley, I mean, before we started to build there. It was beautiful, to be sure, what with the mountains and the rivers, but that wasn't why I built there. Well, not the only reason. Baatar and I looked at other sites and there were a few others that made more sense logistically. But that valley, it just wanted me to build there. I sensed it."

"That's what it feels like here. It feels like it wants me to bring it back. Not repair it, but rebuild it. Transform it. Bring it back from the ashes." She suddenly laughed. "A little like a dragon bird spirit, I suppose."

Su put her hand on top of Ikki's hand and squeezed it. "I think you should listen to your intuition then, Ikki. If the place wants you to rebuild, then that's what you should do."

That night, after they'd had their dinner up on Ikki and Huan's ledge, Su stood up and patted Baatar on the shoulder. "Well, I think it's time for you and I to take our leave this evening, sweetie."

Baatar blinked. "It's still pretty early. I thought Huan and I could go over some more of the plans tonight."

Su looked at Ikki as if to say, you see what I mean? She looked her husband in the eyes. "I'm sure Ikki and Huan have other things to do tonight."

Baatar looked confused for a moment and then his face cleared. "Right! Of course! Well, we'll just take our leave then and see you kids in the morning. Not too early, though!"

"Blue and I will give you a lift," said Ikki, and she took them down to the area lower down the mountain where they'd tethered the airship.

"If he's what you want, then be blunt." Su said quietly to Ikki. "Just lay it out for him. He won't be offended."

Ikki thought about it as Blue made her way back up. They landed and Huan got up from looking at the plans and helped her to unsaddle Blue. When they were done and Blue had settled down, he went back to the plans, sitting cross-legged on the floor.

"Huan," she said, and took a deep breath. "I want to talk to you."

"Okay," he said, and kept looking at the plans.

"Huan, do you want to sleep with me?"

He glanced up at her. "We already do that. Why are you asking that?"

She took another deep breath. "Right. I don't mean that. What I mean is do you want to have sex with me?"

He froze. 

"Because I would like that. With you, I mean. Sex. You know. _Sex_."

"Ah," he replied, and he looked back down at his papers.

She desperately forged on. "I just...I thought I was being clear that I wanted to, and maybe I was and you didn't want to and if so that's fine, just tell me and I won't bring it up again or anything and oh spirits this is awkward but if you did want want to then I'm amenable to that, you know, well, actually, if we're getting technical I'm more than amenable to it, I'd really like to and maybe I wasn't being clear enough about it before and please say something, Huan, before I die right here on the spot."

There was a pen laying near the plans he had been studying, and he picked it up. He reached out and gestured towards her. When she walked over he pulled her down to sit next to him and took her hand in his, turning it slightly so it was palm down. He held it still on the ground and then drew on her hand, a little sketch of a man who was clearly meant to be himself. There were black clouds all around his head; lightning was striking him. Ikki laughed.

"Poor Huan. That's not good."

He took the other hand, drawing an Ikki with a bob, complete with airbender tattoos. Around her were rainbows and butterflies and flowers. He took her hands and put them together, and then drew a sad face on the Ikki.

"Oh no, that's not true! You don't make me sad!"

He smiled, and changed the sad face with a few strokes into an Ikki that looked to be full of wonder and surprise.

"That's better," she said.

The pen froze above her arm. Right. She had on her wingsuit. She unhooked the fastening under her chin and stripped it down, only removing her bracelets long enough to pull her arms out of the skintight material before putting them back on. She never took off her bracelets. She pushed the wingsuit down to her waist, sitting there in just her bra. He moved the pen above the bracelet and drew on her right forearm, the fanciful trees of her place in the Spirit World. Above the Ikki, on her other forearm, he drew one of the folding lotus buildings of Zaofu.

"Yes," she said. 

Up her arms, across her shoulders, dancing across her collarbone, he drew various scenes of where they had traveled. The volcano in the Fire Nation; the Foggy Swamp, a forest glade that had been filled with unexpected wild roses, Blueberry flew across the area right below her breasts. 

"The story of Ikki and Huan," she whispered, as he drew the mountains around them across her belly. She took her hands and ran them along her arms and across her shoulders and collarbone, down across her breasts and stomach. "All those travels together." She brought them to her waist, and then brought her hands together again. "We can't erase it, it's all here."

She reached and unfastened her bra, shrugging out of it, letting it slide to the floor. She was tall and full-breasted, taking more after her father's side than her mother's. Huan took the pen up again and leaned forward, drawing across her breasts. The ledge they were on, their warm little bedroll nest inside the rock cave he'd made. Her nipples pebbled up under his touch, and he ran an experimental finger across them.

"Oh," she gasped before she could stop herself.

He pulled back. She reached forward and took his hand and placed it on her breast again. He slowly drew his thumb across her nipple and she shuddered.

She wasn't sure how to touch him. He loathed the kind of light and affectionate touches she'd been used to doing with her own family - a hand to the shoulder, a tickling of the ribs, a brush of air past the ear. He reacted badly to that kind of touch.

"How do you want to be touched?" she asked.

"No air touch," he said. "Air touch makes my skin scream. Touch me like earth."

"Show me," she said and he took her hands and pulled her into their little bed cave, showing her how and where he wanted to be touched. She wasn't an earthbender, but she'd been with him for three years. She'd learned a fair amount about how he operated. Deep pressure, he meant. Close. Balanced. Grounded. Strong. She leaned into him and bit down into where the banyan tree was inked into his chest. He closed his eyes and moaned.

"What touch do you want?" he asked, his voice hoarse, but she couldn't answer. A breeze was picking up around them, even in their little cave. She knew she was doing it but couldn't seem to stop herself. "Let's find out together," he said, turning his focus on her. It was intense; it was nearly smothering. The airbender in her tried to flutter free but he held her steady until she shattered apart. She remembered what he had said and she gripped him tightly around his waist as he entered her. His hair slipped out of the pins and slid across her her with each thrust of his hips, swirling with the force of the wind she was creating. Air touch, those tendrils dancing and tickling across her skin and much to her surprise she came again, right before he did.

Afterward she went to the lip of their ledge and stood there under the stars, bending her breath to keep herself warm, naked as she was. He let her be. She took deep lungfuls of the frigid air and let the wind buffet her body. She felt like flying.

Eventually she walked back in to find him burrowed deep within their blankets. 

"Are you asleep?" she whispered.

"No," he said, and she smiled. One hand lifted and opened up the blankets; a clear invitation. She slid inside and found the bolster wasn't there. "I thought you couldn't sleep without the blanket there," she said.

"I'm not sleeping yet," he replied.

"This wasn't your first time, was it?" she asked, rolling over to her side.

"No. I had a girlfriend in Zaofu a few years ago. It didn't work out."

"You never said!"

He smiled, she could hear it in his voice, even if she couldn't see him very well. "You never asked."

"Good point." She lay there for a moment.

"You know, I don't care if you sleep with other people. Have sex, I mean."

She propped herself up on her elbow. "You don't?"

"No. I know you've been doing that anyhow. It doesn't bother me. It's not that big a deal with me. I like sex, but I don't think about it all the time. If you do, then you should have it. Like you've been doing."

"Seriously, it doesn't bother you?"

"No."

She thought about this for awhile. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Do you want to have sex with other people?"

"Not really, no. I'd rather work on my art than have sex."

Ikki started to laugh. "Thanks a lot. Good to know I rate under art."

"Oh. No, having sex with you was like working on my art, my body liked it and my head told me yes. I want to do it again. With _you_ , I mean. I am amenable."

She smiled to herself and took it in the complementary spirit in which it was intended. "Thank you. If I decide to have sex with someone other than you then I promise I won't bring anyone home. I know you don't like strangers."

"Yeah. I like you, though. You make me happy. _We_ make me happy."

"You do realize that most people would think this a very strange arrangement?"

He scoffed. "Like we care what other people think."

"Good point again."

They were silent for awhile before his hand curled around her hip. "Oh, you're cold!" He sounded surprised.

Ikki put her icy feet on him and laughed when he yelped. 

 ********************

His parents stayed for another month, Baatar and Huan spending countless hours together on the plans. At one point Huan wrapped his arms around his father and bent the both of them into the rock, down into the foundations. He'd already explained to Ikki that Gazan had destroyed one section of the foundations but other parts of it had survived intact. With Ikki's help in directing the air currents he'd cleaned up the debris in the air channels that had been placed there all the centuries before by whomever had built the temple in the first place. He had assured both his parents and Ikki that it was safe in that area. Ikki believed him; she understood that as a Beifong there wasn't much anyone else could be teaching him about earthbending, the same way that there really wasn't anyone alive that could teach her and her siblings about airbending.

Baatar came back out, gasping, his eyes wide and terrified behind his lenses. "Well, I knew there was a reason I wasn't an earthbender! Don't ever do that to me again! Build your poor old father a tunnel, Huan!"

Huan smiled. "Okay, Dad." He and his mother proceeded together to do just that.

At the end of the month Baatar and Huan laid out all of the plans, showing them to Su and Ikki. Ikki needed to be guided through; she'd never looked at any kind of construction planning before. Between the two of them they'd come up with a plan that would allow them to rebuild the Northern Air Temple. It wasn't a repair; there was simply too much damage for that, the entire structure of the mountain had changed. However, a new temple was possible. Huan had drawn what the final temple would look like and it was beautiful; black glass, twining into the sky, dark and lovely. Utterly different than the other four temples. Ikki's breath was taken away.

"You can't do it alone," Baatar said to Huan. "If you really want to do it you'll need a staff of benders here. Is that what you want? I know you won't want to supervise."

Huan shook his head. "You know I can't supervise people. No time in my head. And I can't build, not like that. I can do the decorative work but someone has to build it first."

"I know a few good benders who could help start you out, and well, maybe I could supervise for a bit." Baatar looked at his wife. "I mean, not forever or anything. Just for a little while."

Su laughed. "Well, I'm sure Wing and Nuo will handle things admirably in Zaofu if we are away for a little longer. We should get a radio back up here, though."

"I guess someone should show these to my Dad," Ikki said slowly.

Su and Baatar looked at each other. "You haven't discussed this with your father?" Baatar asked.

"Easier to ask forgiveness than get permission," said Huan, and he smiled at Ikki.

"Well, we know that's your approach, Huan, but maybe Ikki has a little more maturity than that!" Su said, wagging her finger at him.

"Not really," said Ikki, and she laughed.

Su sat back for a moment. "I suppose we could take the plans to Tenzin, see what he thinks. I don't know why he'd say no, but it's certainly not my place to make that decision."

"You let me handle my father," Ikki said. "Bring your earthbenders here before the snow flies in the valley. We'll just do it. After all, the temples belong to all the airbenders, not just my father."

Su smiled at her. "Why, Ikki! With that kind of attitude you might be mistaken for a Beifong."

Ikki snorted. "Have you never met my aunt and uncle? I come by my attitude pretty naturally."

Su laughed and nudged Ikki's foot with her toe. "Your grandfather would have agreed."

The rest of the evening was spent discussing housing for the earthbenders (Su seemed to know all about this thanks to vast experience in Zaofu) how to get them up and down the mountain with only Blueberry for transportation (Ikki resolved to immediately find out where Yung was - she knew he was fairly unhappy with the nomadic lifestyle and figured he might actually enjoy being here, she remembered that he'd mentioned once that he and his family were builders in Ba Sing Se before he'd woken up an airbender and besides, he had an air bison now, so points for that) and other logistics such as getting the radio installed and making sure there was running water. 

Su and Baatar left the next morning, promising to return with earthbenders as well some equipment. Baatar was nearly effervescent in his excitement; Su kept looking at him and smiling. Ikki and Huan walked back inside of their ledge as the airship flew out of sight.

"I was thinking I could redirect some water here," he said. "I'm no waterbender and no engineer but I'm pretty sure there's a spring up that way. I think I could manage to get some water here."

"That would be good," she said. "Huan, how did we end up doing this? Being here? Rebuilding this temple?"

He cocked his head at her. He hardly ever looked away from her now; he told her it was easier to look at people when he knew them well. "Do you want to stop? Should we stop? We can, you know."

She walked over and shuffled through the plans, finding the one where he had sketched the final design in. She tapped her finger on it. "I've been dreaming about this place since I was about eleven or so. Well, ten years ago." She laughed suddenly. "I'll be twenty-two next week, I just realized."

"I'd make you a cake but I can't cook. Also, we have no oven. Or cake ingredients." He smiled. "I could make you a metal cake, would that suffice?"

She wrinkled her nose at him and shuffled through the plans until she came to the one that laid out a great hallway. "There will be a fountain in this one." He joined her, looking down at it. "It has a mosaic, with stones."

He pointed at a spot on the paper. "With all of the signs on it. Earth, air, water, fire. And a dragon bird spirit. This is where I think the water is. I need someone to help me, though. I can't make the mechanics work. But this is where I want it to be." He took up a pen and grabbed a piece of scratch paper, quickly laying down the lines of her fountain. "That's how I see it in my mind."

"Yes!" she said. "Huan, that's exactly it. That's how I see it in my dreams!"

He gently tapped her head with the pen and then tapped his own head. "From you to me. From me to you." He laid his palm across the paper, and she laid her own palm beside his. 

She slid his hand across the paper and entwined it in her own. "Ours together."

The breeze picked up around them, ruffling the plans under their hands. The Temple sang for joy.


	2. Forgive No One Just Yet: Baatar Beifong, Junior

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning on this one. It's Baatar and Kuvira, and it's not at all nice. They aren't nice people. Consider yourself good and warned.

184 AG, Republic City Prison: Non-Benders Wing  
Baatar Beifong, Junior

 

"Mail for you, Beifong."

Baatar glanced up as the guard tossed a cylinder through the bars onto his bed. It'd been opened and gone through, of course, but obviously hadn't contained anything deemed too interesting and/or subversive. He didn't recognize the handwriting on the outside. 

He unscrewed the cap, turned it upside down and shook, but the paper had lodged inside. Fucking assholes. The least they could have done when they put it back in after inspecting it was roll it up properly instead of jamming it up in there. He carefully eased the paper out and rolled it out across his bed.

"Whatcha got there, huh?" His cellmate, Itaru, tried to look over his shoulder.

"Fuck off," Baatar snarled, and the guy went back to doing whatever the hell else he did besides jerk off and talk about all the women he was going to bone once he got out of prison.

"Scuze the fuck out of me, rich boy."

Baatar ignored him. There were several sheets covered with drawings and plans of some sort of temple building. He recognized his father's work immediately.

The final sheet had a sketch of a fountain on it, covered with what looked like some sort of mosaic. In Huan's precise handwriting, next to the fountain, were the words _I don't know how to make it work._

Baatar's fingers let the drawings slide back down to the bed. Oh spirits. Oh fuck. Ten years. Ten years, nothing from Huan. Nothing. Not a word, not a letter, nothing.

 

*********************

Junior was too young to really understand what it meant to be a non-bender when he learned that's what he was. His grandmother had come to visit and she was sitting in his mother's office. Huan was sitting on the floor in front of Mom, staring at his fingers and Junior was near the door, sitting on the floor with a toy train, making quiet noises as he rushed it across the floor.

Grandma Toph scowled in his general direction. "Well, Junior takes after his father. No bender, that one." 

"Mom, it doesn't matter," his mother said. Her belly was big with Opal.

His grandmother snorted. "Well, it's a damn shame, anyhow. A Beifong without bending."

"Please, Mom. He'll hear you." His mother tried to offer Huan a toy but Huan simply stared at his fingers.

"Can you hear me, Junior?" his grandmother called over to him.

"No," he replied.

"Liar," said his grandmother, with a sniff. "Huan, though. Bender there."

His mother's voice was sad. "I don't think so."

"Don't tell me what I know or don't know about bending, Suyin. Huan's a bender. Wait and see."

 *********************

Huan never wanted to play. He just sat and stared at the floor. Sometimes he'd scream for what seemed like hours. He never answered or even looked around when people talked to him. He wouldn't even walk. It was different when Opal was born, though. Opal wasn't a bender either. He liked Opal. She was sweet and funny and followed him around everywhere he went. Oh sure, he grumped at her for tagging along, but secretly he loved how she looked up to him like that. It made him feel good, being a big brother to her.

Junior was smart, everyone said so, all of his teachers, even Dad said so. He excelled in school. Sometimes Dad let him take things apart, like old radios and things. Junior loved taking things apart. He liked figuring out how they worked. He liked fixing things that were broken. He liked trying to put things back together so that they were better. When he'd do that and take it into Dad, Dad would always stop whatever he was doing and take a look. "That's really clever, Junior," Dad would say, with a big smile. "You want to try to fix this as well?" Then he'd hand over something new. Junior could always fix it. _Always._

He loved to spend time with Dad. He and Dad had the same name, even, it was like they were a special club, just Baatar and Baatar. Dad was never too busy or too tired to listen to Junior's ideas, either.

Well, except when Dad was trying to get Huan to talk. Or walk. Or do anything that normal kids did, anyhow. Both Dad and Mom tried to get Huan to be normal. But everybody in Zaofu knew something was wrong with Huan, even if they wouldn't say it out loud. They'd whisper, though, and make these fake sad faces about it. Junior hated the fake sad faces the most.

Once Junior saw Dad sitting down on the floor next to Huan and Dad was crying. Tears were running down his face and and he kept saying, "Oh Huan, my boy, my boy." Huan just ignored him like he ignored everybody.

*********************

It was the year before the twins were born that Kuvira came to Zaofu. She was an earthbender. She was two years older than Junior. She wasn't very nice to anybody at first but Mom said that they had to be nice to her because her parents weren't around to care for her any more and that it made Kuvira really sad. Kuvira went to live with a family in Zaofu that didn't have any other children and she went to the same school as him but she wasn't as smart as Junior. No one seemed to care though, because she was a really good bender. His Mom said that Kuvira was one of the best benders she had ever seen. That made Junior feel kind of bad that he wasn't a bender, too.

Not long after the twins were born Kuvira was at their house, staring at Huan, who was just sitting there looking at Dad's Pai Sho board. Sometimes Huan could sit there and stare at the board for hours, it seemed. Sometimes he lined all of the pieces up, over and over again.

"What's wrong with him?" she asked Junior.

He shrugged. "I dunno. He's always like that."

"Hey, stupid!" Kuvira leaned over and put her face into Huan's face. Huan froze, and his face scrunched up.

"Don't do that to him," said Junior. "It's not nice. He can't help it."

"I can't believe your parents didn't just lock him up somewhere," she said, scornfully. She leaned over again. "Hey dummy!" she said right into Huan's ear, and Huan started to wail. Kuvira leapt back.

His mother came rushing in. "Huan, sweetie, no, it's okay, shhh shhh shhh," she tried to pick him up, but Huan struggled in her arms, screaming even louder. "What happened?" she asked Kuvira and Junior.

"I don't know, Su. He just started screaming," Kuvira said, putting on a fake sad face. "Poor Huan."

Junior didn't say anything at all.

*********************

 

He rolled the plans back up - properly, spirits be damned - and stowed them under his bed. Itaru tried to bring them up a few times until Baatar told him, in no uncertain terms, what he'd do to him if he even so much as thought of touching them. Itaru backed off. For the most part Baatar just minded his own business and stayed aloof, but every once in awhile that Beifong temper would come out and Itaru had already caught the upside of it a few times. Itaru had learned the hard way why it was worth his while to leave Baatar the hell alone.

He tried not to think about the fountain while he was doing his daily stint in the prison's mechanics workshop. Originally they'd assigned him to the laundry, all those years ago, but one of the machines had broken down one day and he'd just fixed it without being asked. That got him a transfer. It was fine. There were only two other guys working down there with him now and both of them kept to themselves as well. Baatar had a reputation for being standoffish anyhow and after knocking the shit out of the few guys who tried to show some dominance over him in those first few months he was pretty much left alone. Which is how he wanted it.

Turned out that all of those hours he spent working out with Kuvira paid off. He might not be a bender but he could at least throw a punch, which is more than teenaged Junior could have said. Junior was a pushover. Junior was _weak._

Baatar was not. Baatar was most definitely fucking not.

 

******************

Grandma Toph came and stayed in Zaofu for a long time. She spent most of it with Huan. Just sitting there for hours, handing him rocks. Huan just sat there, rocks in hand. Doing nothing.

"He really is stupid, isn't he?" Kuvira said one afternoon after school. Junior was about ten or so. Kuvira was usually around their place after school, his mother would work with her on her bending. The twins, too, both Wei and Wing were little but were still managing to shove rocks around. Even though there was a special after school training program for all of the benders still in school Kuvira usually came over to their place and worked with Mom and the twins. Mom told anybody who would listen how gifted a bender Kuvira was. Kuvira liked that. When Mom praised her Kuvira was always in a really good mood. Junior liked Kuvira in a good mood. She was a lot of fun when she was in a good mood.

"Mom doesn't like anyone calling him stupid," Junior warned.

Kuvira scoffed. "Well, she's his mother, she has to say that." They were standing on the one side of the courtyard, watching Grandma Toph and Huan. "I bet I could learn a lot from your Grandma. She should be teaching me, not _him_. I'm good. Really good. Even your Mom says that."

"Uh huh," said Junior. Everybody knew Kuvira was good. She bragged about it a lot, too. Junior was really smart and really good at fixing things, but you didn't hear him bragging about it all over the place. 

Opal came up to them. "Did Huan bend the rocks yet?" she asked, peering across the courtyard.

"Not yet," said Junior.

"Like he ever would," said Kuvira. "Stupid."

Opal frowned. "Don't say that about Huan. Grandma Toph says he'll learn bending. If she says it then it has to be true."

Kuvira's mouth went all thin the way it did when she got angry. "Your Grandma doesn't know shit."

Opal's mouth dropped open. "My Grandma is the best earthbender in the whole world!"

Kuvira's hand snaked out and gripped Opal's upper arm. "Says who?" she hissed.

"Ow! Stop it! That hurts!" Opal said, trying to pull away.

"Hey, come on Kuvira, don't do that, Opal's just a little kid," Junior said.

"Take your fucking hands off my granddaughter, girl," called Grandma Toph from across the courtyard. Uh oh. Grandma must have heard them. Grandma had really good hearing. Like freaky good.

Kuvira dropped her hand and stomped across the courtyard to stand in front of Grandma. 

"I'm the best bender my age that Su has ever seen," she said to Grandma, lifting her chin up. "She told me so. You should be training me, not wasting time with _him_."

Opal and Junior inched their way across the courtyard. Opal slid her hand into Junior's.

Grandma smiled. It wasn't a nice smile. "And who are _you_ , girl? Who are you to think you can get training from me?"

Kuvira looked uncertain.

"Some little piece of flotsam and jetsam, eh? Little scrap of nothing that Su picked up out of pity. What makes you think I would waste my time with you?"

Kuvira's lower lip started to wobble. Opal's hand tightened in Junior's grip.

"So you think I should give up my own flesh and blood for you? Is that what you think, girl?"

"But I'm good," Kuvira said. She had tears in her eyes.

"Good bender? You're decent. You've got promise, sure. You're a pushy little thing, though, aren't you? Think everybody owes you a favor just because you had a rough beginning. You think I should give up on this boy here, this grandson of mine who needs my help, just to make you better? You think you need me more than him?"

"But I'm good! You could help me get better! He's just a waste of time!"

Grandma's face changed. Her voice went all cold and hard. "You ever call this child a waste of time again and I will make sure that you live to regret it. You hear me, girl?"

Kuvira stood there, face red, hands clenched into fists. She stared at Huan, and the look on her face scared Junior. Grandma couldn't see Kuvira's look, but he could, and so could Opal, who was pressing against him. Kuvira looked at Huan with such loathing. Junior was afraid of that look.

Kuvira turned and ran out of the courtyard, banging into Opal, who staggered with the force of it. Junior steadied her.

Grandma turned her face in the direction that Kuvira had run. "Su's making a mistake with that one," she said slowly. Junior knew she wasn't really talking to them. "That girl is trouble in the making. I've seen her type before."

"Who, Grandma?" asked Opal. She hadn't let go of Junior's hand.

"Firebender girl, once upon a time," said Grandma. "Nobody you kids know." She shook herself a little and then she smiled and it looked like Grandma's real smile. "Now tell me, what did you kids learn in school today? How platypus bears shit in the woods?"

Opal giggled. "Grandma!"

"Oh excuse me, how platypus bears _poop_ in the woods. Or was it something useful and boring like how many provinces are there in the Earth Kingdom?" She snorted and handed Huan another rock.

"Waste of time," Huan said, looking up from the ground. Huan didn't really talk much, so it surprised all of them when he said it.

Grandma turned towards Huan. "You are not a waste of time, Huan. You have _never_ been a waste of time. Do you hear me? You just see things differently than other people. There's no waste of time about that. I should know."

"Yeah, Huan," said Opal. "I love you. I don't care what stupid old smelly Kuvira says. Don't listen to her. What does she know?"

Junior didn't say anything at all.

******************

 

He wasn't going to think about the fucking fountain.

He was going to do his fifty daily crunches. His pull-ups. His push-ups. His squats. He was going to do his run around the exercise yard and he wasn't going to think of temples or fountains or his family or anything else. He'd do what he did every single day; do his work, keep his head down, wear himself out so he could sleep.

He had five hundred eighty seven days left of his sentence. Tomorrow it was going to be five hundred eighty six. He could do this. He could do this.

He could do this.

 

******************

Huan started bending. It took a long time, but he finally got it. Once he started, he didn't stop. He moved metal like it was water; moved earth without effort. Once Grandma Toph had managed to explain the seismic sense in a way that he could understand it he got that as well. Grandma Bhuti and Grandpa Norbu came to visit for an entire summer and Grandma Bhuti - who was a really good painter, lots of people wanted to buy her paintings - gave Huan a paint brush and paper to help him learn how hold on to things with his fingers. (Huan was really clumsy, he usually dropped things when he was holding them.) Turned out that Huan could actually draw very well once he figured out how to hold a paintbrush properly. One day Huan started bending old scrap pieces of metal into shapes and Mom and Dad and Grandma Bhuti made a big deal about it. Junior thought they were pretty dumb looking, but whatever. It was pretty cool that Huan could do it, though.

Junior was doing so well in school that the teachers told his parents that they needed to get different books for him; more difficult books. More advanced. Dad made that happen right away. Dad even gave him his own little workshop to do stuff in. He loved his workshop. 

The twins picked up metalbending and Kuvira did too. Mom always included Kuvira in her lessons with the twins. Whenever Mom praised Kuvira she was so happy. Huan rarely had lessons with the twins and Kuvira - he didn't like the kind of lessons Mom gave, and so he'd either figure things out on his own or wait for Grandma Toph to visit. 

One day Mom and Kuvira and the twins were outside, working on trying to get metal sheets to mold around their bodies. The twins kept dropping them and laughing; Mom rolled her eyes at them and told them to quit messing around but she wasn't really mad. Kuvira was trying to get it, though, concentrating very hard. Mom was guiding her through the process. Kuvira was getting frustrated; they'd been working on it all week and she just wasn't getting it. Mom told her to be patient, that it would get there, but Kuvira wasn't happy.

"Kuvira, sweetie, just shake it off, take a deep breath and try another approach. Not everything comes the first time you try it."

"I know I can get it!" Kuvira scowled at the metal sheet.

"Of course you can. You will." Mom smiled at her and then turned to the twins. "Wei! Stop trying to take your brother's head off! Honestly, you two! Either concentrate or go back inside!"

Huan had been sitting on the other side of the courtyard, doing something with an orb of metal. He put it down and walked over to the sheet of metal that Wing had abandoned to chase after Wei. He reached his hands out and the metal softened and flowed, up off the ground like a swaying snake before entwining itself around his waist.

Mom's face lit up, but she tried to keep her cool. If you drew too much attention to Huan he'd freak out a little, just duck his head and walk away or start that weird fluttery thing he did with his fingers. The metal flowed up from Huan's waist around his arms.

"Wow!" said Wei, stepping closer to Huan.

"Yeah, Huan! Wow!" echoed Wing.

Huan smiled just slightly, pleased.

"Very well done, Huan," said Mom, still trying to be casual. "Good use of control."

"Thanks," whispered Huan, looking at the ground. He trembled a little bit, but the metal continued to mold around his back.

Junior was the only one not looking at Huan, which is why he was the only one who saw the look Kuvira gave Huan.

It was at that point that Junior realized it wasn't just dislike that Kuvira was feeling towards Huan. It was hate. Pure, unadulterated hate.

Junior didn't say anything at all.

********************

Sometimes Kuvira was really fun. Sometimes she wasn't so fun. She sometimes teased Junior, called him Dummy or Four-Eyes or Toothpick. She was always interested in the things he was making in his workshop, though; she was never too busy to come and look and she was always complimentary. It made him feel good. 

Once, after he helped her with some very tricky math she was having a hard time with at school, she kissed him on the cheek. It felt like nothing else had ever felt. She was popular at school, too; pretty, athletic, an amazing bender. Everyone knew that she was Su Beifong's star metalbending pupil. Junior and Opal weren't benders, the twins were too young for anyone to pay attention to and Huan...well. Huan went to school, but he kept to himself for the most part. Sometimes he had a hard time in school, sometimes he was really embarrassing, like when he got upset and put his hands over his ears and sat down in the middle of the hallway and refused to move no matter what the teachers said. Kuvira, though, everyone liked Kuvira. She made sure that Junior was included in her crowd, even if he was two years younger and kind of a nerd. He was really grateful for that. If not for Kuvira he probably wouldn't have any friends at all, not with the stupid glasses and the fact that he was such a skinny little dork. That's what Kuvira said and she was right, too.

When Junior was seventeen, his father sat him down and talked to him about Republic City University. It had an amazing engineering department; they were doing all kinds of really unbelievable stuff there. It was pretty obvious by this time that Junior was going to be an engineer instead of an architect like his father but his father never minded. He was proud of Junior; he said so all the time. They sat down together and looked at brochures from the University and Dad even talked Mom into letting the two of them take a trip, just the two of them, to go and visit Republic City to see the University. Junior was incredibly excited.

He went to tell Kuvira about it. She was already out of school by that time, quickly climbing up the ranks in Mom's security force. He didn't see her at school any more, of course, but she was always stopping by their place and he often went to go and see her as well. He thought she'd be pleased for him.

She wasn't.

She pointed out a lot of things to him that he hadn't realized. She asked Junior why his father wanted to get rid of him by sending him to a whole different country, even? Probably because his Dad was just jealous of his work. Maybe he thought Junior was better than he was and he didn't want Junior around competing with him. Junior tried to protest that it wasn't that at all, his Dad was really excited for him to go, but Kuvira started to cry and told him how much she'd miss him if he went. She kissed him, then. Kissed him a lot. Let him touch her breasts through her tunic. 

He told his father that he wanted to stay in Zaofu and study independently. His father was confused at this sudden change of heart; he tried to argue with Junior that University was where he should be and they had their first big fight.

His mother was furious with him as well, and they had a big old blowout fight. Well, it wasn't the first time he'd ever had a fight with his mother. He and Mom had blown up with each other before. But Dad, though...he'd never fought with Dad before.

After he and Mom had yelled it all out he'd gone outside to take a walk and came across Huan.

"Why don't you want to go?" Huan asked. He'd been letting his hair grow lately, and often hid behind it.

Junior shrugged. "I can always go later. It's not a big deal."

"But you wanted to go yesterday. Why is today different?"

"Lay off, Huan! People change their minds sometimes, you know. Just because you never do doesn't mean the rest of us don't!" He shoved his glasses up his nose and glared.

"But why is today different?" Huan was relentless, as usual.

"I said lay off! It's no big deal!"

Huan stared at the ground. "Did Kuvira tell you to say it?"

"What? No! I made up my own mind. Kuvira had nothing to do with it!"

"You're lying," Huan whispered, his face pinching up the way it did when he was about to throw one of his fits. "Your heart goes boom boom fast and lies go out the mouth."

Junior grabbed him by the front of his tunic and then shoved him aside. "Shut the fuck up! Why do you always have to be such a fucking freak all the time! You're an embarrassment, you know that?"

Huan clutched at his chest and looked up at Junior. His eyes were so hurt, so full of hurt, and Junior felt awful. He knew Huan couldn't help the way he was, knew he didn't do the things he did on purpose. He opened his mouth to say something but then Opal came flying up the path, practically vibrating with fury.

"Don't you talk to him that way! What's wrong with you! You're such an asshole, Junior!" She stood in front of Huan, little sister gone all fierce and protective.

Junior threw up his hands. "Whatever." He walked away and kept walking until he got to Kuvira's place. He told her that he had refused his father. She kissed him some more, and let him put his hand inside her tunic.

"I couldn't take it if you left me," she said, and he couldn't believe his luck that Kuvira - Kuvira! - cared about him that much.

*********************

 

Baatar got called in to see the Warden. She told him that since his stay there had been exemplary that they were considering giving him time off for good behavior. She droned on about the Prison Board's belief that he was no longer a danger to society, he had paid for his crimes, he was rehabilitated, same shit, different day. Of course he nodded earnestly. Of course he said the right things. They'd have him in front of the Board in two weeks and if the Board was convinced then he'd be free to go.

If the concern was that he was going to building any more war machines, well, he could reassure them. He wasn't going to be doing that. Not for anyone. He was done with all of that. He just wanted to be able to walk wherever he wanted to walk and to be left the fuck alone. Had he paid for his crimes? No. But then again, he knew he never would be able to pay enough. Never. He'd never make it right.

Later that week Opal came to visit. The only regular visitor he had was his Aunt Lin; she was never happy to be there and she clearly thought he was shit under her shoes. He loathed her visits, she was such a fucking self-righteous bitch. He knew Wei was living in Republic City - the prisoners never missed a pro-bending match on the radio and Wei was earthbending for the Zaofu Zorillas team - but after a few times that ended up in the two of them damn near killing each other Wei stopped coming to visit. Wing was busy with his life in Zaofu but he wrote a few times a year. His parents came up to visit, but he couldn't bear to see his father's disappointed face. Oh, his mother was disappointed too, but he could handle her. Dad, though? He couldn't even think of Dad.

Opal had finally gotten married, about a month or so prior. She had the two little boys now and there was no hiding under that ridiculous damn wingsuit that there was another one coming at any given moment. He had no idea why it had taken her and Bolin so long to get married. Bolin. Spirits. He would have really thought Opal could have done better than Bolin, but who was he to fucking talk? Bolin had never hurt a fucking spider wasp. Baatar had blood all over his hands. So who was the catch here and who was the loser? Yeah. Everybody knew.

Opal told him about the wedding; offered to show him photograph of the family. Spirits. It was the first time he'd seen Wing's wife. She was short and plump and very pretty, as were their little girls. Aunt Lin was actually laughing - who would have thought it? - and had her arms around some man who was clearly from the Fire Nation; based on the photo they were pretty close. She'd never mentioned anything about him during her visits, but why would she? He also saw Mako with Prince Wu. Or just Wu, now. He'd heard about them, too. Mako had a little girl in his arms and there were two other children with them. Wei was there, big grin on his face. His parents looked peaceful and happy. Opal looked beautiful; Bolin looked gobsmacked (although in his experience Bolin usually looked like that). He knew about their little boys but had never seen them. The older one looked just like his father; the younger one looked a lot like Mom, actually. Huan was standing there in a modern suit, hair all grown out from where it had been shaved all those years ago. He had it all piled up on his head. He wasn't looking at the camera but he was actually smiling. Baatar couldn't remember the last time he'd seen him smile. Standing next to him was a tall woman in a very sleek dress, her hair cut short, airbender tattoos. She was a total knockout. Was she one of Tenzin's kids? One of the new airbenders? He pointed at her and asked Opal; she confirmed that it was Tenzin's younger daughter, Ikki. Shit! Wasn't she like ten years old or something? Obviously not any longer. Opal told him that Huan was with Ikki up at the Northern Air Temple doing fuckall knows what.

Everyone looked happy. A big happy family. No room now for him.

He didn't tell Opal about the potential early release.

He didn't tell her about the fountain, either. In fact, he hadn't touched the plans since he'd stashed them under his bed.

As usual, Baatar didn't say anything at all.

 

**********************

The last really good day Junior remembered in Zaofu was a few weeks before Opal woke up an airbender. Mom had packed an enormous picnic basket and they'd taken the jeep and driven out into the countryside, just the family. Mom and Dad had polished off a bottle or two of wine (Junior was the designated driver) and were laying together on a blanket under a tree. Wing and Wei were playing an impromptu game of power disc. Huan was sketching but also occasionally reaching out with a finger to send the disc into strange and wobbly orbits around trees or straight up into the sky, much to the amusement of the twins (and Huan, who was laughing one of his rare laughs). Opal had gotten the idea into her head that she wanted to learn how to knit and made Junior help her wind the yarn up around his hands while she fumbled with the needles. They talked about his latest project and how Opal wasn't sure yet what she wanted to do with herself and her future.

Later they made a campfire and sang around it and tried to roast sausages (Wing managed to drop three of them into the fire; Huan took such a long time with his first sausage trying to get each side roasted perfectly that Wei tried to steal his other sausages and was only stopped by their mother's glare) and after dinner all five of the Beifong children stripped down to their swimsuits and flailed around in the nearby lake, leaving their parents to canoodle on the blanket again. Junior drove home in the summer moonlight while Wei and Wing fell asleep on top of Huan all the way in the back and Opal snuggled up to Mom in the back seat. Dad sat in the passenger seat and every time Junior glanced over Dad was smiling at him.

********************

It all changed after Opal became an airbender. Opal left Zaofu. The Avatar came and the Red Lotus attacked Zaofu and his mother was on a rampage about it. Aiwei had betrayed her, Kuvira hadn't done her job as chief of security, there was a great lava pit in the middle of the city that needed to be dealt with. Not to mention Mom and Aunt Lin had had it out. Junior missed that particular fight, though, he was over at Kuvira's place at the time.

Mom and Kuvira and half the security force left for the Northern Air Temple and Mom came home distraught at Korra's injuries and worried about letting Opal stay with the airbenders. Kuvira, on the other hand, was full of how she'd saved the life of the Avatar's father, the Chief of the Southern Water Tribe. That being said, she was also infuriated that Mom had made her stay with the injured instead of joining the rest of them in the temple.

"That little princess, Asami Sato, she was good enough to go in there, but not me! That stuck up bitch! I can't believe Su made me stay behind!" She couldn't let it go. After a while Junior tuned her out. She got like that sometimes. She really hated it if she thought anybody was discounting her for any reason. He just kept working on his push-ups. Kuvira had been talking a lot lately about how buffed up a lot of the security force was and Junior had taken it to heart. Of course she never said anything directly to him - Kuvira wasn't like that, she didn't care how he looked, she loved him for who he was - but she had a point, it wouldn't kill him to work out every once in awhile. Like Kuvira said, just because someone wasn't a bender it didn't mean they couldn't work out.

She was ranting on and he just kept working, switching into crunches. Oh, the crunches were killing him, he could hardly manage to do even five of them. He was trying to distract himself by thinking of his latest project when suddenly Kuvira was standing over him. 

"Did you hear what I said?" she demanded. 

"No, I was thinking of something else, sorry," he managed to push out between crunches.

Kuvira's face went still. In retrospect, of course, he should have realized, he should have understood that him saying that was going to make her even more angry. It was his fault, really, he wasn't being very supportive of her. She had the right to be angry, she was the head of security, right? She was good at her job. His Mom was really showing her a lack of respect by blaming her for what happened with the Red Lotus. Obviously it was on Aiwei, what happened, but you'd never know it the way Mom was laying into Kuvira.

Still, he was taken by surprise when she bent the floor up, slamming into his back and throwing him across the room. He grunted with pain and curled up. 

"Oh, am I boring you?" Kuvira's tone was cold.

"No!" He managed to say past the pain in his spine. "I'm sorry! I just got distracted. I didn't mean it!"

"Because I'd really hate to bore you. Not that it would be difficult. Sometimes you really are a fucking moron, _Junior_. I don't know what I see in you." Metal wrapped itself around his torso and squeezed.

"I can't...please!" He was starting to gasp for breath. "Please!" His vision started to go black around the edges.

Suddenly the pressure eased and Kuvira was there on the floor with him, her arms around him.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I lost it for a minute there. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it, it's just you know, it's so hard when your parents don't give me the respect I deserve just because I'm not a Beifong. It's so hard for me when I hear it coming from your mouth, too, I just can't keep it together. I love you so much, it just hurts when it comes from you as well. You can understand that, right?"

He managed a nod. "Sorry," he grunted out, and she kissed him.

"I know you are," she said. "This will never happen again. I love you, so much."

She'd told him before that it wouldn't happen again but it had. It had. The thing is, he knew it was his fault, really. He needed to be more understanding of her. He needed to be more thoughtful with his words, he knew that she had a bit of a temper. If he was more careful with his words then he wouldn't set her off.

She kissed him again. "Have I told you lately how amazing you are? I don't know what I would do without you. There's nobody else like you, not anywhere. And you'll see. We'll both get the respect we deserve, Baatar. Both of us. Your mother won't keep holding me back and your father won't hold you back any longer, we're going to change things together. Be the kind of Beifongs people will respect, give the Metal Clan the recognition it deserves. Zaofu is the real city of the future and we're going to make that happen, you and me, together."

She loved him. He knew she did. She was the one who told him how brilliant he was, how he deserved to get out from his father's shadow. She was the only one who would call him Baatar instead of that spirits-damned Junior. She understood that he was tired of being treated like a kid all of the time. She _knew_ him.

He was stiff and sore the next day and let out with a shout of pain when Wei accidentally banged into him at dinner. His mother asked him, with sharp concern, what had happened. He told her that he slipped on the tiles outside his workshop and had taken a tumble; she asked if he needed a healer but he demurred. Wing made some crack about being clumsy and he made some retort and everyone just laughed it off.

Everyone but Huan, that is. Huan was staring at him from across the table; had been staring at him since he said that he had slipped. 

After dinner Huan caught up with him.

"Why did you lie to Mom? About falling down?"

Junior snorted his annoyance. "So what, you're a truth seer now that Aiwei is gone?"

Huan didn't answer, just kept staring at him.

"Just drop it," Junior said. "I'm fine. It barely hurts." He walked away.

"Liar," Huan whispered from behind him. 

Junior didn't say anything at all.

********************

It was so good in the beginning. Things were tense with Mom and Dad when they first left Zaofu, true. Dad was hurt and didn't understand why it was that Baatar felt like he needed to go his own way and Mom, as always, was furious at the very idea that she wasn't going to be instantly obeyed when she forbade them both from leaving. They were both adults, though, even if his parents still saw him as a child. He was sorry they left on such bad terms but it didn't change anything. Kuvira was phenomenal. She went into Ba Sing Se and deployed forces and stopped the wholesale destruction that was happening there. She gave him free reign to work on his projects. Bolin joined them and while Baatar was pretty convinced he was a moron of the first order, Kuvira was right that Bolin was amazing with people. He could really work a crowd. People loved him. Kuvira told Baatar that part of being a good leader, a leader that people would follow was to gather the right people around you. Like Varrick, for example. Varrick was a weird little fucker, but he was also undeniably brilliant. It hurt Baatar when Kuvira gave him projects instead of Baatar, but Kuvira explained to him that it wasn't about Baatar not being good enough; it was just about playing up to people's strengths. He understood. Her need - the Earth Empire's need! - for Varrick's genius was so much more important that Baatar's personal feelings.

As time went on he really wanted Kuvira to see him as her core of strength, to understand that she was his first priority. He pushed his body until she was pleased with his new muscle development. He backed her up, no matter what. He did whatever she asked of him. Sometimes he wasn't all that sure of what she wanted - he was pretty sure that the re-education camps were not the best idea, but she told him that he needed to trust her, and that even more importantly she needed to trust in him and his unwavering support. So he gave his support. He made damn sure that he supported her publicly. He jokingly told her one day that he was her number one fanboy and she loved that, she laughed and laughed and kissed him all over for that one.

Sometimes he wasn't very supportive. Sometimes that made her angry. Things were very stressful for her, he knew. Those were the times when he needed to step up, show her that no matter what, he was on her side. She didn't need Baatar to add to her stress. 

He knew she loved him, though, even when that love hurt a little bit. She loved him. She did. He understood that she didn't really have much time for intimacy any longer. Like she told him once night when he tried to coax her into sleeping with him, the stability of the Empire was more important than Baatar getting off. She was right. He was being selfish.

She was so happy when he asked her to marry him, though. So happy. It had been so long since he'd seen her smile like that, like the old Kuvira. It was like he had the old Kuvira back, not the Great Uniter. She made love to him that night, her hair down around her shoulders, and he didn't have to share her with anyone else. It was so perfect, that night. Everything was so perfect. He loved her so much.

It started to go wrong - really wrong - when they finally made their way back to Zaofu. His mother was being his mother, she refused to back down, tried to defy Kuvira. And then, spirits damn it, she took Wing and Wei with her to try to attack Kuvira personally! Dragging the twins into it like that! What did she think was going to happen? What did she expect _him_ to do about it? It was Mom's fault for breaking Kuvira's peace accord! She was so stubborn, his mother, always convinced she was right about everything. Always convinced that she knew what was best for everyone.

Spirits, and then his father and Huan refused to bow to her. Didn't they understand? Kuvira was under so much stress, she was going to take that kind of thing personally.

Arrangements were made to transport his family over to a suspended wooden cell Kuvira had ordered set up for them. Mom and the twins were kept in the restraints; Dad wasn't an issue, he was handcuffed with platinum and walked alongside Mom's restraints, head down. He refused to look at Baatar. Like it was his fault! Kuvira had made it very clear that anyone bowing to her would be treated fairly. Dad made his own choice by not bowing.

He stood there in front of them. Wing had his head down, trying not to cry. Wei glared at him, all defiance. Mom looked frightened when she asked him about Huan. "Junior! Where's Huan? We haven't seen him since he was taken away from your father last night. Where is he?"

"Don't call me Junior! How many times do I have to tell you!"

The thing was...he was a little frightened as well. He had no idea where Huan was. He walked away from his family, grabbing at a few people to ask about his brother's location. No one seemed to know. It was with reluctant steps that he made his way to his and Kuvira's private train car. He crept in quietly, afraid of what he might find.

It was bad. Oh spirits. It was bad.

Huan was on his back, splayed across the table, held down by bands of metal at his wrists and ankles. Kuvira was leaning over him. Huan was shaking, eyes blinking frantically, hands fluttering past their restraints.

"Just say it, freak," Kuvira was saying, her voice utterly calm. " _I am a waste of time._ Just say it. You know it's true, don't you? So just say it."

Huan said nothing. Baatar wasn't even sure if he could, at this point. When Huan got this upset he usually wasn't able to get any words out at all.

"Come on now, Mommy and Daddy and Grandma aren't here for you. No one is going to help you. Just say it, and I'll let you go. Or maybe you want to try to fight me, hmm? Bend out of those restraints? Come on, you're the one who is supposed to be the world's best bender. So bend! Come on, bend!"

Kuvira drew up one fist and slammed it into Huan's abdomen. His breath forced out in a whistled shriek and after a long moment of silence he started sucking frantically for air. His nostrils were white and pinched and his lips started to turn blue around the edges. Suddenly he started to vomit. The vomit had nowhere to go and he started to choke on it.

"Oh, that tastes bad, doesn't it? You know, you could choke to death if you weren't careful," Kuvira said, just like she was discussing the weather. Huan continued to choke.

Baatar couldn't take it any longer. "You'll kill him," he blurted out, stepping all the way into the car. 

Kuvira deliberately turned Huan's head and shook it by fisting her hand into his long hair, the vomit splattering onto the floor. Huan coughed the rest of the vomit out desperately, gagging and sobbing for breath. She flicked her hand casually and the floor wrenched up, catching Baatar up and slamming him into the wall, the entire car rocking slightly with the force of his impact. Baatar groaned as he slid down. 

"What did you say?" Kuvira asked, with that strange little triumphant smile she got on her face when she was about to hurt someone. Spirits he was so afraid of that smile, so afraid of it.

"You'll kill him," Baatar managed to gasp out around the pain. Huan's eyes were open now, and he was staring at his brother. "Please don't kill him. Please. I'm begging you. Please."

"You're begging me? _Begging_ me? Why would you need to beg? Are you trying to say that I am some kind of monster that needs to be begged for something? Is that what you're saying, you stupid little fuck?" A screech of metal and his ribcage was enclosed. Kuvira turned back to Huan, looking down at him dispassionately. "This could have all been avoided if your family had just been reasonable," she said. "How many times do I need to ask? I am a compassionate person. I would have been willing to grant mercy."

Huan wasn't looking at her. He was looking at Baatar. He was terrified; his pupils were so large that there was hardly any green left and his face was covered with vomit, it was stuck in his hair as well. He was trembling so violently that Baatar could hear the faint drumming of his heels on the metal table.

Kuvira sighed. "I'm not going to kill anybody, Baatar. I thought you knew me better than that, but obviously not. Obviously you just think I'm some sort of a monster. Of course there's no getting around the fact that your family needs to be punished. They've done wrong, and wrongdoing needs punishment. Everyone knows that." Her hands moved again and the crushing weight was lifted off of Baatar's ribs. He fell forward, heaving. "But I'm not a monster. It hurts me, you know. To have you think such things of me. I thought I could depend on you. You can always depend on me, you know. Always. That's how much I love you, even though you obviously don't love me."

Baatar nodded. "I'm sorry," he managed to get out. "You can depend on me, I promise. I swear it. I do love you, I do. I'm sorry."

Another flick of her fingers and the restraints around Huan were gone. Kuvira walked past Baatar and smoothed out the floor and the slight indentation his body had made into the wall. She opened the door to the next car and called out. One of her personal staff entered, saluting. Kuvira pointed at Huan. "Clean him up before taking him to the rest of his family."

"Yes, Great Uniter!"

Kuvira didn't even bother to look over at Baatar. "Come on, Baatar." She walked into the next car, not even waiting to see if he would follow her. She knew he would.

Baatar struggled to stand up, clutching gingerly at his ribs. He glanced at his brother. Huan was no longer looking at him in terror; instead, there was pity in his eyes. Pity! Why the fuck would he need Huan's pity! He had everything! He had the woman he loved, he had his work, and he had Zaofu. He was going to build something the likes that the world had never seen. Something that would make sure no one would ever forget who he was. Ever.

"She's right, you know. You _are_ just a waste of time," he threw out, but Huan's look didn't change.

*********************

Sometimes, in his dreams, he still saw the look of terror that Huan had given him, bruised and beaten, covered in his own vomit, laying on top of the table that Baatar and Kuvira had eaten a thousand meals off of. Kuvira probably would have killed Huan if he hadn't come in. No. Scratch probably. She would have. She would have killed Huan, dumped his corpse in a ditch somewhere and moved on. Who knows what she would have done with the rest of the family if Opal and Aunt Lin and Grandma hadn't come for them.

She would have killed Baatar that day in Republic City, that's for fucking certain. Killed him and never looked back. Spirits knew that's why she aimed and fired. Had she ever loved him? He didn't know and the pain it caused was relentless, even ten years later. Not that he was worthy of love, anyhow. He knew who he was. What he was. Shit. That's all he ever was and it's all he ever would be. Pure and utter shit. His entire legacy was pain and death and destruction.

No wonder Huan looked at him with such pity in his eyes. Oh spirits, Huan. Huan. 

********************

That night in Zaofu was the last time he'd seen Huan. He never went to see his family when they were imprisoned and only caught a glimpse of them as they all escaped on Juicy. Later, during his trial in Republic City the rest of his family (except Grandma Toph) had shown up every single day. His father had cried when the sentence was read out; his mother had looked weary and so very sad. Aunt Lin had put her arms around his mother and had spoken to her quietly; Wing and Wei had their arms around Dad and Bolin held Opal's hand tightly, just like he had every day at the trial. No Huan, though. No Huan at all.

He went before the Prison Board. He said the right things; played the game. They moved to release him early based on good behavior. What a joke.

He told no one he was being released.

He had money coming to him when he left the prison; what pittance he'd earned working in the machine shop but also money his family had given him over the years in order to buy things he wanted or needed. He'd never spent any of it. He exchanged his prison tunic and trousers for the suit that he'd worn throughout the trial ten years ago; it didn't fit him well any longer but it was at least enough to cover him. He made his way to the nearest mall and bought a pair of good quality boots as well as a few articles of plain but well-made clothing. Winter gear as well. It was all stowed in a knapsack - along with a sleeping bag and some other necessities - that had a leather loop on the outside that he could use to tie up the tube with the plans inside.

He bought a pen and some basic drafting tools. A notebook. It all went into the knapsack.

He left the suit and shoes in a dumpster. The Baatar who had worn them was gone now. He was never coming back.

His hair was down past his shoulders and he had a beard but he left it. He had no idea if anyone would know who he was ten years later but he didn't want to be recognized. He pulled his hair back into a ponytail in the toilet of the restaurant where he'd eaten and gotten changed and realized that there was grey at his temples. He was only thirty-two. Well. That's what prison would do to you. Right?

He walked all the way across the city to the train station and up to the ticket counter.

"Where to?" the woman behind the counter asked him.

"I need to get to the Northern Air Temple," he told the woman, and she stared at him.

"Uh...we don't really have a train that goes there. You do know it's been destroyed, right?"

"Just get me as close as you can."

The woman pulled out a series of maps and started to peruse them, looking to see how close she could get him. "I think we can at least get you to the foot of the mountains up there. So the Northern Air Temple, hmm? We don't get many requests for that destination, for sure. Tourist thing?"

Baatar shifted the knapsack on his shoulders. "I have a fountain to build," he said. 


	3. That's What We Came Here For: Wei Beifong

184 AG, Republic City  
Wei Beifong

 

He blew a jet of smoke out of his nostrils before taking another hit off the bottle he was holding. Sake. Cheap sake. The part of his brain that was still even minutely sober knew he was going to have a hangover to beat all hangovers the next morning, but he didn't care. He pitched the still smoldering cigarette onto the pavement and then leaned back against the brick of the wall outside of Big Sal's. He was dimly aware of the girl in furs that was hanging off of him, plucking at the button on his pants. He tried to bat her away but she was insistent with the damn thing. He closed his eyes and drank again. Fuck it. Fuck all of it. Whatever.

He heard the girl squawk an indignant, "Hey!" before hearing a familiar gruff voice. 

"Go on, then. Go on, get. Nobody needs you here."

"We're busy, for your information!"

That little gritted out laugh. "Ain't gonna get busy here, girlie. Or didja just think there was nothin' goin' on down there just cause he's shitfaced? You ain't his type." 

"Oh, and I suppose you are?"

"I ain't nobody's type. Now scram before I _make_ you scram."

The girl left. Whether she left on her own steam or whether or not she got a little extra impetus, Wei didn't know. He opened his eyes to see Qi with arms crossed, glaring at him.

"Hey, Qi," he managed, swaying a little on his feet.

"Thought I'd find you here. Come on. Get in the car."

"I don't want to," he said petulantly. "Don't want to go anywhere."

Qi sighed. "Just get in. I don't want to carry you, you're too heavy."

Wei offered the bottle. "Have a little drink with me. I did something bad."

Qi's look mixed pity and fond exasperation. "Yeah, I figured that might have happened. That's why I came lookin' for you. Come on. I'm gonna take you home."

Wei started to sob. "I don't wanna go home. Don't. Take me to your place."

Qi's head shook an emphatic no. "You want the kids to see you like this? That what you want? We're not going back to my place."

"No. No. They're really good kids, aren't they? Everybody has good kids. Wu has good kids. Wing has good kids. Opal has good kids." The sobs were coming in earnest now.

Qi sighed again and took the bottle out of his hand. "Shit, you're really gone. Come on, big boy. Let's go." Qi slid under his arm and staggered a bit before hauling him over to Wu's Satomobile. "Fucking earthbender. I swear you weigh twice as much as me." Qi managed to get the back door open and using both hands as well as a few well-aimed kicks shoved Wei into the back seat. Qi dropped a paper bag on top of him. "You need to puke, you tell me to pull over or do it in there, I don't wanna be scrubbin' out this car all day tomorrow, you hear me?"

Wei answered that with a sob. Qi got behind the wheel and threw the car into gear, pulling out into the street.

"We're friends, right, Qi?" Wei tried to sit up but mostly failed.

"Yeah, we're friends."

"I'm not a bad guy, am I?"

Qi met his eyes in the rearview mirror. "You're a good guy. Just making dumb choices tonight, obviously."

"I'm lovable, right? Right?"

Qi raised one eyebrow. "Sure."

Wei tried to expound on this theory. With difficulty. "So why can't I be the good twin?"

"Bein' the good twin's overrated, I guess." Qi spun the wheel and the car turned smoothly.

"You don't love me!"

Qi kept driving. "I came to get you, didn't I? Don't see nobody else in this piece of shit town draggin' your drunk ass home."

"I'm not a good boy and that's why he doesn't love me. I know it. Everybody knows it." This brought on fresh sobs.

Qi sighed. "Spirits, I knew it was gonna come down to him. What'd you go and do?"

"Oh shit, I'm gonna puke!"

The car pulled over quickly.

 

********************

Opal wasn't the only one who thought that the guy who played Nuktuk was cute. Wei was only thirteen when those movers first came out but he was old enough to know that Nuktuk made his stomach clench up. He was handsome; he was heroic; he had an amazing body. Nobody was walking around Zaofu dressed like that! It got him so worked up that he had to make some dumb excuse as to why he couldn't just get up and leave his seat in the theater when the mover was over.

He told Wing about it later that night under the cover of semi-darkness in their bedroom.

"I guess he's okay looking," Wing said doubtfully.

"He's the best," said Wei. "I really like him. I mean, if I could choose anyone to be my boyfriend, he'd look like that."

"How come?" asked Wing. He'd crawled over to sit on the foot of Wei's bed. Mom had offered them separate bedrooms but they didn't want them. Wei wasn't even sure if he could sleep in a bedroom without Wing in it.

"I dunno. He's got that big chest and everything. All those muscles. I wonder what color eyes he has?"

"Well, if he was really a waterbender they'd be blue, right?" Wing said slowly. "But I don't think he is. He's not dark like waterbenders, is he?"

"Nuh uh."

"Hey, I think Opal has a magazine with him in it. Like the magazine talked to him or something and then printed it."

"She does?"

"Yeah, she had it the other day, she had it stuck inside another book so no one could see but I peeked."

"Opal! Nice one!" Wei grinned and Wing grinned back, matching smiles.

"Maybe it says in the magazine."

"How do I get it, though?"

"I dunno."

Their door opened and Huan stuck his head in. "Hey. Are you going to talk all night? Too much noise, my ears can't let my head sleep." Huan was frowning.

"Sorry, Huan. We were talking about the mover," Wing said.

Huan came in and closed the door behind him, coming to sit on Wei's bed next to Wing. 

"Was it good?" Huan wanted to know.

"Yeah! It was good! Like this girl got kidnapped and stuff and there was a chase and then this Nuktuk came and saved her!" Wei gushed. "It was amazing! You gotta see it!"

"I will when there aren't so many people sitting there," said Huan. Huan didn't like big crowds and there was always a big crowd on the opening nights.

"Wei thinks that Nuktuk is really cute," said Wing.

Huan thought about this for a moment. "Opal has his picture. She thinks he's cute too. I don't think he's cute." Huan waved his hands around. "Everything's too much. Too big."

"Well, I like it," said Wei. "That he's all big, I mean."

Huan nodded at this.

"I don't know what color eyes he has, though," Wei added.

"Green," said Huan. "His name is Bolin, he also plays for the Fire Ferrets pro-bending team."

"Shut up!" said Wei.

Huan blinked. "Okay."

"No, sorry, I don't mean really shut up, that's just like a thing people say when they get surprised," Wei clarified.

"Ah, okay. When does it mean to really shut up, then?"

"When people yell it at you and are angry," said Wing.

"That's confusing," said Huan. "Sometimes Junior tells me to shut up."

"Yeah, Junior actually means he wants you to stop talking," Wing explained.

"Junior's an asshole sometimes," added Wei.

"Yeah," Huan agreed.

"How did you know all that stuff?" asked Wing. "About the Nuktuk guy?"

"Oh, I read Opal's magazine," Huan said. "The one she had hidden in her geography book."

"Shut up!" said Wei.

Huan looked over at Wing.

"That was just a surprised shut up," Wing said.

"Ah, okay. His name is Bolin, he is from Republic City and has green eyes and black hair and is seventeen years old and an earthbender and he plays for the Fire Ferrets. He is an orphan and has an older brother and he is friends with the Avatar." Huan said. "Oh, and the fire ferret's name is Pabu and is his pet. He likes to eat seaweed noodles and likes girls who smell nice and going for long walks on the beach. Or at least that's what the magazine article said."

They all sat for a moment, digesting this.

"He's the coolest guy in the world," said Wei, more than a little starstruck.

"Opal thinks so too," said Huan.

 

******************** 

Wei didn't remember getting home. He had no memory of Qi getting him into his flat; no memory of Qi managing to get his shoes off and rolling him onto his bed. He woke up with a head like glass, feeling like a badgermole had shit in his mouth. He groaned and even that hurt.

"Rise and shine, gorgeous," came Qi's amused voice.

"Kill me. Just kill me now." Spirits, he felt awful.

"You'd probably feel better if I did."

"What time is it?" Wei debated opening his eyes again. He did so; he regretted it instantly.

"Two o'clock in the afternoon," said Qi.

"Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit," moaned Wei. 

"I got somethin' for you. LoLo swears by it." Qi waved a mug under Wei's nose.

"Fucking LoLo."

"LoLo knows from a hangover. His younger days at sea and all."

"It's going to taste bad, I know it."

"Just drink it and quitcher cryin'. Big baby."

"Fuck you, Qi. Some friend you are." Wei took a deep breath, sat up, grabbed the mug out of Qi's hand, and swallowed it down. "OH SHIT!"

Qi was making that funny little rusty noise that was Qi's version of a laugh. "Ah, your face!"

"What in the ever lovin' fuck was in that thing?"

"You really want to know?"

"Oh spirits, I'm going to puke again." Wei staggered into the bathroom.

"Take a shower while you're in there, you smell like a skunk bear's ass."

 

********************

Wei definitely didn't like girls. Well, he liked girls, but he didn't  _like_  like girls. Wing, on the other hand, really liked girls, although he got all shy and couldn't actually do anything but sort of stare at the ground and mumble at a girl he thought was pretty, it was kind of funny. Well, funny for Wei, not really very funny for Wing. Mom said it was a good thing they liked who they liked because there would be less drama if they never had a crush on the same person. Leave it to Mom to put it that way.

Wei played it cool when the Avatar and everyone else showed up at Zaofu to take Opal away to train as an airbender. Super cool. That Bolin guy was even better looking in person. Didn't even notice Wei was alive, of course, since he was busy following Opal around. Not that Wei could blame him because hey, Opal was really pretty and she was the best. Seriously. Some guys didn't like their sisters, but he loved Opal. Well, for that matter he loved Huan, too. Not everybody really got Huan - lots of people thought he was weird and kids at school weren't always very nice to him, although if he and Wing heard about it they made sure that they put an end to that shit right then and there - but Huan was great. 

He loved Junior, too, but not when Junior was being a dick, which was more and more lately. Mom said that Junior was just having growing pains but whatever. Growing into a big dick pains, more like it.

It went without saying that he loved Wing. That was just a given. Wing was Wing. That's just how it was. Loving Wing was like breathing. Wing was his mirror. Only better, of course.

Still, though. He wouldn't have minded it if that Bolin had followed _him_ around. Not that he could tell Wei apart from Wing, he kept mixing them up. All of them - Bolin and his brother and that tall girl that was there, Asami - they pretty much just ignored the twins. The Avatar, though - Korra, her name was Korra - she was super friendly and nice, not at all what you'd think an Avatar would be like. Not that he knew what an Avatar would be like, but Mom did, she had known Avatar Aang pretty well. (Mom was kind of famous, which was great and all but she still made him clean his room and yelled at him when he forgot to do his homework. So much for being famous.)

Mom said she'd teach Korra metalbending and Korra got it just like that, it must be so amazing to be the Avatar! Mom sent them to spar with Korra and Bolin and Wing immediately went to spar with Korra, leaving Bolin to Wei. (Wing was the _best_.) Oh, he played it like he didn't care, like he would rather be sparring with Korra, but his heart rate was soaring when he was bending at Bolin. 

He was cool. He was cool. He totally played it like he didn't care, like he didn't even want to be sparring with Bolin. He was super cool. Well, okay, probably Aiwei could tell he wasn't cool, but fuck that guy, he wasn't even there. Everybody else, he was sure they couldn't tell that all he wanted to do was stand really close to Bolin. Who really sucked at metalbending, by the way, but well, can't have everything.

Wei saved the rock that Bolin smacked him upside the head with, though. He didn't tell anybody. Not even Wing, even though he knew that Wing wouldn't make fun. He just didn't want to share.

He was happy for Opal that she got the airbending and that she was going to learn how to use it but it felt like their family had a huge hole in it when she left. Huan was so upset when she left that Wei and Wing heard him crying in his room next door really late one night and Huan hardly ever cried about  _anything_. Even Junior talked about how much he missed Opal. Dad was sad, too. Mom tried to put on a good show like she always did but Wei caught her in Opal's room one afternoon, sitting on Opal's bed, her face in her hands. They all missed Opal.

He wasn't at all sure about Aunt Lin, either. Mom had talked about her forever! She was really grouchy and nice at the same time. Sort of like Mom, really. At one point while she was there that first time she caught him trying to climb out of his bedroom window (he was thinking about trying to sneak a look into the bedroom where Bolin and his brother were sleeping) and she just stared at him for a really long time before saying, _Just like your mother._  Then she started laughing her ass off and didn't tell his parents about it at all! Adults were crazy.

He and Wing helped to save the Avatar from those Red Lotus people that invaded Zaofu. Mom went on a rampage about the whole thing, though. She was so pissed off about the lava pit in the middle of everything and Aiwei's betrayal, she went on and on about it. Aunt Lin said something later about how young Wei and Wing were to be involved in the city's security protocols but Mom got that pissed-off look she got on her face whenever anyone ever tried to say anything even remotely negative about any of her kids and told Aunt Lin that he and Wing were Beifongs and that Aunt Lin of all people should know that age didn't mean shit when it came to how capable a Beifong was. Wei thought Aunt Lin might get mad right back but instead she laughed and hugged Mom and told Mom that she was a far better mother than Grandma had ever been. Which made Mom cry! Mom never cried! 

Mom left with Aunt Lin and Kuvira and part of the security force to help Korra and the airbenders when the Red Lotus attacked the Northern Air Temple. Spirits, Wei was mad though, he assumed that he and Wing would be going along as well but Mom said no! She said that it was bad enough that Opal was in such danger, she wasn't risking another child under any circumstances. Wei tried to argue but Dad took him by the shoulder and steered him out of Mom's office. 

Poor Dad, though. He did what he always did when anything got a little hairy, he just paced and paced, waiting for Mom to radio so he knew what was going on. Wing and Huan sat with him in Mom's office, waiting and waiting and waiting. Wei couldn't just sit there, though - he wasn't made to sit around and wait for anything, so he kicked things around Mom's office until Dad finally told him to go outside and he went out and smacked some rocks around for awhile. When Mom finally radioed that she and Opal were safe Dad sat right down and started shaking. Huan put his head on Dad's shoulder and Wing hugged him from the other side. Wei, though, he just went back outside and broke things to relieve his feelings about it. Those Red Lotus people, they were bad news. Even Mom was afraid of them and Mom was never afraid of _anything_. Wei wasn't sorry to hear they were all gone (well, except for the guy they put back in prison). 

When Mom got home she told Dad all about it (Wei and Wing eavesdropped, of course). Turned out that Bolin couldn't metalbend, but he could lavabend. SPIRITS.

Wei spent a lot of quality time thinking about Bolin lavabending. _A lot._

It wasn't very long after Mom got back that Junior and Kuvira left. He didn't care so much about Kuvira, but the whole Junior thing was just bad. Mom was furious, Dad was so sad, all of these people left Zaofu to go with Kuvira including the family who had the house closest to their compound. Like two kids from their class from school were just gone the next day. Just like that. It was weird and everyone was sad and he didn't know what to do to fix any of it. Wing, he was extra good, he made sure that he tried to help Mom and Dad out as much as he could but Wei? He didn't know how to be good like that. He ended up getting in a couple of big fights with Mom over stupid stuff that didn't even matter until even Dad lost his patience and yelled at him and Dad hardly ever yelled about anything.

He didn't want to fight. He wanted to be good like Wing but he always just fucked it up when he tried.

He missed Opal. So did Wing, and Huan? Huan really missed her. Huan missed Junior, too. Huan didn't like it when things changed. At least Opal came to visit, though, which is more than could be said for fucking Junior. After awhile she came with her own air bison, Juicy. Juicy had green goo always coming out of his nose, but even still. Air bison! His own sister had an air bison! Spirits! Juicy was really friendly and Opal gave him and Wing flying lessons and everyone in Zaofu could just suck that, couldn't they? 

Bolin joined up with Junior and Kuvira. Mom was really pissed at that, too, although not really at Bolin. _Like giving a toddler a katana and sending him into the world,_  she said. _Damn Kuvira. Like that boy has the first idea what's really going on there._  Mom tried to talk Opal down about it - she kept telling Opal that Bolin didn't have enough life experience and sophistication to understand what Kuvira was really up to and that Kuvira was using him - but Opal was still pretty pissed off at him.

He was pissed off at Bolin as well. 

Still didn't stop him from thinking about him pretty much every night.

 

More and more reports started coming in about what Kuvira and Junior were doing. Mom took an airship up to Republic City to talk about it with some of the other world leader types. She took Wei and Wing with her and the second night they were there Aunt Lin and Mako took them to a pro-bending match.

Pro-bending! Wei had never seen anything like it. _Nothing_ like it. He felt like every single part of him was covered in electricity. The crowds screaming, how fast the benders were! How powerful! After the match he was just blathering on, he was so excited about it and Mako offered to take him in back, give him a little tour. Wing and Aunt Lin went too, although Wing wasn't nearly as excited as he was. Aunt Lin sighed a lot and rolled her eyes but Wei didn't care. When they got back to the Four Elements that night he kept Wing awake talking about it until Mom came in and threatened to gag him if he didn't zip it and go to sleep.

He really wanted to talk to Mako about it the next day but he had a new job as a bodyguard for the Prince of the Earth Kingdom, of all weird things, so he wasn't available. He couldn't stop thinking about it, though, so finally he convinced Wing to go with him back down to the arena and just check it out. They snuck in a back door - what? Wei was good at sneaking into places where he was neither wanted nor needed and Wing always followed - and crept around looking at things. They got caught, though, and the guard who caught them chewed them out half-heartedly before escorting them out. By the put-upon expression on the guard's face it wasn't by any means the first time she'd done it, either. As they were leaving they walked past the training gym where there were two benders, sparring. One of them was earthbending and without thinking Wei broke away to dash over to watch.

"Aw, come on, don't make me have to collar you," sighed the guard.

Wei ignored her. "Hey! Hey, you're Jintao, right? From the Badgermoles! Hey, you know the way that waterbender kept getting up on your right side last night? You could stop that if you'd use a Wind Moves Earth defense. You'd have to adjust a little to use the discs instead of rocks but it would work!"

Jintao stared at him. "What the hell do you know about it?"

Wei just kept going. "Seriously, it would work!" He demonstrated the move on its own.

The waterbender in the room laughed. "Maybe you should pay attention to him, Jintao, you've gotten dropped into the brink more than once because of that move."

Jintao shot a glare at the waterbender before turning it back on Wei. "Fuck off."

Wei turned to the waterbender. "Hit me. With whatever that move is, that arc of water."

The waterbender raised his eyebrows. "I'll knock you on your ass, kid."

"You won't," said Wing, from his position by the door. He was grinning. He nudged the guard with his elbow. "Watch this."

The guard threw up her hands. "It's your funeral. Go on, Nokut. Get him good and wet so I can get these two out of here and finish my lunch."

Wei took a stance next to where the clay discs were situated. He looked at the waterbender and nodded. The waterbender nodded back and then an arc of water spiraled low and fast towards him. Wei dropped into a perfect Wind Moves Earth, body spinning as he sent three clay discs over on end, forming a shield that diverted the water in a flashy spray that drenched Jintao. The discs continued to spin on and slammed the waterbender in the chest. The waterbender went down with a grunt.

"AWESOME," shouted Wing.

"What the fuck was that?" asked the guard, her mouth dropping open.

"That, my friend, was Wind Moves Earth," grinned Wing.

Jintao was standing there, dripping wet, staring at Wei. "How _old_ are you?"

Wei and Wing exchanged glances. "Uh, I'm fourteen."

"And where did you learn Wind Moves Earth from?" asked a new voice. An old man entered the sparring room from behind Wing and the guard. "That's an advanced move."

"My mother taught me," said Wei.

The old man raised an eyebrow. "Your mother taught you." It was a statement, not a question.

Wei nodded. 

"And your mother is...?"

Wei stood up a little straighter. "Suyin Beifong."

There was a silence and then the waterbender started to laugh. "I just got knocked on my ass by a baby Beifong? Ah shit. I need a drink."

"What's your name?" the old man asked.

"Wei Beifong." Wei pointed. "That's my brother, Wing." Wing waved, a little uncertainly.

"I assume you're a metalbender as well?" the old man asked.

Wei nodded. "But I know you can't use that here."

The old man walked onto the training floor and looked at Jintao. "Fetch young Master Beifong here a helmet, would you?" 

Jintao shook his head but did as asked, buckling the helmet onto Wei's head. The older man waited patiently, and when Wei was ready, went into an earthbending stance.

"No metalbending."

Wei nodded, seriously.

"Okay. Show me what you've got." With that the old man sent a clay disc spinning Wei's way.

Wei fought hard. There was no faulting his training - he knew all of the traditional moves and he knew them well. His form was excellent, he knew that. But this old man had moves that Wei had never seen before, moves that most certainly were not traditional. At first Wei tried to counter the strikes coming at him with only traditional moves but then he relaxed into it and improvised a bit. By the time the old man signaled for him to stop Wei was sweaty, covered in bruises and bleeding in a few places.

He'd never felt better in his entire life.

The old man bowed to him deeply and Wei bowed back. He heard the sound of scattered applause and looked over to see his brother and the guard and even the waterbender clapping enthusiastically. His aunt was there as well and she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Not bad, kiddo," she said, and Wei was pretty sure that was a fairly high compliment coming from his Aunt Lin. She took a few steps forward. "Your mother couldn't find you two. I thought you might be over here."

The old man bowed to her as well. "Chief Beifong."

She nodded. "Toza."

Wait, Toza? THE Toza? He'd just been sparring with Toza, THE Toza of the Boar-q-pines? Spirits, he hoped he hadn't just made an ass of himself.

"I'm not going to comment on the traditional forms of a Beifong," the old man - Toza - said. "You're a Beifong, enough said. Pro-bending's about more than the traditional forms, though. You've got to be able to think on your feet, think fast, improvise and not only react but act. I assume you've never tried to spar that way before?"

Wei shook his head.

"Well. You've shown a lot of promise. Work on it and come on back here in a few years. You might just make a helluva pro-bender some day." With that the old man walked out of the gym. 

Wei floated all the way back to the Four Elements hotel. He didn't even care that Mom ripped him and Wing new ones for sneaking out on her.

Wei did work on his bending for the next two years. Constantly. He sparred with Wing, he sparred with various other benders in Zaofu. He spent time on his own practicing moves that he came up with in his head. He knew what he wanted. He had a goal. He was going to be the best earthbending pro-bender ever seen. 

 

Things got worse and worse in the Earth Kingdom until Junior and Kuvira came to Zaofu. That was a bad time. A really bad time. It was the first time that the whole family had been in one room together since Opal had left home and it was horrible. Kuvira making those shitty sneery faces like she always used to do whenever Mom wasn't around to see her and Junior acting like he was the king of the entire fucking world. Wei was one hundred percent ready to go after Kuvira with Mom but Wing didn't want to and they had one of their extremely rare fights about it. Wing ended up going with them but then Kuvira captured them. Wing was right, they should have waited and figured it out with Korra. It was that fucking Beifong temper, smack first, think later. Dad didn't want them to go either but Mom shot him down. Look what happened.

The worst part about the whole thing was that he could tell that Mom was scared. If _Mom_ was scared, then there was really something to be scared about. Not to mention that something was wrong with Huan. Huan had disappeared for hours, no one would tell them where he was and Mom was absolutely frantic. When they finally did show up with him - the rest of them were already in that suspended cage and fuck you, Junior - he was all wet and wouldn't respond to anything.

 _Why is he wet?  Why is my son wet? Damn you, Kuvira! What have you done to him?_ Mom was so angry she was shaking, shouting at the blank-faced guards. Dad just held Huan in his lap like he was still a baby, pushing his wet hair out of his face. Wei was frightened. Sometimes Huan went away into his head, that was normal for Huan, but this wasn't normal. Huan wouldn't eat, wouldn't talk, just stared straight ahead, not reacting to any of them at all. It was Wing, laying on the floor of the cage with his arms around Huan, talking to him softly, that finally got him to come back. But he still wasn't okay.

Then Grandma came. It had been quite awhile since they'd seen Grandma! She was with Aunt Lin and Opal, too. They came to rescue them. And _he_ came. Bolin. He'd left Kuvira and Junior. Finally. Aunt Lin came to that damn cage they'd been sitting in all that time and tossed Wei first with her cables and Bolin caught him, arms tightening around him, so strong and so solid, taking Wei's weight like it was nothing. Wei wanted to wrap his arms around him and kiss him but satisfied himself with a little cheek pat instead. Fuck, though. _Fuck._ Wei wasn't a little guy and Bolin just held him like he was light as a feather.

It did nothing to help Wei's crush either that Bolin was so kind to Huan. Anybody who was good to Huan was good in Wei's book. Aunt Lin swung Wing over next and Wing told Bolin that he'd have to be careful with Huan, that something was wrong. Grandma snarled at that; everybody knew how she felt about Huan. Bolin was so gentle when he caught Huan, held him tight and said quietly, "It's okay, Huan, you're safe now, we're going to get you out." He carefully put Huan on his feet and checked to make sure that he was stable before getting in place to catch poor Dad.

Mom had been right about Bolin all along. Kuvira had really fooled him, he had no idea what was really going on. Well. Kuvira fooled lots of people.

They went home to Zaofu after it was all over. Republic City in ruins, Junior in prison for twelve years, Kuvira in prison for sixty-five years to life, Zaofu back under Mom's control. Opal and Bolin made up and Opal stayed on Air Temple Island instead of coming back to Zaofu. The airbenders were moving around a lot, helping rebuild the Earth Kingdom.

Wei kept training. Dad started to rebuild Zaofu. All of his beautiful lotus buildings, torn to pieces, gone. All of Dad's hard work. Wei would never understand why Junior took part in doing it. _Never._ Never forgive him, either. Dad kept trying to put on a good face, kept saying that it would give him a chance to do some improvements to his original design but he looked old when he said it. Old and tired and so very sad. There were people in Zaofu who had been put into the re-education camps - mostly people who had, at some point, maybe even ten years back, looked at Kuvira the wrong way - and it was Wing who stepped up, who took charge of finding out where everyone was and making sure they all got home. Wing had a smile for everyone, never got upset when people complained or lost their tempers or got upset. It's not that it surprised Wei or anything - hell, he and Wing both knew that Wing was far more patient than Wei could ever even hope to be - but it felt like one more thing that set them apart instead of keeping them together. Wei didn't like it. He didn't like it at all. He didn't want to share Wing with everyone else. He knew that made him into an asshole, though, so he just kept his mouth shut.

Mom had set aside one building as a temporary facility to help out the people of Zaofu with whatever they needed as they rebuilt the city and Wing was there every day. Wei avoided it if at all possible; he never knew what to do and he never seemed know the right things to say to make people feel better the way Wing could. He went looking for Wing one day  - he was hoping to try out a new bending move he'd come up with - and found him there, his arms around an elderly lady who was holding a little poodle monkey, crying her eyes out. Turned out the poodle monkey had disappeared in all of the chaos and Wing had been searching for it for two weeks and had finally located it outside of the city proper and had returned the poor little thing to its owner. The old lady cried and cried, cradling her pet, kissing Wing and telling him what a good boy he was. That night at dinner Mom hugged Wing very hard and thanked him for all of his help. Wei sat there at the table feeling completely useless. Wing always was the better twin. The kinder twin. Wei wished he could be more like Wing sometimes. Most of the time, really.

Even Huan was helping in his Huan way, quietly going around the city and repairing or re-doing a lot of the art pieces that been destroyed. His atelier had been completely demolished; it was clear that a metalbender was the one who had wreaked havoc there and they all damn well knew who that metalbender was. Huan just sat there for an entire day, just sat, refusing to leave or to talk to Dad or anyone. Then he picked himself up and started to fix things.

And Wei? Well, Wei practiced his bending. He was so angry, so fucking angry. He was _furious_. He didn't know what to do with all of his anger but to send the clay discs flying, over and over again. Every day he'd bend until he was exhausted. He knew he wasn't being helpful but what else could he do?

He went to visit Junior in prison with Mom and Dad and got into a terrible shouting match with him before Mom hauled him out of there. Fucking Junior. _Fucking_ Junior.

Wu got stabbed in Ba Sing Se and came to stay with them for a time in Zaofu; he and Huan hit it off and Wei was glad. Huan had never really had any friends before and Wu seemed to not only take him for who he was but actually _like_ him for who he was. One night at dinner Wu said something to Huan and Huan laughed; it was the first time he'd laughed since Kuvira had taken Zaofu. The look Mom gave Wu meant that as far as Mom was concerned Wu would never do wrong in her eyes.

Bolin's Grandma and his cousin Tu came to visit Wu and while Tu was no Bolin, he was still pretty easy on the eyes. Wei had a type, he really did, the bigger the better. Tu was not at all interested in Wei though. Wei whined about it to Wing but Wing was less than sympathetic. Like it was Wei's fault that Wing turned into a speechless fool every time he saw a pretty girl.

He wasn't prepared for Huan to go back with Wu to Ba Sing Se, though. It left just him with Wing at home. Opal did stop by every couple of months to visit but the airbenders were all over the Earth Kingdom, taking down those re-education camps, making sure people got back to their former homes if at all possible. Bolin went with her, trying to make things right. Even Wei could see that Bolin carried a heavy burden over all of the things that had gone down with Kuvira and Junior.

After his coronation Wu invited Wei and Wing to come and stay with him in Ba Sing Se. Turned out that Wing was absolute wolfbatshit crazy over Wu's secretary. Sure, even Wei could grant she was pretty. Short as anything - she barely came up to Wing's collarblade - but pretty. All over curves, plump the way that Wing had always gone for in girls. She also had this sort of fierce thing going on, similar to Mom, so Wei could get the appeal, sure. Thing was, Wei accidently caught the two of them in the Palace Conservatory one night - he was looking for Wing and found him but found him with Nuo as well - and Nuo was completely different when she was just with Wei. She was soft and sweet and tender. Wing had the sense to keep himself hidden and he was going to just go back the way he'd come, give them some privacy, he wasn't going to watch, he wasn't a creep or anything but the look Nuo was giving Wing stopped him short. She looked at Wing like the moon and stars hung all over him, like Wing was her entire world in that very moment. And Wing, his twin, the person that Wei thought he knew best in the world, _his_ Wing, Mister Practical, was looking back at her the same way. Wing was so worked up he was actually crying a little bit while he was telling her how he felt about her. Even as far back as he was, hiding behind a tree next to the path, Wei could see Wing was trembling.

Wei crept away at that point. He never told Wing what he'd overheard. It stayed with him, though. He had a thing for Bolin, he had since he'd seen that first mover but did he feel _that_ way about him? Maybe not. But maybe it was different if the person you felt that way towards was a guy? Wei wasn't sure. Thing was, he'd seen how Mako looked at Wu when they were dancing together at Wu's post-coronation party and that Mako, he didn't really strike Wei as the kind of man who was very soft or sweet under any circumstances. Didn't matter. He was looking at Wu like Wu was his entire world. Wei was pretty sure the entire palace could have been burning down around them and neither Mako nor Wu would have noticed at that point. So maybe it was a love thing, not a gender thing. But he loved Bolin, right?

It was so confusing. 

Too confusing. Wei just put it aside and focused on his bending. He trained for hours every day, even in Ba Sing Se. He and Wing went back to Zaofu and while Wing was pining away for Nuo and helping Mom and Dad continue to put Zaofu to rights Wei worked on his bending. He could still get Wing to spar with him but more and more he relied on a few other benders around town who were interested in developing their earthbending to practice with. They weren't much of a challenge, though. Not like Wing had always been.

He felt like he was losing Wing and he hated it. Hated it so much. The only thing that made it better was smashing a few more clay discs around.

 

********************

"Did you sleep here last night?" Wei called out of the bathroom. He'd only gotten out of the shower when the water had gone cold. And he'd brushed his teeth. Twice. He felt marginally better. At least he was standing. And wasn't puking.

"Yeah," Qi called back.

"Shit. Sorry about that! I don't really think that couch was made for sleeping." He heard Qi snort.

"Beats pavement, believe me."

"Does Wu know where you are?" He dug around for clean underwear.

"I called and told LoLo where I was this mornin', didn't want nobody to worry that I didn't make it home last night. Gotta question for you."

"Yeah?" He knew he had to have clean underwear somewhere. Somewhere..somewhere...oh. He hadn't put it away after it came back the last time from the laundry service. Ah well.

"Would it kill you to occasionally set your big fuckin' earthbender feet into a shop to buy some food? There's nothin' to eat here!"

"I wasn't expecting an overnight guest." He needed some pants, too.

"What, you don't feed those boys you bring over here before you send them off all happy and well fucked? Now see, that's just bad manners. Even I know that."

Wei laughed. His head made him regret it a bit but he still laughed.

 

********************

Time kept moving along in Zaofu and Wei kept training. Wu finally officially abdicated and they all went to Ba Sing Se to the ceremony. When the ceremony was over Mako hustled Wu right onto Wu's airship and they left immediately with Yumi for Republic City. (Mako told Mom he was taking no chances with Wu's safety and Wei knew Mom agreed with him.) The Beifongs - including Huan - went back to Zaofu that night on their own airship; right before they took off Nuo showed up with two bags and her chin held high. Wei didn't think he'd ever seen Wing so happy. Wing ran down the gangplank and took her in his arms, didn't let go of her the entire trip home.

It was at this point that Wei and Wing got their own rooms for the first time. Mom put Wing and Nuo up in one of the guest homes in their compound. Wei wasn't sure how Nuo won her over but Mom clearly liked her. Dad adored her. Huan already loved her; he was the one who fetched her bags into the airship that night with a big smile on his face. Before Wei knew what was happening Nuo was calling Mom "Mom" and Dad "Dad" and had taken Zaofu by storm. It was like she had always been there.

He liked Nuo. He did. He tried not to mind that she'd taken over a part of Wing's heart that had always been reserved for him.

One night not long after Nuo had come to Zaofu Mom and Dad called him into Mom's office. They sat him down and asked him how serious he was about the pro-bending. Oh, he was serious. Mom pointed out that she and Dad were aware of all of the hours he was putting into his training and that they had a proposition for him. They were thinking about starting up a new pro-bending team from Zaofu and wondered if Wei would be interested in being on the team.

He stood there for a few moments in shock, trying to wrap his brain around what his parents were saying. 

Then he whooped so loudly that several people came running to see what had happened.

It was a huge deal, putting together a pro-bending team. Hiring a manager, getting the capital to set it up, sponsorship, so on and so forth. They kicked around several names until Nuo suggested the Zaofu Zorillas; it stuck. Huan sketched out team uniforms and a logo in green, silver and black. Mom kicked into high gear and made things happen; she hired as a manager a former pro-bender named Silaluk, a waterbender in her fifties who had been born and raised in Republic City and who had played for years on several different teams before retiring from active play. She'd worked as an assistant manager for the Mo Ce Mongoose Lizards for a few years and was enthusiastic about putting her talents to work for a brand new team. What she wasn't enthusiastic about, however, was the idea that she'd have to take a rich kid onto her team simply because his parents were the ones putting it together. Mom assured her that Wei would try out for the team like everyone else; if Silaluk found a better earthbender then that's who she'd hire, with the Beifong family's full support.

Wei tried out. Silaluk put him through his paces, hard. When he was done, dripping sweat all over the floor, she came down off the bleachers, clapped him on the back and said, "You'll do, sport."

They got a firebender right away, a cocky, mouthy eighteen-year-old from the Fire Nation named Setsu who had played in pro-bending's Junior League and whom Silaluk had had her eye on for a few years.  Wei hit it off with Setsu immediately. Set tore through Zaofu like the fireball she was; broke the hearts of several of Zaofu's most upstanding young citizens before Silaluk took her aside and told her to simmer down and focus on her bending instead of the ladies. She and Wei worked their asses off. Set was quicker on her feet than Wei; he'd never seen anyone who could react quicker than she could. 

They tried out several waterbenders; none seemed to click. Wei was worried but Silaluk told him it was better to put off their debut for a season and find the right waterbender than to go in with a waterbender that wasn't the right fit. So they stayed in Zaofu for the season, continuing to train. About midway through the season a Northern Water Tribe waterbender named Apirlaat showed up in Zaofu. She'd played before but had been out for a season on maternity leave and had no interest in going back to her former team. Silaluk had immediately contacted her once she knew she'd started training again and asked her to try out for the Zorillas. Apirlaat was about ten years older than Wei; she was calm and steady and an incredible strategist. She clicked, immediately. She naturally fell into the position of team captain and both Wei and Set were glad to let her. 

Months went by and they continued to train. Apirlaat called the shots; Wei laid down defense; Set switched it up and hit the opposition in ways they were never expecting. Silaluk told Mom and Dad that the team should move to Republic City and train there; Wei was afraid they'd disagree but they didn't. Arrangements were made to set up a training gym and Mom and Dad bought Wei a flat in the same neighborhood that Wu and Mako lived in. Wei was pretty sure that was no accident; he figured they were hoping that Wu would keep an eye on him. Not to mention Aunt Lin. 

Leaving Zaofu was hard; leaving Wing was even harder. He and Wing had never lived apart. It's not that it wasn't time. Wing and Nuo were engaged by then and Wei certainly wasn't expecting to what, share a home with them? Still, though. Living across the Beifong compound in Zaofu was not the same as moving to an entirely different city. He spent his last night in Republic City in the same bed as Wing, both of them crying their eyes out even though the Spirits knew they were probably too old for that shit. Bless Nuo, she made herself completely scarce that night. Well, she was pretty thoughtful about that kind of thing anyhow. Wei didn't think he could leave Wing to just anybody, but Nuo? Nuo loved Wing too, just as much as Wei did.

His parents rented a box in the pro-bending arena. They made it up for as many games as they could; Wing usually came along with them, bringing Nuo as well. (Huan didn't come but Wei didn't take that personally. He knew Huan couldn't handle all the noise and chaos. Huan listened on the radio, though.) Mako showed up for every game the Zaofu Zorillas played; he had a seat in Mom and Dad's box and always had a Zorillas jersey on. (Set was blown away when she realized for the first time who he was. She begged him to show her a few moves; Mako was happy to do it.) Aunt Lin and Yumi made it to most matches as well, sitting with Mako. Even Korra came to matches when she was in town, she sat in the Beifong box and wore her own jersey. Wei appreciated the support. One night as they came into the playing field he saw Bolin sitting in the Beifong box and he went all over nerves, completely blowing the first round. Apirlaat admonished him to keep his head in the game and he shook it off. Spirits, though. Spirits.

They won the match and afterwards Mako, Bolin and Yumi took Wei and Setsu out for celebratory round. (Apirlaat's husband was still on paternity leave with the new baby but worked as a librarian at Republic City University of all places; neither one of them were into the party scene and it was rare that Apirlaat went out with them.) Wei was completely pumped and Set was on a tear, flirting like crazy with Yumi (who told Set that she was just a baby and to go play with someone her own age). Bolin threw his arm around Wei's shoulders, told him he was a better pro-bender than Bolin had ever been and Wei floated home that night, his feelings for Bolin stirred up and making sleep impossible. Spirits, _Bolin_. 

Wei reminded himself on a daily - hourly - basis that Bolin was his sister's boyfriend. Not his. Not even remotely his. _  
_

The Zaofu Zorillas took third place in that year's Pro-Bending Tournament. It was damn good result for a team in their very first season. His entire family had come up for the final match; even Huan was there. (Wei found out later that Wu had gotten someone to make him a pair of special earplugs and Huan had spent the entire match in near silence, which certainly made for a happier Huan.) Mako and Wu had shown up with Wu's cook LoLo and his driver Qi. Wei knew both of them from the times he'd gone to Wu's for dinner, of course. Bolin and Opal were there as well as Korra and Asami and even Apirlaat's husband had been invited to sit in the box. Tenzin had come over from the Island with Ikki, Kai and Meelo. The game was tight and fast; the Tigerdillos made them work hard for their victory. After the game was over they all - including Apirlaat and her husband - went to Kwong's Cuisine. Wu had rented out the entire restaurant for the evening and there was a big reception and party. There was plenty of champagne and even a live band playing. Leave it to Wu to throw a hell of a party; his parties were already legendary in Republic City.

At one point Wei and Set had snuck out the back door for a quick smoke; Wei's parents (and Silaluk!) had no idea he smoked and he intended on keeping it that way. They found Wu's driver Qi back there as well, just leaning against the wall. Qi nodded in their direction. Qi was out of uniform that night; Wei hadn't ever seen Qi in regular clothes before then and Qi had a hell of a sharp suit on. Even Qi's hair was combed back and styled. Qi looked pretty good.

Setsu raised her eyebrow and gave Qi a slow and lingering up and down. "So," she said. "Are you a boy or a girl?"

Qi raised an eyebrow right back and answered in that gritty voice, "I'm an experience."

Wei laughed and Qi winked at him; Set's mouth dropped open for a moment before her eyes narrowed and she slammed her way back inside.

"Nice one," said Wei. He wasn't sure himself whether Qi was a boy or a girl; however at that moment he realized that he really didn't care one way or the other. Anybody who could out-sass and shut up Setsu had to be someone worth knowing. The next time Wei went over to Wu's for dinner he struck up a conversation with Qi. Qi wasn't particularly talkative and was fairly distrustful at first; Wei persisted though and used all of the considerable Beifong charm he'd inherited from his mother. Qi finally defrosted enough to answer him with something more than monosyllables. Turned out Qi was damn funny; Qi also knew Republic City from top to bottom and took Wei out to a few places he most certainly hadn't known anything about. Qi wasn't much of a drinker and Wei knew Qi didn't take anyone home the way he did but they had a good time when they went out. Qi liked music and enjoyed dancing and was always up for being Wei's wingman. Qi was good to talk to, too. Not the judgmental sort, Qi. Knew how to listen and knew how to keep a secret as well. Qi was the first person Wei had been able to talk to - really talk to - since he'd left Wing. Sometimes he'd walk over from his flat to Qi's place above Wu and Mako's garage and they'd sit, hang out, shoot the shit, kill time until LoLo called them in for dinner. Qi had an outlook on the world that was different than anything else Wei had ever known; Qi seemed disinterested in most things and so laid-back as to appear lazy, but it wasn't that at all. Qi just took each and every day as it came. Qi didn't worry about things Qi couldn't do anything about. Wei envied that skill, he really did.

Wei's days were busy. He trained; he did public appearances with the rest of the team and Wu got him to show up and read with his street rat charity kids sometimes, which was fun. The kids really looked up to him and Wei was the one who had the idea to have a special night for the street rats at the arena where they got to attend the match for free. (Wu was all over the idea and made it happen; he made sure Wei got the credit for it in the news, though.) He began to get recognized while he was out and about; people stopped him on the street for autographs and he was interviewed and photographed for magazines. Shiro Shinobi had him on his radio talk show and the ratings went through the roof. Wei had never paid all that much attention to his appearance but Wu introduced him to a very good tailor and even Wei was impressed with how good he looked in a custom made suit. He learned how to drive (thank you, Mako) and bought a brand new convertible Satomobile in Zorilla colors (thank you, Asami). In the off-season he got together some metalbenders and showed them the basics of power disc. Even Aunt Lin came out and played sometimes and a bunch of her metalbending officers played as well. It wasn't official or anything, but they had a good time. Wei had missed playing power disc. 

He loved it. He loved all of it. Republic City was his playground and Wei Beifong? Oh, Wei Beifong did like to play. And as far as playing went? Oh, Republic City had plenty of fanboys. Well, fangirls too, but word got around pretty fast that the Zaofu Zorillas' Wei Beifong wasn't interested in fangirls. Fanboys, though, plenty of those. Take your pick, and Wei did. A flash of a grin, dancing just a little too close, a few drinks - not enough to get drunk, just enough to loosen things up - an invite over - your place or mine, Wei wasn't picky - and everyone would go home satisfied, no strings attached. Wei and Setsu, they both had their fun. Silaluk made it crystal clear that she would not put up with hangovers or overtired and partied out players, however; Wei and Set learned quickly when they could party and when they needed to buckle down and go to bed early and sober. Wei knew better than to fuck with Silaluk, Beifong or not she'd toss his ass off the team if he didn't give one hundred percent. Wei enjoyed his free time to the fullest but he also gave the Zorillas everything he had. He put pro-bending first.

He tried not to think about Bolin. He tried. Once his nephew San was born Opal stopped moving around so much. She and Bolin actually built a house not far from Wei's place and moved off of the Island. Tenzin wasn't very happy about it but what was Opal supposed to do? Go and live in a temple with the kids and leave Bolin in the city alone while he made movers? Opal still worked with the airbenders but she had a foot in the rest of the world as well. In any case it was clear from the start that little San was an earthbender, so it wasn't like he was going to get much from living on the Island anyhow. Wei loved the little guy, he liked taking him to the zoo and to the amusement park. He took Wu and Mako's little boy, Zhi, as well. Zhi was a hoot, never shut up, chip off the old Wu block. Their oldest girl Naoki was a great kid, too. Nuo and Wing got married and a year later she up and had Orchid and Iris - twin girls and Wing was so damn happy - and Opal had another baby; named him Norbu for their paternal grandfather. Yumi had Meili and gave her to Wu and Mako to raise and then along came Wing's little Rose, the third flower in what Zaofu started calling Nuo's Garden. There were kids everywhere, it seemed. Wei didn't mind. He loved being an uncle. He was a great uncle, too, if he said so himself.

His Aunt Lin retired and hell, she practically lived at Wu and Mako's place, had a thing with the cook, LoLo. It had been going on for years, apparently, Qi knew all about it.

It seemed like everyone was growing up and away, though. Huan shocked the shit out of just about everyone by just up and leaving one day with Tenzin's younger girl, Ikki; Jinora and Kai finally got tired of hiding what everyone already knew was going on anyhow and moved into their own room together over on the Island. Eventually Tenzin's brother Bumi took Meelo out of Republic City and down to the Southern Air Temple. Wei wasn't sure what was going on there but according to his Aunt Lin it wasn't good.

The Zorillas were a team to be reckoned with. As seasons passed they only got stronger; Apirlaat's calmness helped mellow out Setsu and she was a better bender for it; Wei got even more disciplined and was considered one of the best defensive players in pro-bending. Which was pretty funny if you thought about it, Wei had always been a hothead. You'd have thought he'd make a better offensive player. Not the case, though. Things were going well. Things were going so well.

 

He'd shown up at Wu's that night for dinner to find Bolin already there. He was supposed to have gone down with Opal and the boys for a visit to Zaofu but had to back out at the last second due to some sort of scheduling snafu with the mover he was filming. Bolin had had them all in hysterics over dinner telling some story about a wardrobe malfunction that ended in Bolin getting so entangled with a stuntman in a goat gorilla suit that they had to be taken apart with scissors. After dinner Bolin was going to go home but Wei convinced him to go out to one of the clubs for a drink. Both Wu and Qi were giving him the side-eye but Wei had nothing nefarious planned, he was just going to take Bolin for a drink. Bolin drove them both over to Wei's place first and then Wei called for a cab to take them into the club district. 

They had a few rounds before taking another cab back to Wei's place. Wei was still fairly soberish at that point but Bolin rarely drank and his tolerance wasn't nearly what Wei's was. He certainly wasn't in any shape to be driving, staggering and slurring his words just a little, leaning on Wei as they got out of the cab. Which was doing absolutely nothing for Wei's cool, thanks for asking. What the hell was he thinking, going out alone with Bolin? He debated putting him in another cab to take him home but damn, that probably wasn't the best idea either, not with Bolin being as wobbly as he was. Best to let him sober up a bit first before sending him home. So he brought him upstairs into his flat, put on the radio - softly, he did have neighbors, after all - and offered to make some tea. Bolin drank his tea and it became increasingly clear that he was drunker than Wei first suspected, so he offered him the couch for the night and Bolin accepted. Wei went to fetch a spare blanket and pillow and when he'd come back into the living room Bolin had stripped down to nothing but his shorts.

It would have been better if he could have blamed it on a drunken loss of control but that would have been a lie. Wei was buzzed, sure, but he wasn't drunk, not like Bolin was. He knew what he was doing when he put his mouth against Bolin's; knew what he was doing when he dropped the pillow and the blanket and pulled Bolin closer. Bolin was startled at first; he froze and Wei started to pull back but then Bolin's arms went around him and he pressed his mouth back into Wei's mouth and for one moment Wei Beifong had everything he'd ever thought he wanted. He kissed Bolin, held him in his arms for those brief moments, touched the strength in him, heard him suck in a breath, felt him growing hard against his thigh before his brain screamed at him to stop, screamed at him that this was Opal's man, not his, that this was _Bolin_ , not some fanboy he'd brought home for fun. 

Thank the spirits that Wei had been focusing on his defensive game for so many years at that point, because it's what allowed him to step back, breaking out of Bolin's arms. "We can't do this, I'm sorry," he said, trying to get control of himself and he nearly broke when Bolin reached out a hand to cup his face. "Don't!" Wei shouted, smacking Bolin's arm away before fleeing, running for the safety of his bedroom, turning the lock for the first time in all of the years he'd lived there. He stood in the middle of the room, trying to remember how to breathe.

It took everything in him, every single ounce of self-control, all of his training to stay on the other side of that locked door until, several minutes later, he heard the sound of his front door opening and closing. He walked into the bathroom to stare at himself in the mirror, loathing himself in that moment. Whether it was because he kissed Bolin or let him go even Wei wasn't sure.

He didn't know if he'd ever be sure. So he left his flat and went looking for enough alcohol to make him forget about it for that night, at least. Spirits knew where he would have ended up if Qi hadn't come to fetch him home.

 

*******************

Wei threw on the pair of clean pants he found and went looking for Qi. Qi was sitting out on one of the chairs Wei had on on his balcony, barefoot, smoking a cigarette.

"I thought Wu hated those things," said Wei, flopping down in the other chair. He put his hand out; Qi shook another smoke out of Qi's silver case.

"He hates 'em. Which is why he don't see me doing it. Course _he_ does it too."

 _He_ meant Mako. Qi very rarely referred to Mako by name.

"Who, Mako? Seriously?"

"Yeah, on the sly. Sometimes we smoke together, hidin' out in the back. He keeps quiet about me and I keep quiet about him."

"Huh. Didn't know you and Mako were on smoking together terms."

Qi shrugged. "Not like he's going anywhere. Does me no good to be an asshole to him."

Wei dug around in his pants pockets and then accepted the book of matches Qi handed over without looking away from the skyline. He lit up and took a drag. "I don't really think I'd want to be on Mako's bad side myself."

"He stabbed a guy once."

"Who? _Mako_?" Wei nearly dropped his cigarette in surprise.

"Yeah. Before my time, course, but I heard it around from some of the other kids, the ones a bit older than me. Legendary story with the street rats. Story goes there was this guy with the Triple Threats who liked boys. Littler ones, you got me?"

"Spirits," said Wei, grimacing.

"Yeah, well, welcome to the streets. Anyhow, from what I was told, when  _he_  was about eleven or so he caught this guy - went by the name of Shizu the Scorpion - trying to convince Bolin to unzip his pants for a nice fat surprise, if you follow. So he told Bolin to scram and soon as Bolin was gone? Old son unzipped the Scorpion's pants and just when the Scorpion gets to thinking he's gonna have some fun now  _he_ took up his knife and slammed it right into the meat of that fucker's thigh, told him next time he caught him anywheres near Bolin or the other kids he'd take his balls off for him. Then _he_ walks up to Lightning Bolt Zolt - he was the head of the Triple Threats at the time - cool as you please and tells him what he did and why. Next thing you know Shizu the Scorpion's been run out of town and Zolt puts out the word that anyone messin' with any of the littles will answer to Zolt. That was that."

Wei leaned back. "I've never heard that before."

Qi shrugged. "He don't like to talk about his time with the Triads much. From what I heard he was damn good with numbers and Zolt took him under his wing. Taught him how to bend lightning and shit. Word back then was Zolt was grooming him for the inner circle. I dunno. I never messed with the Triads myself, but I can't fault him. He had his little brother to take care of. Hard enough to take care of yourself on the street. Can't imagine doing it for a little one, too."

"My Aunt Lin says he's a good cop, but not very observant about stuff at home." Wei took another drag.

Qi's head shook. "Naw, it's not that. He's really fuckin' observant. I mean, he notices damn near everything. Puts it all together in his head, too. He's quick. Well, he'd have to be to survive like he did. I think it's just that he turns it off when he gets home. That noticing shit talent he's got. Like if he kept that shit up twenty-four-seven it'd mean no rest ever for him. I think he just wants to be home when he's home, let his head turn off, be a family man. If he wants to know somethin' at home he figures it out damn quick. I seen him do it."

"Huh," said Wei. They sat there for a time in silence. "How do you do it?"

"What?"

"Live there like you do."

Qi shrugged again. "Look, I got two choices. I can either stay there and work for the boss or I can go work for someone else. I could go work somewhere else, too, Asami Sato offered me a job. She wants me to test drive her new cars."

"You never told me that!"

"Well, I didn't take the job, did I? She didn't go behind the boss's back or nothin', she right up asked me in front of him. He told me if I wanted it to take it, I could still live over the garage. Told me I was part of the family, I always had a place to live. Didn't want to, though. I don't want to leave him or the kids, neither."

"Even if you could still live there?"

"Even if. Don't want to leave him. Don't get me wrong, I know he don't want me, not in the way I wanted him to. He never will, either. I can deal with it, though, I'm not a kid anymore. When it comes down to it I don't want to work for nobody else."

"I wish I could be like you," Wei said and sighed, shoving his hair back. "I kissed him last night, Qi. That's all, though. I stopped myself, walked away. He went home. But I'm the one who started it."

Qi grunted.

"Aren't you going to say anything?"

Qi took out a cigarette and stared at it before turning to look at Wei. "Why you want that man so bad? I'm not talking about wantin' to fuck him, because everybody knows you want to do that. But why else? He's not the right man for you. He never was. He's a simple man. I don't mean he's dumb, I mean he's simple. He wants to make movers and love on those babies and your sister, be nice to everybody. I never saw a kinder man in my life. But he also wants your sister to take care of him and make all the decisions for him because that's all he knows. His brother made all the decisions for him for years and years and Bolin, he's a great guy, but he can't make his own decisions for shit. Every single decision he makes on his own is a bad one, you know it's true. So your sister, she makes his decisions for him. She takes care of him and she likes that, she likes being the one who is makin' the decisions. It makes her happy, everybody can see it. Both of them get what they want - she gets a sweet kind man that she can tell what to do without a fuss and he gets a damn good woman that tells him what to do without makin' him cry or feel bad about it. They're just right for each other. But you? That what you want? Would that make you happy? I know you better than that. Sure, you'd be happy at first because you'd have him to fuck and play with. But after that all wore off, what would you be left with? A man who followed you around like a damn turtleduck chick, expecting you to do everythin' and fix everythin' and you'd lose your patience with that right quick. You'd be angry and resentful and mean to him and it would just go to shit. You're not Opal."

Wei stared back at Qi until his forgotten cigarette burned his fingers. He swore and shook his singed fingers out.

Qi looked down at the unlit cigarette and then carefully put it back into the case. Qi's fingers worried at the sea glass bracelet that was permanently ensconced around Qi's wrist. "The boss, I can't even tell you. He came into my life, took me off the street, gave me everything. A place of my own, a job I love, a family to love me. He always included me. Never tried to pry into my business, never tried to put me in a box or tell me who I should be. He just took me as I was from day one. First person in my life to treat me with respect and kindness. I'm human. I want someone to hold me at night, I'm no different than anyone else. But the boss? He's not right for me. What, am I gonna go with him to his fancy damn dinners and wear a nice suit and talk all polite to people I hate? Not on your life. Rather die. The thing is... _he's_ a street kid, too. But he's not the same as me. Oh, he pisses and moans about goin' to all those fancy charity dinners with the boss, but he's full of shit and everybody knows it. He loves dressin' up in a fine suit, loves having the boss on his arm. Loves showin' the boss off. He loves livin' in that fancy house and all of it. He loves takin' care of the boss, loves being a father to those children, loves it every time the boss buys him something new and shiny. Don't get me wrong, the boss gets it back too. Boss loves how _he_ always takes care of him, makes a big deal of him, treats him like some kind of precious jewel. _He_ fusses after the boss and the boss, he just eats it up. I don't care that he stepped down, the boss is royalty and _he_ treats him like that. Boss sure as shit ain't gonna get treated like royalty by me. I'm not gonna fuss after him, it's not my way. And that's what I mean. Me, I got what I needed. I got a home. I got a family. I can play with engines all day long. I got money that _he_ helped me invest, enough so I don't have to ever be scared of my future. Hell, I can read and write now, somethin' I never thought would happen. Did I want the boss to love me like he loves _him_? I did. You know I did. But we don't suit. We'd just end up unhappy. And yeah, it hurt. It hurt a lot, and you know I'm not lyin'. You know how much it hurt me."

"I know," said Wei quietly. He looked down at his feet.

"I want someone to love me, just like you do, I'm not gonna lie. It hurts. I get lonely, same as you. Plus, I'm me." Qi flashed a grin and dropped into Republic City's street patois, vowels lengthening. "Ain't some hotshit pretty boy pro-bender shakin' my fine ass all over town."

That got a laugh out of Wei. "Fuck off, Qi."

Qi let go of the bracelet and tossed Wei the cigarette case. "If I could fuck off I'd probably be a lot happier."

Wei caught the case mid-air. "Yes to that, my friend."

"What you want, Wei? Settlin' down, makin' babies, having a nice house, eatin' dinner with the inlaws? Nah, you don't want that. It's not you. You're not Wing. You're not Opal. What you like doin' is bendin' and partyin', being in the limelight. So what's wrong with that? You're not hurtin' nobody by being yourself. Have some fun with your life. Later, if you want it, find yourself a good man, settle down. Or maybe you just don't. Let it happen as it happens. Your Mama, she got two kids happily paired up and both of them givin' her grandbabies. Wing, he's in Zaofu, he's not gonna leave there, he and that wife of his, they'll be the ones to run that city when she's gone and your Mama, she knows that. So why you still tryin' to be someone you're not, huh? You're not the family bad boy, not by a long shot, everybody in the damn world knows who the Beifong bad boy is and it sure as shit ain't you. Nobody expectin' you to be Wing except for you, either. So. Fine. You went and kissed your sister's baby daddy. Come on. If that's the worst thing you ever done in your life you're still doin' pretty good. Least you didn't blow up an entire fuckin' city, you know? Have some perspective. It was a mistake. Let it go, move on. And by move on I mean let Bolin go. You're not hangin' on to the real Bolin anyhow. You just hangin' on to the dream man you had when you were still just a kid wakin' up with sticky sheets every mornin'. That Bolin, he don't exist, he never did. Let him go and let go of the real Bolin, too. You'd be fuckin' miserable with him."

Wei stared out at the skyline for a long moment before taking a deep breath and letting it back out again. "When the fuck did you turn into such a philosopher?"

Qi snorted. "Just cause I ain't talkin' don't mean I ain't thinkin'." A flash of that grin and Qi's voice echoed Wu's aristocratic tones. "I'm more thoughtful than you give me credit for."

"Shit," said Wei and tossed the cigarette case onto the glass-topped table next to his elbow. "I know you're right."

"Happens every once in awhile. I just...I see people goin' around, talkin' that they need to change this or that to make themselves fit with someone else. Tryin' to always improve who they are, be somebody they aren't. What's the point of it? Be who you are, find the person who accepts you and wants you that way. Fuck tryin' to be better all the time. Just be yourself and be as good as you can be."

"So what do _you_ want then, Qi?" Wei cocked his head. "Seriously. We've been friends a few years now. You've never said." At Qi's look, he threw up his hands. "I'm not fucking with you. I really want to know."

Qi was quiet for a few moments. "I used to want to get out of this damn city. Sometimes I think I'd like to join your brother up there at that temple up north. Quiet, clean, people just leavin' me be. Or maybe just get in a car, drive and drive 'til the end of the world, go where no one knows me, start it all over. Leave all of it behind, all the bad memories, all the damn mistakes I made. Somewhere I could just work on my engines. I'm not good for much else." Qi shrugged. "I don't know, though. Now if I left I'd miss the kids and LoLo and the boss, of course. Even miss your aunt, she's been good to me, in her own way. Really miss them. Guess that's the downside of makin' connections to people." 

"You ought to give Setsu a try."

Qi snorted. "That woman hates me, you know it."

"Fine line between love and hate, isn't that what they always say?" Wei grinned. "She wants you. I keep telling you. I'm not wrong."

Qi's eyes rolled. "Give it a rest. Go get dressed. I promised LoLo I'd bring you for dinner." Wei shot Qi a look. "What?" 

"You've gone domestic on us, Qi." Wei stood up and looked down at Qi.

"Shit. I'm not taking the family I got now for granted, Wei. Neither should you. You don't know what it's like not to have anyone. So, you know, quit bein' a self-pityin' dick. Get over yourself and go put on a fuckin' shirt so we can go get somethin' to eat. I'm hungry."

Wei grabbed the top of Qi's head and dropped a rough kiss on it before walking inside to get dressed.

"Asshole!" Qi called after him but it was followed by that scratchy chuckle.

Wei smiled as he grabbed a clean shirt. 


	4. Take Me, I'm Yours: Wing Beifong

184 AG, Zaofu  
Wing Beifong

 

Wing hadn't meant to crush the rosebush. He and Wei had gone with Mom into the center of Zaofu to shop for new shoes. Both of them had hit a growth spurt and Mom joked that pretty soon she was just going to slap boxes on their feet and call it a day. Wei was messing around as usual and Mom got that look on her face - that look when her lips frowned down and her eyes narrowed - and Wing knew it was just a matter of time before Mom was going to pop her cork. Luckily it was at that point that someone from one of Mom's committees came in and started talking to her. Mom pointed her finger at them and told them to stay put; naturally the moment that she turned her back Wei was already heading out the door. Wing wavered - Mom would _kill_ them - but then Wei grinned at him through the window and made that stupid crybaby face he always made when he accused Wing of being a big old scared baby. 

Wing knew better, he really really  _really_  did. But he hated that stupid crybaby face.

Out the door he went, flying down the street after Wei who was running as fast as he could, laughing. They dodged around a fruit cart, ran out in front of a woman with a pram (the woman stopped short and shouted at them) and careened down another street. Faster and faster they went, Wing running short of breath, until they were in a residential area, small neat houses set into a spoke pattern around a small central park. Wing skidded around the corner and ran right into the block of pavement Wei sent surging up, flying into the air and tumbling over a neat little picket fence and right into someone's rosebush.

He lay there for a moment, breathless and stunned, trying to get his bearings. Suddenly there was a terrible noise in his ear and he turned his head to see an infuriated poodle monkey thrusting its face into his, letting Wing know exactly how it felt at this trespass. Wing struggled to sit up, hissing in pain as thorns caught in his clothes and skin. 

"You're one of those Beifong twins, aren't you?"

Wing stopped struggling in the rosebush and looked up to see an elderly lady frowning at him.

"Uh...yes, ma’am? Madame?” He wasn’t sure of how best to address her, so he went with Madame. It seemed safest.

"Is there a particular reason as to why you're in my rosebush?"

"Um...my brother and I..." Wing trailed off, looking for Wei. Who had disappeared already. Of course he had. First sign of trouble, Wei was always gone. "We uh...we were kind of messing around and uh..." He swallowed.

The lady put her hands on her hips. "So which one of you was responsible for that?" She nodded at the chunk of churned up sidewalk on the other side of her fence.

"That was Wei. My brother, I mean."

"So then you must be Wing."

"Yes, Madame. I'll fix it, I promise!" He wriggled around in the rosebush again, wincing as he heard his tunic rip. He finally managed to crawl out of the bush. The woman didn't help; she also didn't call off the poodle monkey that was frothing at the mouth at this point. He stood up and carefully put the pavement back into place, making sure it was even and without cracks. "I'm really sorry. Really sorry."

"And how will that help my rosebush, then?"

Wing turned back and looked at the demolished rosebush. "Oh, it's all ruined, isn't it?" He dropped to his knees and tried to gather up the broken pink roses. "Oh Madame, I'm so sorry, so sorry." He looked up at her, distressed, tears in his eyes. "All your pretty flowers, I'm so sorry." He held out the roses to her as an offering. "I have pocket money I've saved, I was going to buy my brother new drawing pencils for his birthday next month but I will buy you new roses. How much do they cost? If I don't have enough saved I promise I won't spend any of my money until I pay it off, I promise."

"You're bleeding," the woman said, putting a gentle finger under his chin and tilting his face. "Come on inside, let me clean you up a little. Then we can talk about replacing the rosebush." She looked down at the poodle monkey. "All right, that's enough, hush now, Bubbles." Bubbles hushed as he and Wing followed her into her house.

"So Wing, is it? How old are you now, nine?" She led Wing into her kitchen and pointed to a chair. Wing obediently sat down.

"Ten, Madame. Our birthday was last week."

"Well, ten-year-old Wing Beifong, save your money to buy your brother his drawing pencils." She took out a clean kitchen towel and dampened it, carefully cleaning up the scratches on Wing's face. "I'm sure we can figure something out with regards to the rosebush. Now tell me, do you like cake?"

"Cake?"

"Poppyseed cake, as a matter of fact."

"Oh yes, Madame!" Wing liked poppyseed cake very much  _indeed_.

She smiled at him and her face changed entirely. She looked friendly. She looked nice. She went to the sideboard and took the lid off a glass cake holder, cutting Wing an  _enormous_  slice of cake. She put it in front of him and then fetched him a glass of milk. "I'll be right back. Don't give any of it to Bubbles; he'll beg for it, but he'll get fat if he eats snacks."

"Yes, Madame," said Wing with his mouth full. It was very good cake. 

Bubbles whined and tried to look hungry.

"I can't do it, Bubbles, she said I can't."

Bubbles drooped pathetically.

"Well, okay, but just a bite. Don't tell!" Wing quickly gave the poodle monkey a little bite, which caused the creature to wriggle in ecstasy. 

The lady came back in and sat across the table from him. She asked him about his favorite subject at school (history), what he wanted to be when he grew up (not sure yet), what his favorite thing to do was (toss up between metalbending and kite flying) and his favorite food (that poppyseed cake was rising up his list with every bite).

The doorbell rang, and she answered it. Wing heard his father's voice.

"Madame Nuying, I apologize." Dad followed her into the kitchen, giving Wing a stern look.

"No need, young Master Beifong here was very contrite indeed. He very generously offered to give up his pocket money to replace my rosebush; however, I think I have a better resolution." She gestured Dad into a chair. He sat. "Do you like poppyseed cake?"

Dad blinked. "Uh. I suppose I do, yes."

"It's really good, Dad!"

His father smiled. "Far be it from me to refuse a slice of really good cake, then."

Madame Nuying bustled about cutting Dad a slice of cake and making him a cup of tea. She sat down at the table with her own teacup as well. "I was thinking that perhaps Wing here could come by a few days after school for a week or two and help me out with some of my gardening work. I could use a pair of young hands this spring."

Dad took a bite of cake. "This is delicious!" He swallowed and then looked at Wing. "Do you think that's fair, Wing?"

Wing nodded. "I promise I'll work really hard. I am really sorry about the rosebush."

"We should also discuss his brother. Wei was involved as well." Dad took another very large bite.

Madame Nuying put up a hand. "Not necessary. I'll leave his brother up to you and your wife. I only need Wing here to help me out."

Wing showed up every day after school, as promised. He helped Madame Nuying with her garden; the rosebushes in the front yard were nothing compared to the beautiful garden in the back. Turned out that Madame had been a professor of botany at Republic City University until she'd retired to Zaofu a couple of years back. She had even written and illustrated books on plants! She knew everything there was to be known about growing things. 

Wing assumed they would be replacing the squashed rosebush; however, Madame showed him how they would prune it back, give it some special mulch and make sure it got lots of particular care. "Roses are hardy little things," she told Wing. "Let's not give up on her quite yet. She might just surprise us." 

Wing kept coming, even though he didn't have to after those first two weeks. He couldn't come every single day, but he came at least once or twice a week, and more if he could manage it. Madame always had cake for him. Sometimes he'd help her in the garden; sometimes he'd take Bubbles for long walks; sometimes he'd run errands for her. Wei thought it was a little weird that Wing liked to hang out at Madame's house but he didn't make fun or anything. 

What was left of the rosebush didn't bloom again at all that first spring and Wing was worried, but Madame told him to be patient. So he was. He made sure in the fall he took especial care in wrapping up what he thought of as  _his_  rosebush for the winter.

It didn't bloom the next spring either. Wing was heartbroken but Madame told him to just keep taking care of it and to keep being patient. His diligence was rewarded the spring after that. Madame had called the house first thing on their birthday and asked Mom if Wing could stop by for a few minutes; Mom said of course. (Mom and Dad never minded that he went to visit Madame, so long as his homework and chores were done.) There, on his rosebush, was one single deep pink bloom, petals unfurling in the still slightly chilly morning sunlight. Madame had already been up early that morning and had sketched it, labeling it properly and even using her watercolors to shade it. She gave him the sketch and Mom had it framed for him. He hung it up above his bed. It made him feel good inside, whenever he saw it. Madame was right. Sometimes you just had to be patient and take care of things and wait for them to bloom in their own time.

It only gave one bloom that first spring, the spring he turned twelve. The spring he turned thirteen there were several blooms. The spring he turned seventeen, the spring Kuvira came and took Zaofu, it was full of blossoms. To look at it you would have never known that a ten year old boy had once nearly flattened it.

Wing felt the same way about Zaofu. He loved Zaofu. Kuvira and Junior had tried to flatten it, had pillaged it and used its scavenged pieces to build something that destroyed instead of bloomed; nevertheless, Zaofu had survived. Which only made Wing even more determined to help build it back to what it had been.

It was utter chaos when they returned to Zaofu from Republic City. It wasn't just the domes or the destruction of Huan's atelier; it was the lost looks on people's faces, bruised and hurting. They landed in the airfield - Asami Sato had lent them a Future Industries airship to return home in - and the first thing that Wing had done was make his way to Madame Nuying's house. He had worried about her the entire time he'd been imprisoned, the entire time they'd been in Republic City. He tried not to look around as he jogged his way through the city streets to her home; tried not to notice all of the Earth Empire banners and the posters with Kuvira's face on them still plastered to walls. He rang her doorbell and she answered, took one look at him and burst into noisy tears. He threw his arms around her as well and hugged her like his life depended on it.

It was only after she'd invited him in and apologized for not having any cake to offer - food supplies into the city had been strictly controlled by Kuvira's forces, things like sugar and eggs and butter were nearly impossible to get - that he realized that Bubbles was not there. Madame told him that she had taken Bubbles for a walk and he'd been terrified by one of the mecha stomping past and had broken free and run off. Poor Madame just sat right down and cried and cried over it. Wing felt awful. He knew that Bubbles was the only family that Madame had. He decided right then and there that he'd find Bubbles, one way or the other.

As he left Madame's house he was stopped several times on the street. People recognized him; some knew him as Wing (over the years he'd gotten to know the people in Madame's neighborhood) and some just knew him as a Beifong. He was peppered with questions, with complaints, even with a few hugs. People were scared, Wing could tell. They were clearly glad to have the Beifongs back in town but Wing understood the fear and the anger. He felt the same way himself.

A woman came running up to him, calling his name. He knew her; she and her wife ran a flower shop downtown. Their son had been in Huan's class in school. Wing didn't know Eun well, but he knew who he was, of course. She told Wing that her son had been taken away by Kuvira's forces, taken to one of the camps, but she didn't know which one. She cried as she told him and without thinking he put his arms around her as well, offering her his much abused handkerchief.

By the time he got back to the house a few hours had passed. Mom and Dad were in her office with several other people; Wing crept in and listened from the back.

"There have been some rumors of people going missing to these so-called camps but I'm not sure how much credence to give them," said one of the men.

"Eun is missing," Wing said. "His mothers run the Chiming Lotus flower shop downtown. He was in Huan's class at school. His mother told me he's been gone for nearly three weeks now, she saw him taken away by the mecha when he spoke out against Kuvira in the marketplace."

Everyone turned to stare at him. "Where did you hear that?" his mother asked.

"His mother, Myung, just told me. She says that there were two other people taken that day as well, Jin who works at the green grocer shop and Dandan, the one who drives the trams, not Dandan the writer who lives over in the north part of town."

Mom nodded. "Who else, Wing?"

"Some of Kuvira's soldiers that tried to run away are there as well, but they were from out of town, some of the conscripts."

The man who had spoken about the rumors smiled condescendingly down at Wing. "Well, we do need confirmation, not gossip."

This made Wing angry. Wing didn't get angry very often - he wasn't Wei or Junior, after all - but he'd had a very long day and several people had cried on him and he was worried about Bubbles. "Fine. If you want confirmation, then I'll bring people to you. Have you even gone to talk to people? Have you even asked? Or did you think people would come to find you on top of trying to find food to eat and other supplies?" He turned to his mother. "Madame Suna from the green grocer says that all of her deliveries for the past two months have been commandeered by Kuvira's soldiers. She's been working with residents to get fruit and vegetables from private gardens out to families that have small children but that there haven't been any deliveries of anything for over a week now, there must be some kind of snarl up in the trains coming into town."

Dad smiled at Wing. Mom nodded crisply. "Thank you for the report, Wing. Anything else?"

Well, he was pretty sure no one else would care about Bubbles, so he shook his head. "That's all I heard when I went to check on Madame."

"Surely Madame Beifong you'll agree that we need to confirm this, you know how boys are, prone to some exaggeration..." 

Uh oh. Wing could have warned the man not to say anything to Mom about her kids, but too late now. Mom got that angry look on her face and she spoke very sharply to the man.

"It sounds to me like Wing has found out more in a couple of hours than you have managed to find out in the entire time we were gone. Perhaps you'd know more if you did something else than sit behind a desk all day?" Oooooh, Mom! Burn! "Wing is an extremely reliable young man. In fact, I have half a mind to put him in charge of finding out who is missing." She turned to Wing. "Would you be willing to do that, Wing? Find out for us who is missing?"

Wing nodded. "I can do it."

Mom smiled at him. "Good. I know I can count on you."

That's how it started, how he started to keep up the lists of who went missing. He included on his list the conscripts from Kuvira's forces who'd tried to desert; they might not have been from Zaofu but they were victims just the same. Mom cleared out one building that he and others who were helping could use as sort of a headquarters. In what little spare time he had he fanned out, went searching for Bubbles. He got Chef to make him some poppyseed cake from the supplies that started to come back into the city (it wasn't as good as Madame's poppyseed cake of course, but he'd never say so, he wouldn't want to hurt Chef's feelings) and he put it in his pocket. He walked and walked, calling for Bubbles until his voice was hoarse and his feet ached. Finally, one afternoon when he'd roamed a fair way outside of the city's borders, he heard a little familiar chittering. Carefully he crouched down and slowly pulled out the (fairly squashed) poppyseed cake from his pocket.

"Bubbles? Is that you, boy? It's me. It's Wing. I have cake. Do you want some cake?" He waited, patiently, proffered cake in hand. He heard the bushes just to the side of him rustling, but he stayed completely still. A few more minutes; a little more rustling and Bubbles' little head peered out of the bushes. Wing continued to speak quietly. He made no sudden moves. Bubbles crept closer and closer until he stood in front of Wing, shivering. Slowly, ever so slowly, Wing offered a piece of cake. Bubbles snatched it and gobbled it down. He was very thin and very dirty, Wing could see. He still had his collar on. "There, that was good, wasn't it? Do you want some more?" Another piece, slowly broken off, offered gently. Wing didn't want to scare him away, he could see poor Bubbles was not in very good shape. Finally, when there was only one bite left in Wing's hand, Bubbles crept up to Wing and nestled his little head into Wing's chest. Wing fed him the last piece of cake and took him into his arms, petting him soothingly. "It's okay, boy, I'm going to take you back to Madame now, I know you've missed her. She's missed you, too." He clipped the leash he had stowed into his other pocket onto Bubbles' collar but put him inside of his tunic, keeping him nestled into the warmth of his arms and chest for the walk back into the city.

He went straight to Madame's house but she wasn't there. Her next door neighbor came out and told Wing that Madame had gone to the Reparation Center downtown looking for him. He jogged down there, Bubbles securely held against him. Dad was standing outside when he ran up; he waved Wing over but Wing called that he had to give something to someone and he'd come back in a few minutes. He walked inside and saw Madame sitting on one of the benches, looking so sad. Oh, poor Madame. He made his way over to her; she looked up as he came over and her face went right to the lump under his tunic.

"Oh! Oh! Wing! Did you...is that...?" She put both hands over her mouth as Bubbles poked his head through Wing's collar, nearly choking him, chittering in his joy to see his mistress. Wing untangled him, laughing, and handed him over to Madame. Bubbles was wriggling all over in joy. Madame was crying, she was hugging both Wing and Bubbles at the same time. "Oh Wing, you dearest darling boy! Where did you find him! Oh Bubbles, you naughty thing, didn't you know that I was so worried about you! I thought you were gone forever!"

Then Dad was there, with his hand on Wing's shoulder, smiling. "What's all this, then?" Madame explained what had happened while still crying; Wing tried to offer her his handkerchief but it was covered with poppyseed crumbs. Luckily Dad had a clean one.

Later that night Dad told Mom what had happened and Mom hugged him and hugged him. 

It made Wing feel pretty good. He usually felt like he didn't really stack up as a Beifong much. Everyone knew Junior was the family genius; evil genius now maybe (at least that's how Wei referred to him and it was pretty rude but Wing couldn't really argue with it) but even still, the smart one. Huan was such a gifted artist and a gifted bender, too, even if he didn't use it to fight with. Opal was the only girl and she was smart too, and now she was an airbender and airbenders, they were so rare and special. And Wei, well, look at Wei! Wei always knew what he wanted, he was always so confident, so determined. Wei just walked into any situation, figured it out, made things happen. Look at him with the pro-bending! Wei had said a few years ago that he was going to be a pro-bender and Wing knew it would happen, he knew that once Wei made up his mind about something that he'd do whatever it took. Wing was so envious of that. He didn't know what he wanted for himself. Sometimes he felt like he was just drifting about, moving here or there, no direction. Wei, though. He didn't give a damn what anybody else thought, he did what he wanted, never looked back, never regretted anything. Wing, he sometimes agonized over even the simplest of decisions put in front of him. He wished he could be more like Wei.

He really wished he could be like Wei when it came to girls. Well, not that Wei cared about  _girls_ , because he didn't. But he wished he could be with girls the way Wei was with boys. When Wei saw a boy he liked he put on the charm; he was all smiles and smooth conversation, winks and muscle-flexing. Wei never had any problems finding a date if he wanted one. In fact, the only boy he'd ever seen Wei get all weird with was Bolin, but Wing was pretty sure that was only because Bolin was Opal's boyfriend and was therefore off-limits. (If if came down to an Opal vs Wei fight, Wing was putting his money on Opal. Sorry, Wei. He believed in twin solidarity, he did, but Opal was a Beifong woman. Mess with her at your peril.) Oh sure, Bolin was physically Wei's type but that was about it. If you asked Wing - which no one did, mind you - Bolin was way too nice for Wei. Wei liked a challenge, he liked it when boys played a little hard to get, when there was a little trouble there. Wei enjoyed a good fight, it's just how he was. Wing thought that Wei was mistaking Bolin being off limits for Bolin being hard to get, but whatever. He wasn't going to get into with Wei. But when it came to himself, though? He could talk to anyone, including girls, it wasn't that. He wasn't shy or anything. But if he saw a girl he thought was _pretty_? Completely different story. He'd get hot and prickly all over, lose the power of intelligent speech, find himself staring at the ground and mumbling something stupid. He hated it. Hated  _himself_. Girls were singularly unimpressed with him. He'd never even managed to kiss a girl. He'd never even come close. It was embarrassing. Frustrating, too.

He worked really hard at helping Mom and Dad rebuild Zaofu. He wanted to be helpful, for one thing; for another, he really did love Zaofu. He loved the way it was a city but felt like a small town; he loved how beautiful it was, how it married form and function with style and design. He loved how people always said hello to everyone else, how people were friendly and caring. He couldn't imagine living anywhere else. He didn't want to live anywhere else. 

Prince - or was it King? No one seemed to be sure - Wu came to Zaofu to recover from getting stabbed. Wing liked the guy, he was pretty funny. Not really what he expected from a prince, not that he had met all that many of them or anything. He was a bit hurt that Huan was able to talk to Wu about things that he hadn't been able to talk to Wing about but he shook it off. It was really good that Huan had a friend. Wing knew that Huan got lonely sometimes, even though most people wouldn't think it to be true. It was, though. Huan was different, yes, but he wasn't stupid and he was aware of it when people were either nervous around him or making fun of him. It took a lot to get Wing angry but making fun of Huan would get him angry every single time. To be fair to Huan, though, Wing had been spending a lot of time helping Mom and Dad and not so much time with either Huan or Wei. He missed Huan when he went back to Ba Sing Se with Wu, though. But he and Huan wrote, at least two or three times a week and Huan often sent him sketches of things. He talked about Yumi - Wu's bodyguard, she had been in Zaofu with Wu and seemed pretty nice albeit more than a little intimidating although Wing supposed that was a pretty necessary trait in a bodyguard - and he also mentioned Wu's new secretary. Huan seemed to like her although he said she was scary enough to keep Bolin and Mako's cousin Tu in line with just a word or two. Wing imagined some tall and imposing older woman, much like Yumi.

Imagine his surprise when they finally all made it up to Ba Sing Se to attend Wu's second coronation to find that Wu's new secretary was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen in his entire life.

He was rolling around on the rug in Wu’s room (he knew better, he did, he just got carried away in the moment sometimes, this often happened when Wei was involved) and heard a woman yelling at Tu; he looked up and into the darkest eyes he'd ever seen. Such a velvety dark brown as to almost be black, surrounded by a thick fringe of long black eyelashes.

He felt like someone had hit him on the head. _Hard._ Some part of his brain registered that this was Wu's secretary; another part of his brain registered that she was as young as he was and very short, with soft and generous curves, voluptuous everywhere in just exactly the way that he liked. But her eyes! He could hardly even make out the difference between the iris and the pupil they were so dark. They were so dark he was certain he would never be able to breathe again. He heard a terrible croaking noise and he was afraid, terribly afraid that he himself was making it. He couldn't seem to stop himself, though. She was looking right down at him and asking him something, her mouth was moving and sound was coming out but he couldn't focus on it because her eyes, those eyes were staring down at him.

He lay awake that night, staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. Oh Spirits, he'd made a fool of himself. Such a fool. He could feel his eyes filling up and he scrubbed at them angrily. Why was he like this? Why couldn't he be like Wei? If it had been Wei he would have come up off the floor with some witty remark, flashed a charming smile, in thirty seconds flat would have had Wu's secretary hanging off of his arm. Wing had seen him do it a million times with cute guys. 

Maybe he'd move to one of the air temples, become an air acolyte. No. Even air acolytes got laid, so obviously they didn't make assholes of themselves. Spirits! He'd gotten tongue-tied and shy before when he'd come across a pretty girl, but this? Staring at her like that? Making those noises? It wasn't even embarrassing. It was  _humiliating,_ that's what it was. What was  _wrong_  with him? 

He finally fell asleep.

She asked him to dance the next night. He'd only had eyes for her during the entire coronation; she was standing to the side of the stage, dressed in very formal robes, her hair all twisted up, thick coils of black atop her head, decorated with combs and flowers. He'd been distracted from her when Huan moved the sunshade thing for Mako and Bolin's grandmother (that was just beyond awesome, Spirits, he loved Huan so much). The rest of the time, though, he was staring at her. He was aware he was probably coming off as creepy. He tried to look at Wu or at the stupid orchestra or something, but it was no good. His eyes wouldn't obey him, they just kept going back to her.

It was at the reception when she approached him. Oh Spirits help him! She'd changed her clothes and she was wearing this dress that floated all around her when she moved and her hair had been re-done so that there were these little wispy bits around her face, he had no idea what they were called but the entire effect was lovely and she asked him to dance and he started making those horrible noises again, he  _hated_ himself. And! And! He had jam on his face! Like he was an infant or something! He wanted to die, wanted to sink through the ground itself. She tried to make conversation out on the dance floor but he had no idea what to say so he said nothing until he just blurted out, "Your eyes are like dirt."

He was thinking that her eyes were the same color as the special mulch that he and Madame used on her roses and that she - Nuo, her name was Nuo, her name was as beautiful as she was - looked like a rose herself, so delicate and pretty in that pink dress that was almost the same shade of dark pink as the roses from what he always thought of as  _his_  rosebush and oh, the swells of her full breasts and her hips and that sweet belly that her dress curved around, her skin all golden, she was like a flower, a lush blossom with its petals all unfurling and he loved roses so much and they had such meaning for him all those years caring for the roses and it was like taking care of Zaofu, too and she made him think of that, of all of those feelings he had about taking care of things, of making things bloom and Spirits, look at her, she was ripe and blooming everywhere but instead all that came out was  _dirt_.

He’d never been so mortified in his entire life. He went woozy with the horror of it, his stomach rebelling. The only reason he hadn’t run right then and there from the room was because he was completely frozen with shame.

He wanted to DIE.

He cried real tears that night. Bitter tears. He hid in the bathroom with his face stuffed into a towel so no one would hear him as he wept but Huan heard him anyhow and came in and Wing spilled it all, the whole story, while Huan sat on the floor next to him and listened. When he'd cried himself out Huan hugged him and said, "Don't be sad, we'll fix it," but Wing was pretty sure there was no fixing this one.

The next night was the mover night, though. And he banged into her, clumsy stupid oaf that he was, knocked right into her when he was going to get snacks and he kept apologizing, following her and whispering his regrets to her as they stood behind the projector, everyone else watching the mover. Suddenly she whispered, "This won't do at all," and she stood up on her tiptoes and threw her arms around his neck to pull his head down and kissed him and he was so completely shocked by this that he lost his balance and went down to his knees, taking her down with him but she didn't stop kissing him, she just threaded her hands through his hair and kissed him harder and he realized his own hands were in her hair only because he could feel the silky strands of it that had come loose in his fingers and his heart was going like crazy and he had his tongue in her mouth and hers was in his and it was amazing and she had pressed herself against him and all he could feel was how soft and yielding she was everywhere and she felt so good it was agonizing. She felt so right in his arms, so perfect, he never wanted to let her go. Suddenly she broke away from him and hissed, "Your brother!" and they both scrambled up, her desperately trying to pat her hair and robes back together and him trying desperately to readjust himself while stumbling back to where everyone else was sitting, his lips already chapped from the desperation of that kiss. It was only later that he realized he had one of her hairpins entangled in his tunic somehow. He had no idea how it had gotten there.

He didn't sleep very much that night either. But for an  _entirely_  different reason. He found a piece of paper and a pen and snuck back into the bathroom and lay on the floor and wrote her a letter, his calligraphy all scrawled in his urgency, telling her what he'd really meant by the dirt comment, pouring out his heart, telling her about Zaofu and roses and growing things and hell, he wasn't even altogether sure what he was writing, all he knew was that he was writing it from the heart.

He gave it to her before they left for Zaofu the next day but it didn't matter because Huan, bless Huan, he did what he said he would. He fixed it. He fixed it so that Wing and Wei could come back.

He and Wei returned to Ba Sing Se a week or so later. Mom and Dad let them take the airship; trains were still not all that safe in certain areas of the Earth Kingdom and there were no direct lines from Zaofu to Ba Sing Se anyhow thanks to the Si Wong desert being in the way. The airship left them off and there were Huan and Nuo to welcome them (Wu was in a meeting and Yumi, as always, was by his side) and Nuo got them situated in a room next to Huan's, just down the hall from Wu's. Wing was all tongue-tied again, but Wei of course had no such problems, just jabbering on as usual. That night they all had dinner in Wu's rooms; apparently this was how Wu and Yumi and Nuo and Huan always did it. Wing was slightly jealous of the ease and friendliness with which the four of them sat together. Oh, Nuo was very formal about certain things - Wu was always His Majesty and Huan was Mister Huan (and he and Wei were Mister as well) but even still, he could see that she was relaxed. Right before he and Wei turned in he gave Nuo another envelope. Inside was one of his roses that he'd pressed in the flower press he'd made for Madame as a birthday present a couple of years back. 

"This is the rose I meant," he managed to get out as he thrust the envelope into her hands before making a run for his bedroom. He really hoped she knew what he was talking about.

The next morning, when they all met in Wu's rooms for breakfast, Nuo had one of her usual robes on, her hair twisted neatly into efficient braids all pinned around her head. Into one of the braids she had placed a comb with a deep pink cloisonne rose.

She didn't say anything; however, she wore the same comb every day that Wing was in Ba Sing Se.

Somehow Wei had convinced some of the Dai Li officers to train with him during their off hours. Well, that was Wei for you; he could convince even perfect strangers to do what he wanted. Wing wished he had even a tenth of Wei's confidence. Wei was busy training, Wu was busy in meetings (Wu looked awfully tired; it was hard to remember sometimes that he was only two years older than Wing was, he had so much responsibility on his head), Yumi was with Wu and Nuo was either with Wu or doing administrative stuff. It left Wing to himself, wandering around. He wrote to Madame; he wrote to Mom and Dad; he wrote to Opal. He even wrote to Junior, even though Junior never wrote him back. Wei was pissed he was writing to Junior but Wing didn't care. He wanted to. He just didn't bring it up with Wei any longer.

About a week after they'd arrived Nuo showed up one morning with a man dressed in plain robes. She introduced him to Wing as Gang, the man who was in charge of the restoration of the Palace Conservatory. Gang was happy to get another warm earthbender body to work in the Conservatory; the fact that Wing was the cherished son of a noble and wealthy Earth Kingdom family seemed to faze him not at all, something Wing was grateful for. Wing happily put in the time. If Gang was surprised that Wing was able to name nearly every plant in the building he didn't show it. Wing was only sorry his drawing skills were so limited, but Huan was amenable to doing sketches for Wing to send back to Madame. She wrote him back and was especially excited about a certain breed of orchid that was quite rare; when Wing told Gang about it on one of their lunch breaks Gang told him that he could take a cutting back with him to Zaofu. Wing decided to keep it a surprise for Madame.

He'd stayed late one night working on a bed of rare yellow irises from the southern islands after the rest of the workers had gone back to their homes. He was happy, softly singing one of the traditional songs he'd learned as a child in Zaofu, one of the tragic ballads about Oma and Shu that he particularly loved. He assumed he was alone; he had one last iris to get into the soil and then he'd go and scrounge up some dinner.

"That's a beautiful song. Very sad, though." 

He jumped a little and turned his head to see Nuo sitting on one of the benches nearby. He had no idea how long she'd been sitting there.

He took a deep breath and tried to make his voice as steady as he could. "Ah, it's a song my father taught us when we were children. My father, he loves to sing."

"You have a lovely voice. A true tenor."

Wing felt his cheeks start to heat up. He didn't know what to say.

"Is that an iris?"

Wing looked down at the flower cradled gently in his hands. He nodded and then turned back to slide it carefully into the hole he'd prepared for it. "It's a very rare strain, it only grows on the southern islands. Well, grows naturally, that is. Most irises love sunlight but this one doesn't, that's why we had to plant it here, there's a fairly heavy tree canopy overhead, this bed is mostly shady. It's the only yellow iris in the world. Well, at least that anyone knows about. Normally you'd plant them as bulbs in the fall but these are transplants from a private year-round greenhouse." Spirits. Now he was babbling, like she cared about the stupid iris.

He heard the rustle of her robe as she picked her way across the grass to him. He quickly glanced over to see her bare feet peeping out from beneath the hem. Good thing, the heels she normally wore would sink right into the soft dirt.

He moved the earth ever so gently with his bending, feeling it snuggle up around the roots of the transplanted iris. He closed his eyes to make sure that the roots were fully supported. He gave the entire bed a final going over and then stood up, towering over Nuo without her heels on. She really was a petite woman. He felt like a great hulking earthbending brute standing next to her and it wasn't even like he was as tall as Junior or his father, either. "I...uh...I have to water these now." He filled a watering can he had near at hand from one of the spigots hidden around the Conservatory.

"Don't they have an automated watering system in here?"

"Uh, yes, but these are very fragile right now because they've just been transplanted, so they'll get hand-watered for a week or so. Just to make sure the soil doesn't shift too much." He carefully watered around each iris.

Suddenly she laughed. He'd never heard her laugh before and it felt like somebody had driven a spike right through him. Her laugh was delightful; an infectious little giggle that was completely at odds with her usual self-possessed and confident exterior. "Is this the dirt that my eyes are supposed to look like?"

He whipped around to see her standing next to a burlap sack that was full of the special black mulch he'd been using with the irises. He could feel the heat spreading across his entire face and over to his ears. Spirits, it probably covered his entire body at that point. "Uh..."

Oh someone help him, she was even more beautiful when she was smiling. She had two dimples right under the corners of her mouth - the same mouth that was curving up with her laughter, bringing out faint laugh lines around her eyes. She continued to laugh, her full breasts jiggling in the most distracting way. Wing tried to look anywhere but there and ending up looking at her hair. She had it out of its usual braided confinement; it was pinned up loosely, small wisps escaping around her heart-shaped face. Looking at her hair was not helping him regain his composure either, so he looked at the ground instead. His old standby.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't tease. It's just no one has ever compared me to dirt before." He might not be looking at her, but he could still hear the smile in her voice. He tried to find his own voice.

"I...I'm sorry, Miss Nuo, I didn't mean your eyes were dirty. None of you is dirty. I'm dirty. Well, I mean I've been in the dirt all day so I'm dirty but you probably never even get dirty..." He was making it worse. He fought an overwhelming urge to turn tail and run right out of the building, all the way back to Zaofu, never to leave again.

"It's just Nuo. And I understood that you weren't calling my eyes dirty. I'm just teasing you." He risked a glance up at her face and she put a hand to her mouth. "You do know the tips of your ears go red when you are embarrassed, don't you? It's really very cute."

Well, he hoped she really thought so because he could feel himself going practically incandescent with his own awkwardness. Any second now his ears were going to just burst into flames.

She kept smiling up at him. "Wing?" she said.

"Uh?"

"This is the part where you put down the watering can and kiss me."

Wing dropped the watering can. It fell over and dislodged a small flood that deluged his boots. He did not particularly care. "Uh..."

Nuo nodded. "I was afraid of this. Well, never mind." With that she daintily lifted up the hem of her robe, stepped up to him until she was pressed up against him.  "Wing?"

"Uh?"

"You'll have to bend down. Or we'll have to relocate to the bench over there so I can stand on top of it. Even on my tiptoes I can't reach."

"Uh...but I...I'm all dirty." He held out his hands to show her. His brain was quickly on its way to shutting down completely. 

"Wing Beifong, if you don't kiss me right now I might actually faint."

Well. He couldn't have that, could he? So he spanned his hands around her waist and easily lifted her up until her mouth was in the right place and then he kissed her for all he was worth, his hands sliding around her back to hold her in place. It wasn't very elegant - her poor bare feet were dangling above the ground and he knew he had to be getting her lovely robe completely filthy - but he didn't really care. She struggled to free her arms - he'd accidentally pinned them against his chest - and he moved her back a bit until she got them loose, throwing them around his neck. He pulled her right back in. He'd never in his life held a woman this close and as far as he was concerned he was going to do as long as humanly possible. She was so very plush everywhere. She smelled very good. Also, he had absolutely no experiencing kissing women but as far as he was concerned Nuo was aces at it. One of his hands moved up to cup the back of her head and his other hand slid down automatically to keep her balanced, curving around her luscious round bottom and without thinking he gave it a little squeeze. She responded by making a little gasping noise into his mouth and kissing him harder, curling both of her thighs around his hips to pull herself even closer, something that he hadn’t even thought possible at that point. A distant part of his mind realized that her robe had hiked up in order to accommodate what she was doing with her legs and the mere thought of her bare legs wrapped around him like that made him reel back a step, dizzy with desire. He needed to get a hold of himself; there were certain things going on in his anatomy which he was pretty sure she was probably figuring out by now and Spirits, he could at least attempt to be a gentleman about it. With his last ounce of self-control he carried her over to the bench she'd been watching him from and carefully sat her down on it before sitting down all the way on the other side of the bench. He tried to remember how to breathe. From the sound of it, she was trying to remember how to breathe as well. It took him a few moments before he was able to find his voice again, sliding his eyes over to glance at her. "Oh Nuo, I've gotten your pretty robe all dirty." He winced.

"Robes wash," she said. Her hair was sliding out of its pins and she started to remove them, the thick mass of her hair slithering down. It was straight and all one length; a far glossier black in color than Wing's own unruly black waves. It tumbled down her back to pool onto the bench. He wanted to plunge his hands into it and never take them out. He  _ached_  to do it. He already knew how soft her hair was. He quickly tucked his hands under his armpits.

"Your hair is very long," he said. For the love of Raava, could he not say  _anything_  intelligent? She must think he was a complete dolt. She smiled, though.

"People tell me I should get with modern times, that I should cut it all off, but I don't know. My great-grandmother told me when I was a little girl that hair was a woman's glory. It's so fine that it never will stay in its pins, though, I'm forever having to rescue it from going everywhere. I suppose I really should cut it, it's silly of me to keep it this long, it's just that it makes me feel beautiful." She stood up and showed him that it went past her hips; it reached nearly to her thighs.

Oh Spirits. She was going to kill him dead if she kept this up. He took a deep breath and tried once again to calm himself. "It’s beautiful," he said, and he meant it. He'd never seen anything like Nuo's hair. “You’re beautiful.”

She smiled again. "Thank you."

He still wanted to touch it so he ran his hands through his own hair instead, leaving a film of grime. "I'm sorry, I swear, I'm not usually this stupid. I swear to you I can have a conversation. I just...I don't know what happens to me when I see a beautiful woman, I open my mouth and nothing comes out."

"You told me in the letter."

"I just...I was afraid I had insulted you or hurt your feelings when we were dancing. I didn't want to. I wanted to be very romantic and admirable. Someone like Iroh is, you know? A gentleman, always with something charming to say, like he was doing while he was dancing with you. I wanted to say the right things so that you would know what I was feeling, so that maybe you'd feel the same way about me that I was feeling about you. Instead, I just made an ass of myself, as usual." He could feel his eyes filling up, and again he cursed himself. Why oh why couldn't he be someone else? This always happened to him, he got embarrassed too easily, cried too easily, everything emotional was on the surface for him. Usually he could push it away, hide what he was feeling and thinking and put on a good front. But Nuo was breaking all of his defenses right on down. He swiped at his eyes with his forearm.

Nuo said nothing, just looked at him for an endless moment with those dark, dark eyes. She scooted herself across the bench to lean forward and kiss him, tenderly, on his cheek. "You didn't hurt my feelings, Wing. Truly. Believe me, you didn't need to be Iroh, or anyone else. You didn't make an ass of yourself, not to me. I promise you, I understood how you were feeling and I was feeling the same way, too. Why do you think I'm here?" She pressed herself up against him. So soft, so soft everywhere. She was going to be the death of him, she was, she was. He looked down at her and frowned slightly, tracing a slightly shaking finger down her face. 

"Oh, I even got your face dirty, Nuo. I'm sorry."

"I don't care. I don't care anything about that. I just wanted to kiss you again. I didn't want to wait for you to wash up." She put her hands up to his face. "I've never met anyone as sweet as you. How is it that no girl has snatched you up before now?"

"Uh, because I can't actually speak to them? And if I do manage to speak to them I tell them their eyes look like dirt?"

That giggle rang out again. "I can see why that might cause problems. Wing Beifong, ladykiller of Zaofu."

He had to laugh at that. "Not even close, let me tell you."

"I'm glad," she said. "That means I got a chance with you. You’re the first man I’ve ever kissed, you know." She kissed him on the cheek again and he felt her smile on his face as her lips lingered there. "Oh my. Your face is heating up, I can feel it. My heart, oh my heart." Suddenly she pulled back. "Wing? Aren't you an earthbender?"

"Of course I am." He failed to see why this was important, especially since it meant she had pulled away from him. He didn't want her to do that. At all.

She nodded, her eyes dancing. "Couldn't you...you know...bend the dirt off of your hands? Or doesn't it work that way?"

His mouth dropped open. 

Nuo giggled that giggle and Wing dropped his forehead down to her shoulder. 

"Of course I can," he mumbled, dying a thousand deaths on the spot. "Spirits, I am the stupidest man that ever lived. I can't even think straight when you're near me."

Nuo just laughed and laughed as he carefully bent the dirt away from them both. When he'd finished he sat there for a few moments, thinking, Nuo sitting quietly beside him. She kept brushing her fingers over a spot on her robe that had been covered in dirt a few moments prior.

 Wing took a deep breath. "Nuo, would you like to go out on a date with me?"

She stared at him. "Pardon?"

"Would you like to go out on a date with me?"

She looked around the glade they were sitting in and then pointedly raised a single eyebrow.

"No look, hear me out. I do think you are beautiful and uh, I really like kissing you, uh, a  _lot_ , but well, I hardly know you. So I was thinking we could go out on a date. You know. Like people do. When they want to get to know each other." He smiled, a little uncertainly. 

"I see," she said. Suddenly the dimples appeared. "Well. In that case, I would love to go out on a date with you. Where shall we go?"

"Oh." He frowned. "Um, if this was Zaofu I know where I'd take you, but I have no idea what people do for dates in Ba Sing Se."

She threw up her hands. "Well don't ask  _me_. I certainly don't know!"

They both thought about this. 

"It's not like I can ask His Majesty, he has no idea either, I can promise you that. I'm certainly not taking you to the Lower Ring." Nuo tapped her fingers absently on the bench. "Well, I suppose we could go and see a mover. And go to dinner. Don't people on dates do that?"

"I think so?"

"I shall make the arrangements. How about the night after next, then?" Nuo looked thoughtful. "What kind of food do you like?"

"Well, most kind of food. I mean, I'm not very picky. Not like Huan or anything. Oh hey, Nuo! Do you like to go dancing?"

"On a first date?" She looked at him skeptically.

"Oh, good point. Okay, we can save that for later."

"Day after tomorrow, then. I will let you know what time." Nuo started to twist her hair into a loose braid.

"Wait, I thought I was asking you." Wing frowned a little.

"Well, really, Wing. I can promise you, I'm very good at making plans." She tsked at a strand of hair that refused to cooperate. Without thinking Wing took hold of it and shook her hair gently out of her hands before quickly braiding it up, securing it with the pins she handed him. "When did you learn to do that?" 

"Oh, sometimes I help out Huan with his hair. It doesn't look as nice as how you usually do it, I don't have much practice at that kind of thing."

"Well, I am not complaining! Thank you." Nuo stood up and straightened up the ruin of her robes, sliding her feet into her heels. "You may walk me back, now."

 

Wei laughed for ten minutes straight when Wing told him he was going out on a date with Nuo, asking him what the point of a date was when they had made out in the Conservatory. Wu, on the other hand, told him he thought it was an excellent idea and called his design house and told them Wing needed a suit made and delivered in twenty-four hours. Very handy, being a King, obviously you got to jump straight to the top of every queue. Wing had never worn a suit before; he'd always worn robes and tunic and trousers like they did in Zaofu. Wei was exceedingly jealous; he stomped around and sulked until Wu promised he could have a suit as well. Nothing would do then but that Huan got a suit and it went without saying that Wu would get a new one too. But Wing still had top priority.

The suit was delivered to the room he was sharing with Wei. It was a very handsome suit - in Metal Clan colors of green and black and silver, no less. He couldn't for the life of him understand the logistics of how the spats were supposed to go over his new shoes, however. He stared at them helplessly until he made a quick decision and walked down the hall until he came to Yumi's room. She was off-duty already; Wu had the Dai Li guarding him at night in his rooms. He knocked hesitantly and Yumi answered.

Wing held the spats out. "I can't figure them out," he said. "Can you help me, please?"

Yumi stared at him for a moment and then smiled. "Okay, let's go." She pointed back to his room. "Come on, Lover Boy, let's get you set up. Wouldn't do to look shabby in front of our Miss Nuo."

She came into his room - Wei was still off training, or at least that's where Wing thought he was, although with Wei you could never be too sure - and Yumi showed him how to align the spats properly and button them inside out so the buttons lay flat.

"Yumi, can I ask you a question?"

"Knock yourself out." She expertly tied his cravat for him. 

"Well...how do you...um. Well. Not that we've done anything like that or anything, but I'm just wondering, how do you please a lady? I mean..." Wing's face was going all hot and prickly again. "You know..."

Yumi clapped him on the back. "Right. Okay, take a seat." She straddled the desk chair and Wing sat down on the edge of his bed.

"I just...I don't know who else to ask. I mean, no point in asking either Wu or Wei obviously, and Huan's no help either. I don't want to do anything stupid."

"I'm assuming you know the basics, right?" Yumi lifted an eyebrow.

"Well, yeah, that! Of course! And I know about birth control too, my Mom made sure we all knew about that. Even Wei. Just in case."

"Well, that's good." Yumi thought for a moment. "The most important thing to remember is that all women are different. Which means that every woman is going to like something different. Now, Nuo - or any other lady, for that matter - may already know what she likes or doesn't like. Or perhaps not, depending on experience. So the most important thing you can do is ask her what she likes. Let the woman show you. Follow her lead. Good communication is the key. If it is someone you care about and you build a relationship then you should be figuring it out together, figuring out how to please each other. Don't just rush to the finish line. Take your time. Enjoy yourself. Don't be afraid to have fun. Which sounds obvious but it isn't, believe me."

Wing nodded. "Okay."

"You're not really a one-night stand kind of boy, are you, though? Not like your brother is." Yumi laughed. "The Dai Li still hasn't figured out what hit them."

Wing frowned. "I wish I was more like Wei. He's so smooth and charming. I get all stupid around girls."

Yumi leaned forward to cuff his shoulder affectionately. "Listen up, you. Your brother is a different boy than you are. Different man, I should say. No matter how many men he's had, they'll never add up to one Nuo and that's something that is most likely going to rear up and bite him in the ass one of these days. No, you stick to being you."

Wing sighed."Yeah. I guess."

Yumi cracked a grin. "Good boy. Now. I like you and I flat out adore Nuo, so I'm going to ask you a question. An extremely important question. Do you know what a clitoris is?"

"Uh...?"

Yumi reached across the desk to snag a pen and a sheet of paper. "Here. Let me draw you a picture while I explain. You can thank me later."

 

If you had asked Wing later what the mover was about he couldn't have told you; Nuo came to meet him in the hallway wearing another dress in that deep rose color, trimmed in green and that was it, his brain was simply gone. He didn't really know anything about clothes but she looked all swirly and lovely. She'd put fresh roses in her hair and she smelled divine. She looked him up and down and the dimples popped out; she complimented him on the new suit and he offered her his arm. They went to dinner at very nice restaurant - not too fancy but still nice, quiet enough that they could talk but not too empty. It was perfect. Of course it was. Nuo planned it. After dinner they watched the mover and then Nuo took him for a walk to look down at the lights of the city. He told her about Zaofu and his childhood there; she told him about her old neighborhood in the Lower Ring. He told her how adrift he felt; that unlike Wei he had no clear goals in life. She told him how her schooling had trained her to be such a perfect upper middle class citizen that she felt like she had no idea who she was any longer.

Wei was already in bed by the time he escorted Nuo to her room. Wing tried to be as quiet as possible and took off his suit in the bathroom; but when he came into the bedroom Wei was sitting up in bed waiting for him.

"You really like this girl, don't you?" Wei asked.

"Yeah." Wing crawled under his covers but turned to face Wei.

Wei was quiet for a few moments. "How come? I mean, I get that she's pretty, even I can see she's pretty."

Wing thought about it. "She makes me feel like no matter what I do, it will be all right. Even when I'm fucking everything up, it will be okay if she's there too." He frowned. "That probably sounds weird."

Wei shook his head. "No. No, I get it." He smiled at Wing and Wing smiled back; matching smiles. "I'm happy for you. I mean it. I really am."

He and Nuo went out on several more dates while he and Wei were still there in Ba Sing Se. They rarely saw Wu; when they did see him he seemed distracted, distant, a far cry from the man who'd had a smile for everyone back in Zaofu. Huan told Wing he was worried about him; Nuo said the same. Nuo was all for telling Mako but Yumi said that if they thought Wu was worn out and distracted now, having Mako around would make it fifty times worse. Huan said that Wu needed to get out of Ba Sing Se for a long weekend or something. Wing was struck once again how Yumi and Nuo and Huan circled around Wu the way they did. He supposed it was similar to how he and Wei looked out for each other.

He felt pulled apart from Wei. He still trained with him, of course; Wing loved both metalbending and earthbending, loved nothing more than a pick up game of power disc. It's just that Wei was devoted to training in a way that Wing wasn't. Wing was pretty sure Wei had been messing around in Ba Sing Se with one of the Dai Li guards (he was just Wei's type, big and kind of rough, attitude problem, Wei really did like his bad boys) but it wasn't really something they'd talk about. It wasn't a relationship. Wei didn't really do relationships. It's not that Wing thought he should or anything, it wasn't like that. Other people assumed that since they looked exactly alike they'd act exactly alike but nothing could be further from the truth. Wei and Wing had always been their own people. It's just that they'd always been their own people  _together_  and that was changing now. Price of growing up, he supposed. It made him sad, though.

Huan really meant it when he said that Wu needed a break; he contacted Mom and Dad and asked them if Wu could go there for a week's vacation. His parents immediately agreed. Wu announced to all of his various advisors that there'd be a week's break. They all took Wu's airship down to Zaofu (making a quick detour to drop off the Representative from Gaoling, whom Wu seemed to be very friendly with). Wing was very excited to show Nuo around Zaofu; for once he could plan the dates. He also wanted her to meet Madame. The morning they left he got up early to go to the Conservatory to take the promised slip of the orchid; he'd also gotten permission from Gang to take one of the yellow irises for her.

The airship landed at Zaofu and his parents were both there, waving. Wing knew that Huan had contacted Aunt Lin to see about Mako meeting them there but he was on a case right now that couldn't be interrupted; she promised she'd send him to Ba Sing Se as soon as it was all tied up. Wing felt for Wu, he really did. They all took the tram into the Beifong compound and Mom had one of their guest houses set up for Wu and Yumi and Nuo. Chef outdid himself at dinner; he'd made all of Wu's favorites and of course Wu complimented him extravagantly. After dinner Wing asked if he could steal Nuo for a few hours and Wu just smiled; he told Wing to steal Nuo all he liked, that Nuo was on vacation as well.

They took the tram into the center of town and walked the short distance to Madame's home, Wing handling the box with her orchid cutting and the yellow iris very carefully. Nuo was full of questions: why the spoke formation (cut down on traffic while keeping the neighborhoods connected), who could live in Zaofu (anyone, really, being a metalbender - or a bender at all - was not a requirement although metalbenders did make up a majority of the population), what kind of schools (no private, very good public ones and all children in Zaofu went to school) and so on. He stopped at Madame's little fence (and made a note that it could use a coat of paint; he'd get on that as soon as possible) and showed her his rosebush. It was late autumn now, so no blooms, but even so. They walked up to the door and Wing knocked; Bubbles immediately started up with his noise. "Bubbles, hush! It's me!" Wing called through the door and Bubbles went nuts with excitement.

Madame came to the door, all smiles. "Wing! You're home!" She hugged him, hard. "And you must be the Nuo his letters are full of." She gave Nuo a little bow.

"Madame Nuying, it is my pleasure to meet you," said Nuo, bowing right back. Madame invited them in and was thrilled to bits with the orchid cutting and the iris bulbs. She served them both a piece of her famous poppyseed cake - Nuo's eyes actually fluttered shut in rapture when she put the first bite in her mouth - and she asked Nuo friendly questions about Ba Sing Se and working with Wu. Bubbles got a little worked up (as Bubbles was wont to do) and tried to climb up Nuo's leg; she stared down at him and said, "Certainly  _not_ ," and Bubbles scurried over to hide behind him while he tried not to laugh with his mouth full.

Wing promised to bring Nuo back for another visit before she left (and told Madame he'd be by the next week to see to her fence) and they walked together to the nearest tram stop. Folks waved hello or called out greetings; several people asked if it was Miss Nuo from Ba Sing Se on his arm and greeted her with friendly curiosity. Jin from the green grocers shop stuck his head out as they walked past and asked Wing if he wouldn't mind taking a basket of fresh scallions that Chef had ordered back to the compound. (Wing didn't.) He climbed a tree to fetch down a cat owl that had gotten its paw stuck for a small girl; he picked up a stray piece of paper and put it in the nearest trash can while explaining to Nuo how his parents were hoping that Zaofu would get a university one day. He was so happy to finally get a chance to show Nuo his own beloved city.

They sat in the tram on the way back to the compound - Wing with the basket full of scallions on his lap - and suddenly Nuo leaned in to kiss him on the cheek.

"What was that for?" he asked in surprise.

"I thought you told me that you had no clear goals in life," she said, smiling.

"I don't," he protested.

"Really?" she said. "I heard several goals tonight. You will be painting Madame Nuying's fence. You will be calling someone to go and take a look at that charming lotus fountain in the park because it’s running a little sluggishly. You will be going to visit the very nice old man who broke his leg to take him to library since he is out of reading material. You are going to have a word with someone's son who has not been doing his homework to remind him that school is important. You promised the man at the green grocer's to ask your mother to put forth the idea of getting more frequent street cleaning on the monthly town hall meeting agenda.

Wing shrugged. "Those aren't goals, Nuo, they're just everyday kind of things. Believe me, Wei and I weren't even very good at school, not like Junior was, or Opal. Or you, even. I was never the brains of the Beifong family, sorry to say. I was talking about some sort of goal for my future. You know, some sort of profession. Knowing what I want to do when I grow up, that kind of thing."

"Oh, Wing," she said, and she laughed while kissing him again, on the mouth this time. "You'll be running a city when you grow up, you dearest, lovely man."

 

He hated it when she had to go back to Ba Sing Se with Wu. He knew that Wu needed her, it wasn't that. He'd never paid much attention to politics before but Nuo was incredibly knowledgeable and he couldn't help but pick some of it up just by being around her. She wrote to him, told him that in the airship on the way back to Ba Sing Se that Wu sat down next to her and asked her very seriously if she planned on staying with him until his abdication or if she was going to head back to Zaofu.  _I know better than to ask if you are coming with me to Republic City_ he said, and smiled. Nuo told him she wanted to stay until the abdication and of course Wing agreed. How could he not agree? For one thing, he didn't own Nuo and for another? She was important to Wu and Wu needed her more. The Earth Kingdom needed her more. Wing could wait. Besides, he had plans of his own.

He sat down with his parents and told them that when the time came and Wu had abdicated he was planning on bringing Nuo back to Zaofu. His parents seemed genuinely happy for him; both Mom and Dad liked Nuo and Mom especially had nice things to say about her. Wing was a little surprised and said so later to his father and Dad told him that both he and Mom had seen how happy Wing was and in any case, Nuo had sat down with his mother and had a little chat with her about Wing. Wing couldn't help but laugh when he heard that. Leave to Nuo to just walk right up to whatever elephant koi might possibly be in the room and smack it one upside the jaw. Ah, he loved her for that, he really did.

He asked Dad if he would be willing to draw up plans so that he and Nuo could have their own home. In the Beifong compound, of course; Wing didn’t see the point of moving across the city and having to go back and forth all the time. His father was so pleased to be asked that Wing found himself carrying some regret that he hadn’t taken more of an interest in his previous work. Wing was no architect but he enjoyed the time with Dad in his office, putting together something that he hoped Nuo would love. One night he was sitting with both of his parents, sharing a bottle of wine together, looking over the house plans while listening to Mom reminding Dad that Nuo was short and would need a closet sized accordingly and he was suddenly struck with a feeling of _rightness_. He was happy. Utterly happy. He loved Zaofu. He loved his parents. He loved Nuo. He leaned over to hug and kiss his father who looked surprised and then pleased; his mother laughed when he did the same for her.

“What was that for?” Mom asked, looking up at him, cocking her head to the side like she always did.

Wing smiled. “I’m happy. I love you both. Thank you for doing this for Nuo and me.” Both of his parents wrapped their arms around him and held him for a long time.

Wing consulted with an engineer to help him divert the river that ran through the compound into a small stream that curved around the back of the house, through the garden that he and Madame were just starting there. (He thought of Junior often as he worked with the engineer but he said nothing. It still hurt too much to say anything. Wing suspected it always would.) Wing took careful cuttings of his own rose from Madame’s house and planted them in a spot of honor in his own garden and Madame insisted he take some of the rare yellow iris bulbs from the original yellow iris he’d brought her and plant those as well. He planted moon peach and plum trees; he planted climbing roses into a trellis that framed the path that led to the front door. It would take some years before the roses covered the trellis but Wing was a patient gardener. He could wait. He knew Madame wouldn’t be around to see them - she was in her eighties by now, and while still quite hale she had slowed down quite a bit - and that brought a pang to his heart. One day it would be a beautiful garden. It would be Madame’s legacy as well as his own.

When Wu finally left Ba Sing Se for good Nuo came back with the Beifongs to Zaofu. They got off the tram from the airfield and she started to automatically go towards the main house; Wing took her hand in his and pulled her over to where their own house was located. Nuo loved the house. She went from room to room, gasping in delight, clapping her hands like a girl. She especially loved her little vanity table area. Huan had done the mirror as a wedding gift for her, silver flowers entwined around the frame, highlighted with softly glowing gems. The rest of the house was beautifully spacious and full of light; graceful and soaring like everything else his father designed. Nuo’s closet was cleverly built so that she was able to bring everything easily to reach and she couldn’t stop talking about it. The first night she spent in Zaofu they ate dinner in the main house with his parents and Wei and it was like she’d always been a part of the family.

Their wedding was a beautiful thing. Both Mom and Nuo were in their element making all of the plans for it. (Wing was in charge of the flowers, however. That was his area.) The day itself was a gorgeous sunny day in late spring; not too hot, not too cool. The only thing to mar the entire day was the absence of Nuo’s family. Nuo had taken Wing to meet her parents in Ba Sing Se when Wu had finally abdicated and it did not go well. Her parents had made it very clear that if Nuo married Wing she would no longer be welcome in their home. They, like many others in the former Earth Kingdom, blamed the Beifong family for what Kuvira and Junior had done. Nuo sobbed her heart out that first night in Zaofu; after that she wouldn’t talk about it again. Wing wasn’t sure this was the best approach - he was more of a work through your feelings kind of guy himself - but he didn’t push her on it. If she wanted to talk, he was there, and she knew it. He left it at that.

He cried for joy when Nuo told him she was pregnant, kissing her through his happy tears until she was breathless and in tears herself.

Their twin girls, Orchid and Iris, were born a month early on a blustery spring morning the day before his shared birthday with Wei. Wing was an hour’s drive outside of town dealing with a tree that had blown across the train tracks when his friend Eun came flying down the road on his motorcycle, shouting at Wing that his wife was in early labor and why the hell wasn’t he answering his radio? Wing gunned it the entire way home, the jeep swerving and skidding in the mud that was still all over the roads. By the time he got there Orchid was already out and squalling, held securely in her grandmother’s arms. Nuo herself was being supported in Wei’s embrace while his father was holding her hand and talking her through Iris’s impending arrival. He caught Iris in his hands while the waterhealer smiled her approval. The whole thing went so fast he hadn’t even managed to get his bright yellow rain poncho off. 

The girls weren’t identical - not like he and Wei were - but they both had their mother’s dimples, which delighted their father to no end. They were happy and exuberant babies, doted on by their grandparents and the citizens of Zaofu. Everywhere they went in the city the girls were given cookies, flowers, cheek pinches and kisses. Madame especially enjoyed them, and the girls were never happier than when sitting in the dirt in her backyard garden, romping with Bubbles and using their clumsy baby bending to splatter each other with mud, laughing uproariously.

Zaofu started to refer to them as Nuo’s Garden. Nuo was pleased, Wing knew. Motherhood suited her; softened her, brought more smiles and laughter into their already happy home. He was the only Beifong sibling left now - Junior in prison, Opal and Wei in Republic City, Huan gone who knows where with Ikki - and his mother decided to leave the big dining room for when they had guests. His father converted part of the kitchen into a sunny breakfast room, and that’s where they started to have family meals. Wing loved the casual intimacy of it, loved the sense of warmth and family the smaller space fostered.  

Three years after the twins came little Rose, who shot out feet first and took such a grip on Wing’s finger when he held her for the first time that he lost all feeling in it. Parents weren’t supposed to play favorites, but from the start Rose had him wrapped around her own tiny little finger. Once she was weaned he tied her securely to him in a sling and took her with him everywhere. Unlike her older sisters Rose was a quiet baby; she wasn’t given to much in the way of baby babble or even crying. But she watched everything around her with her mother’s dark eyes. She had Nuo’s dimples as well, and showed them to her father whenever he’d sing to her.

Time passed; Nuo was pregnant again (he was genuinely thrilled and was hoping for another girl, he found he quite enjoyed his little garden of girls) and after Opal and Bolin’s wedding things calmed down again. He was working in his own back garden - Rose was next to him, her own little earthbending hands in the dirt, the Beifong bending genes had so far run true in all of his girls - when his father came and sat on a bench next to him, waving a letter from Huan. His father read the letter aloud as Wing continued to work. Huan and Ikki had made their way to the wreck of the Northern Air Temple; Huan had sent a few sketches. It had been a long time since Wing had heard such excitement in his father’s voice. “I don’t know, Wing. Maybe your mother and I could go up there. Just for a little while. I never saw it, you know, and Susi saw very little before it was destroyed. Huan says that some of the foundation work is still good. I guess I could go and have a look. I haven’t really done any work like that in years.” Rose crawled into her grandfather’s lap to show him a chunk of quartz she’d found somewhere. (Perhaps she had bent it up. Both Wing and his mother suspected that little Miss Rose was going to be a very good earthbender indeed.) He sat back on his heels to smile up at his father.

“You should go. When’s the last time you and Mom had a vacation, anyhow? The wedding didn’t count.”

“Too right it didn’t.” His father smiled back at him, that gentle smile Wing had always loved.

“Go, Dad. Take the airship. Take Mom. Go and see what Huan’s fussing about, take your time. Enjoy yourselves. We’ll be fine here.”

His father frowned a bit. “I don’t know, son. Nuo’s due pretty soon.”

Wing shrugged and hauled himself up to sit on the bench next to his father. “Dad, it will be fine.” It wasn’t like his father couldn’t take it at least a little bit easy. His father would be sixty-two in a few months. He was still a very vigorous man, but Wing was of the opinion that he worked too much, an opinion he knew both his mother and his wife shared. Not to say that he probably wouldn’t jump into whatever it was Huan was doing up there with two feet, but at least it wouldn’t be a city’s worth of work. Or at least Wing hoped not. “Seriously. Take a trip. Nuo and I will handle things on this end, new baby or not.”

His father grinned suddenly. “It would be fun, wouldn’t it? Getting to travel with your mother, poke around the ruins? I still can’t believe Huan’s sleeping in a rock tent up there. Ikki’s been good for him, hasn’t she?”

“Yeah. She has.” Rose handed him the chunk of quartz and he stared at it closely. Where on earth had she gotten it from?

“Must be nice, just traveling where they want to like that. I never did do much of that, you know. By the time your mother found me her traveling days were pretty much over.” His father looked a little wistful. Wing slung an arm around his shoulder and squeezed.

“Just do it, Dad.”

They did it. A week later he and Nuo stood at the edge of the airfield, waving at his parents as their airship slowly lifted itself into the air and started on its way north. Orchid and Iris had already lost interest and were chasing each other up and down the path, laughing uproariously; Rose was sitting up on his shoulders, small fingers curled gently around his jaw for balance. Nuo was leaning up against him, and his hand rested on her belly. He smiled when the baby gave a solid kick under his hand.

“Ooof,” said Nuo. “That’s right, baby, kick your father a good one. Just so long as you quit kicking my bladder. I have to pee _again_.”

Wing grinned down at her. “Why Miss Nuo! Are you trying to teach our child that violence is the answer?”

Nuo rolled her eyes at him. “If it will get me off of these swollen lumps I call feet to the nearest toilet I will.”

Wing laughed and then bent down to easily swing her up into his arms. “Off your feet, then. Can’t have our unborn child learning that kind of thing.”

“Wing! Put me down this very instant!” Nuo tried to look stern but her dimples betrayed her. Wing made sure he had her evenly balanced (not the easiest thing these days) and started to walk up the path to the tram.

“Hang on tight, Rosey-Posey,” he said, and Rose tightened her grip on the sides of his head. Orchid and Iris ran up, giggling.

“Daddy! Are you going to carry Mommy the whole way?” Orchid asked, skipping along next to him, swinging Iris’s hand as she skipped along as well.

“I sure am,” he answered, winking down at his girls, and Nuo snorted.

“Silly man,” she said, and rolled her eyes at him again. He stopped to pull her up higher so he could kiss her.

“Daddy’s kissing Mommy!” sang out Iris, and that set off another round of twin giggles.

“Take me home, husband,” Nuo said with a smile, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, making sure she had a secure arm around Rose as well. “Whoosh whoosh.”

Surrounded by his beautiful flowers, Wing made his way home.


	5. In The Outskirts And In The Fringes: Huan Beifong

People always talk about their first memories but Huan doesn’t really have one. He’s never been really sure which memory goes where, much as he is never sure what time it is. Day? Month? Sometimes even the year slides out of his head and thinking about the future makes him feel so anxious that that feeling creeps in, that feeling that someone is pushing down on his chest and making him want to weep, so he tries not to think about the future too much.

Little things stand out for him with perfect clarity, though. The feel of his grandmother’s hands, the rough and dry texture of them. The jagged taste of the sour plum balls his mother always gave him to try and stop the sick feeling in his belly when he got into any kind of moving vehicle. The look of wonder on Ikki’s face as the bracelets swirled from his wrists onto hers. Kuvira’s eyes, cold and hard, staring down at him.

He doesn’t like to remember the last one. But he can’t help it. He tries not to, he tries to put other things in his head, tries to distract himself, but as always, his brain refuses to obey him.

He remembers being unhappy when he was small, that much he remembers. He remembers too the feeling of elation, of exultation, of utter _rightness_ when the metal finally moved itself into his hands. He didn’t need to speak to the metal, didn’t need to find the words that made sense to others, he could just touch it and shape it and it was so easy, so good, so right. So right. So _right_.

Sometimes, the words won’t come at all, they can’t get past the tangle in his mind. Sometimes they come, but they snarl and bleed into each other and he can’t make them obey, he means to say _I don_ _’t care for seaweed noodles_ in the polite way his mother taught him to refuse a food he couldn’t bear to have in his mouth but all that comes out is _my tongue can_ _’t hold them_ and that’s how they feel, they move in his mouth in ways that he can’t control and push along his teeth and the taste of them makes his throat close up and he knows this, he _knows_ this, but the words won’t leave his head and make their way out of his mouth. And then people stare at him, stare at him like they have always done; some with pity, some with anger, some with disgust. Sometimes he isn’t sure what the looks on their faces mean.

That’s how it always is with people. Sometimes the words out of their mouths don’t match the looks on their faces and that confuses him, he’s not sure which he is supposed to believe or respond to and he invariably picks the wrong thing, he reacts to the wrong thing and then people get impatient with him and he always wants to scream at them _I_ _’m trying my best_ but when he does that people get angry and tell him to calm down when they are not being calm themselves.

Why must he always calm down? Why is it always _him_ that must do it?

He tried to explain all of this to Grandma once and the words got tangled up and he got so frustrated that he started to cry and he hit himself in the head, not because he wanted to hurt himself but because he just wanted to words to come out and Grandma, she took his hands in hers and she told him, _Huan, I will help you with this, do you trust me to help you_ and he did, he trusted Grandma, Grandma did not understand how it felt to have the words stuck in your head, she told him this, but she knew how it felt to not be able to see, to have no understanding of what it meant when people said the sky was blue or that someone looked sad.

So she taught him, she taught him to use his bending, to feel the heartbeat of someone else, to know and understand when that person was saying something true or saying something not true. It wasn’t perfect - he came to realize that sometimes people believed what they were saying to be true, even if he knew it was not true - but it helped. It helped.

Like when Yuke told him that he wasn’t capable of loving anyone. That wasn’t true, he knew how to love. He loved. But she believed it when she said it and it shook him, it hurt him so deeply that he went into a dark place, he couldn’t get out of it, he could only lay there and think _not true not true but what if it is true what if I can_ _’t love what if these feelings I have for Mom for Dad for Grandma for Wing for Wei for Opal for Wu for Nuo are not real what if I can’t what if I can’t_ and it wasn’t until Wu came to his bedroom, all unexpected, came with his baby in his arms, came and lay down on the bed with him, with the baby in between and said _tell me_ and Huan said _I don_ _’t know how_ and then Wu said _show me then_ and Huan cried and said _I can_ _’t_ and Wu said _okay then I_ _’ll just lay here with you and Zhi, we’ll just be here together so you know I love you_ and he wasn’t sure why but his brain let him say _she told me I can_ _’t love_ and Wu, he knew what Huan meant and he said, _put your foot on the floor so you know that what I am saying is true_ and then Wu told him that he knew how to love, that he was a good loving person and that Yuke did not get to tell him what he felt or didn’t feel for anyone and he could sense that Wu was telling the truth and Wu said _who do you believe and more importantly, what does your heart tell you a_ nd he said _I love I love I love I love_ and he wanted to say more but the words wouldn’t come but Wu just smiled, that big smile that after all this time Huan recognized as Wu’s real smile not the polite smile he gave to people he didn’t love and Wu said _yes of course you do_ and then it was better. It was better.

He loved. He did. _He did._

He still didn’t know why things were harder for him than others. He didn’t know why things that hurt him didn’t hurt others. He understood that it was true, of course. He understood that he was different. He’d understood he was different forever, he couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t different. He knew he couldn’t make himself be the same as others, he tried sometimes but it was like when he tried to force a sculpture into a shape it didn’t want, the metal wouldn’t hold no matter what he did, there were limits, he had to know and respect the limits or else the structure, it wouldn’t hold. He was the same. There were limits to what he could do and if people didn’t respect those limits he’d buckle and sway and gape apart, just like the metal would.

Things are hard in Zaofu. People have expectations of him that he doesn’t know how to fulfill. The teachers tell him how smart his brother is, how smart Junior is, and Huan knows this. Junior is smart. Huan goes to school for the first time and some days are fine and other days are not and at first he doesn’t understand why this is. The sound the door to the outside play yard makes is not fine. It scrapes and whines and it hurts him to hear it. He tries to tell the teacher but she is impatient and tells him to stop speaking, so he stops but the sound doesn’t stop and he can no longer hear her voice over it and he can’t even hear his own voice but the teacher is shouting at him, telling him to stop making the noise he’s making and he needs her to stop shouting but she won’t and he covers his ears and he wants to tell her what is wrong, he wants to he _needs_ to but the words aren’t coming and instead he screams and her desk is wrenched across the room and her with it and his parents come to the school and take him away and they tell him, _you can never do that again, you can_ _’t bend when you are angry, Huan, you have no control you could hurt someone_ and he never meant to hurt anyone he just wanted the sound of the door to stop but no one asks him, no one asks why. So he draws a picture of the door and he takes it to Junior and he hands it to him, a plea for understanding, and Junior looks at it and he frowns and he says, _is there something wrong with the door_ , and Huan wants Junior to fix it but the words are still not coming and Junior holds his hand out and says, _come on_ , and they walk to the school together and Huan takes him to the door and he manages to say _bad sound_ and Junior frowns he way he always does when he is thinking hard, when he is figuring things out and he says, _the door is making a bad sound_ and Huan nods and Junior opens and closes the door and Huan’s hands fly to his ears and Junior says _it_ _’s squeaking I can fix it_ and he tells Huan to sit still and not move and Huan waits, trusting Junior will come back to him and he does, and he has something in his hands and he does something to the door and then moves it and says _is the sound gone is it better, Huan_ And it is better, the sound is gone and Huan cries and cries because the sound is gone and he is so relieved and Junior sits down next to him and tells him it is okay, it is always okay that he will always help him.

But then Kuvira comes and slowly that Junior, he goes away. Huan doesn’t know why. He doesn’t like the new Junior, the Junior he thinks of as Kuvira’s Junior. This Junior doesn’t always help Huan, even though he promised. This Junior lies sometimes, to Huan, to Mom and Dad. This Junior gets angry.

Once Kuvira’s Junior tells Huan that he is an embarrassment and it hurts Huan so deeply so badly so much that he doesn’t know what to do with all of that feeling inside and he goes to his atelier, his space, his safe space, the space that Mom says is all his and he tears things apart, he tears the metal apart, his sculptures apart because those sculptures belonged to a time when Junior was Junior and now he isn’t any more and Huan can’t bear to look at them any longer. Mom comes running and she says _oh Huan! Huan! why?_ And he can’t tell her, he can’t find the words to tell her, all he can do is gesture at the twisted ugly mass of what used to be but Mom doesn’t understand. She wants to, he knows this. But he can’t explain and in the end she just sits on the ground with him and tells him that it is okay. It isn’t okay but he knows that Mom wants to help him.

He wishes Grandma would come back but Grandma doesn’t.

He loves his family. He loves Wing’s sweetness, he loves Opal’s kindness, he loves Wei’s protectiveness. He loves that his mother never tries to change him. He loves his father’s gentleness. He loves Junior, too, but that love feels like it has hooks and barbs and sharp things that rend at him and he doesn’t know how to fix it.

The only thing that makes him feel better is his art. He goes to school because he is told he must but he doesn’t learn much there. He learns by reading and by finding things out for himself. School is always about rules and clocks and it makes him so tired.

He is not stupid. He knows people mock him. He hears what they say. It hurts. They think he has no feelings but he does. He is not an automaton. Every day is another invocation of what he does wrong. _Look at me when I speak to you. Put your hands down. Be quiet. Don_ _’t do that. Do that. Why can’t you just be normal._

He tries. He tries so hard to be what he thinks everyone wants him to be but he fails again and again. He can’t understand why and he’s so weary. So weary. Some days he is so weary he can’t bear to even leave his room, that place where everything is his, where everything is where it should be, where he knows each and every sound, every texture, every smell.

When he leaves school it gets better. He does not leave their compound much. His family understands him, he can relax with them. He loves his little brothers. They never think of him as odd; he asked Opal why this was so once and Opal said it was because they had grown up with him. He can ask Opal these questions; she will always answer if she can, he knows.

But the wind comes to Opal and she leaves. And there is a hole there, a hole in their home and he can’t bear it. Mom and Dad talk about things happening in the world and these things touch Zaofu as well. Their yard was full of lava! Strange people come in and out of the compound, his unknown Aunt comes, a woman who does and doesn’t look like his mother, an angry woman, she has nothing to say to him and he keeps away from her. The boy that never shuts up mocks his sculpture, Huan is so tired of it. Opal leaves and Wing and Wei are crying and Huan cannot cry in front of these strange people so he hides behind his hair and refuses to speak.

He does not want to be anywhere near Kuvira but she comes to him after Opal leaves. She tells him she is going to Ba Sing Se, a city he does not want to see. She wants him to come with her, she says. She needs someone with his kind of powerful bending. Huan is afraid of her. She lies. She always lies. She says things that are not true but her heartbeat, it does not change and Huan does not understand. How can she say things she knows are not true, things she knows are lies, but her heart does not change? He wants to ask Grandma but Grandma is gone, she has been gone for so long. He tells her he won’t go with her and he tries to walk away but she stops him, she puts her arms around him and he hates that, he does not like to be touched, he can never tell, will the touch hurt? Will it soothe? He can’t tell and so he doesn’t want to be touched but she touches him anyway, she won’t let him get away, he tries to break free but she holds him and she tells him that she knows that he wants her and he does not understand what that means, he does not want anything from her unless it is for her to leave him alone and then she pushes him into a wall and puts her mouth on his and Huan is not stupid, he knows what a kiss is, but this is not what he wants. He sees how people kiss, like his mother and father, his mother closing her eyes and smiling, even Wei and the boys he sneaks into Grandma’s old cottage, whispering and laughing, they want to be kissing, even _he_ can understand that, but this is not right. _He does not want it._ He tries to break free of Kuvira but she gets angry, tells him he is stupid, that he is a waste of time, that he is a terrible bender and ugly and that she does not want him, and that no woman will ever want him, that he is damaged, stupid, that if she had a child like him she would have killed the child and saved everyone the trouble. He already knows these things about himself. Does Kuvira think to hurt him with these words? He already knows. _Don_ _’t touch me_ he says and he tries again to pull away but she won’t let him. _Think you_ _’re better than me, don’t you_ she says and that’s not true but he doesn’t want to say it - he doesn’t want to say anything - he just wants to get away from her, and he tugs and tugs but she digs her fingers into his arms and it hurts and he is starting to panic, he can’t get any breath in and she is saying something again but he can no longer hear her and in desperation he does what he promised Mom and Dad he would never do, he bends when he is out of control, the metal from the railing nearby lashing through the air and catching Kuvira by surprise, wrapping around her body and throwing her to the side. And now she’s really angry, she’s furious, and she takes the metal and sends it back to him but he closes his eyes, the way Grandma always showed him and he _feels_ it coming, and he sends it away from himself, so easily, right back towards her and suddenly he can no longer feel her and he opens his eyes and she’s gone. He puts the railing back so carefully that no one will ever know it was gone.

He goes to Junior when Junior tells the family that he is going with Kuvira to Ba Sing Se. He tells Junior what happened.

Junior is so angry, so angry he shoves Huan, shoves him to the ground, calls him a liar, screams at him, tells him that he is jealous because Kuvira loves Junior and it’s Junior she wants and Huan tries to explain, tries to tell him he is not lying but Junior leaves and Huan hurts so much inside, the pain of it shocks him. He doesn’t know what to do.

He dyes his hair green. The jealous color. A little fuck you because even broken weird damaged waste of time Huan Beifong can say fuck you sometimes.

It gets better with Junior gone. He works on his art. He gets better. People start to buy his art and he spends a few months with his other grandmother, Grandma Bhuti, his father’s mother, the artist and he learns a lot from her. He spends time sketching, practicing his fine motor skills. He was clumsy for so many years he surprises himself with how well his hands obey him. He spends time with his younger brothers and the three of them build something new from the gaping holes where Junior and Opal had been. One day, for fun, he grabs Wei and hangs on to him and shows him a trick that Grandma taught him when he was small, he sends the both of them flying across the earth; smoothly, zipping around corners, racing about the compound. Wei screams and whoops with joy and Wing jumps up and down, demanding his turn. They do it for hours until his hair is a tangled mess and they are all three of them starving and descend upon the kitchens to eat and he’s laughing at something Wing said and he catches his mother standing at the door to the kitchen, smiling at the three of them and he smiles back and then Wei makes an outrageous comment that causes her to chase him around the kitchen snapping a towel at him and Huan realizes that he’s happy. In that moment, that is what happy feels like.

He knows things are getting worse with Kuvira. He sees the strain on his parents. There are whispers that even he can’t ignore; camps where people are being imprisoned, Kuvira’s army forcing people into submission.

He doesn’t want to believe that Junior would be a part of that. But he thinks that Kuvira’s Junior would. Kuvira’s Junior would do anything for Kuvira. Leave home. Leave them all behind. Leave Huan behind. Forget all of his promises, lie, become something mean, someone cruel.

Huan wants his own Junior back.

Huan doesn’t pay all that much attention to what is happening in the world but even he knows the Avatar has gone missing. He can see how relieved both of his parents are when she arrives in Zaofu with three airbending children at the same time as Kuvira, as Opal. As Junior.

Mom leaves with the twins in the middle of the night and the Avatar goes with Opal and Jinora, the oldest airbender girl. He knows he can’t help, he can’t be of use, but he gets dressed anyhow and goes to the two children left behind. The boy, he is strutting about the compound, shouting defiance, but of course Huan knows it is all a lie, he can sense his heart slamming in his body. The girl though, she turns to him and her lower lip trembles. _I_ _’m scared_ she says, and he doesn’t want her to cry. His father tells them to get dressed and suggests they pack and saddle the air bison, just in case. That at least is something he can help with. When they have done that he takes them with him into his atelier and gives them paints and tells them that sometimes when he is upset he paints to feel better. He tells them to show him what they look like on the inside. He hopes this will distract them and he is curious to see what the children will paint. The boy, he is a gifted artist, but he draws himself in some sort of ridiculous royal robes, still trying to pretend that he is not frightened. The girl, though, she draws herself smiling, surrounded by spirit animals. He likes the drawing. He likes her. She is very truthful. She has a little sugar glider with her and she talks to it while she’s painting. He compliments her on the painting and her face lights up.

Her sister comes then, in spirit form, tells them they must leave. He takes them both up in his arms and moves them quickly across to where the air bison is, skimming over the ground. The boy leaps up to the saddle, still shouting, but the girl turns to him. Ikki. Her name is Ikki. Her eyes are full of tears and he wants to say something, say the right thing, but he knows he is no good at that. He lifts her up by her waist and whispers into her ear _fly, little bird_ and then he tosses her up to the saddle. He hopes it is enough. Her face staring down at him is the last thing he sees as the air bison launches itself into the air.

Kuvira took the city but he can’t think of that night. He can’t. He can’t breathe when he thinks of that night. He can’t.

Leaving Kuvira’s outpost on Juicy was the last time he would see Grandma alive. He couldn’t speak, could hardly breathe, couldn’t move. His aunt came to sit next to him, her voice gentle. She smoothed his hair back from his face, wrapped him in someone’s coat and started speaking to him, asking him simple questions like _what is your favorite color_ and _do you like sugar in your tea_ , nothing that took too much effort for him to answer. She was patient, so patient, never minding when he couldn’t answer some of the questions. Grandma was sitting next to him and finally said _what are you doing Lin_ and his aunt said _he_ _’s in shock, I’ve seen it before, Su said she had him isolated for hours, spirits know what she did to him_ and Grandma was quiet for a long time and then she said _I should have killed that girl_ and his aunt said _you probably should have_ and Huan started to shake again and then Grandma took his hand and said _you_ _’re safe now Huan_ but was he? Was he really?

Sometimes he still dreamed about that night.

He wouldn’t know at the time that the slight man with the terrible singing voice that led them through the train tunnels underneath Republic City would become a friend, possibly the best friend he might ever have. He just knew he didn’t want to hear that awful warbling. Huan had never seen anyone who could laugh and smile the way the prince did, even though he must have been frightened, they were all frightened. The prince managed to keep everyone’s spirits up. He wished his grandmother had been around to sense him riding the badgermole, though. Grandma would have gotten a kick out of that.

At the wedding of the people he didn’t know (and didn’t want to go to) little Ikki grabbed his hands and danced him out of his seat. He froze up; he didn’t know anyone there and the music was all wrong and her hands were clutching at his wrists and his feet were great lumps of rock. Later, Opal told him that he had probably hurt the girl’s feelings and he felt terrible. He hadn’t meant to hurt the little bird. He asked Opal if he should send a letter and apologize but Opal told him it was okay, that she knew Ikki well enough to know that she would have just shook it off. But he still felt bad. That joyful little bird, all of the spirit animals she had drawn around herself, the little sugar glider that had attached itself to her. What must it be like to be her? To never feel the weight of everything the way he did?

Little bird, little bird. She laughs when he calls her that now and her fingers make shadow birds on the walls of the cavern where they sleep. Oh, his little bird. She soars.

She soars.

Kuvira destroyed his atelier. All of his work, destroyed. He is not surprised, no, but he is still heartbroken. The citizens of Zaofu go about rebuilding the city, but he knows better. It’s been tainted, shattered like glass. Huan knows what happens when you try to repair something that’s been smashed. No matter how well you smooth out the repairs, irrevocable change has happened. It can never go back to what it was. That’s why he asks if he can go with his parents to Ba Sing Se to discuss what will become of Zaofu with the terrible singer of a prince. Not because he wants to discuss it. But because he feels like he will suffocate if he cannot leave all of the sadness there. And they arrive in the city to find Wu, bloodless and faint, laying on the bed and his mother is on a tear, furious and shouting about a lack of security and his father is demanding to know why a waterhealer has not been called and Wu opens his eyes and his mouth is moving but no one else is paying attention and Huan must lean close in to hear him say _where_ _’s mako? please it hurts I want mako please_ and Huan remembers Mako, the tall firebender, and he does not know what to say, so he just puts his hand in Wu’s hand and says nothing at all, just holds his hand.

Why is he able to tell Wu about the things Kuvira did to him? To Junior? He’s not sure but maybe it is because Wu does not judge. He hasn’t grown up with all of them. He cries when Huan tells him about that night and when Huan asks him why he is crying he says it is because he feels so badly for Huan. Huan tells Wu that he himself has never cried and Wu nods knowingly, _sometimes_ _it hurts too much to cry_ and he tells Huan about his escape from Ba Sing Se, the Dai Li guard who tried to desert when Wu was being escorted to an airship who was killed by the general who was in charge, his head crushed like a melon, blood splattering all over Wu, how he had the man’s blood on his face in his long queue on his hands. _I_ _’ve never told anyone else about that_ Wu whispers and they sit together in the quiet of Huan’s atelier, Wu in his pushchair, bundled up in blankets, and he reaches out his hand and Huan takes it.

He gives Wu the painting of his mother, hoping he will understand that it is the thank you that he isn’t sure how to say. His gratitude for Wu’s bright smile, for his friendship, for his lack of judgment, for the fact that he simply accepts Huan as he is. Wu never mocks. Wu never cuts him off or dismisses him. Wu has an ability to laugh at himself, to laugh at the ridiculousness of life that Huan wishes he could have. Huan knows that he often says the wrong things - he usually doesn’t know what it is that he’s said wrong, but he is not stupid, he can see people reacting to his words - but Wu never seems to take offense. Slowly, Huan begins to relax with him.

As Wu plans his coronation he mentions that Ikki’s family will be coming and he remembers what Opal said. He asks Wu to help him learn the steps to a dance and Wu does not make fun, just shows him where to put his hands and feet. He thinks of her painting and the idea grows in his mind and he practices in secret; what he will do, what he will say. He wants to get it right.

He goes back with Wu to Ba Sing Se and there is Yumi, strong and bold and then Nuo so small and fierce and they are his friends as well. He has a hard time believing in this. He has never had friends before. They do not mind his oddness and this never stops surprising him. 

At the coronation he gives Ikki the bracelets, and he includes in them all of the things she painted of herself. He does not mean to make a scene. Her face, though, as she looks up at him, silver swirling around her wrists, makes all of the practice worth it.

He stays with Wu and travels to the Southeastern Provinces with him as well as Nuo and Yumi and they are given cactus juice there. Yumi doesn’t drink it but the other three of them do and it makes him feel so very strange and he lays down on the ground in the moonlight and he feels himself leaving his body and traveling down, down through the earth and he feels a faint awareness and he knows it is Grandma and he senses her dry amusement with him. Farther he goes and he is fascinated with this, fascinated with the idea that he can leave his body this way, that he can use his senses this way. He doesn’t like the cactus juice, though, it makes him feel out of control and leaves him with a nasty headache. He talks to Yumi about it and she shows him some meditation techniques. And he tries again. It takes some time to master, but Huan isn’t afraid of time. He will do it until it happens for him. That’s how he does everything.

He’s sad when Wu goes back to Republic City and Yumi follows. But Nuo comes to Zaofu and that makes him happy. He loves Nuo. Not the way he knows Wing loves her, not that way. But he is glad that he can go to Wing and Nuo’s little house and spend time there. Once he asks Wing if he minds that Huan is always around and Wing stares at him for a long time and Huan can’t tell what the expression on his face means. Is Wing angry? Disappointed? But then Wing puts his arms around Huan and says _I love you so much and so does Nuo, you have to know this, know that you always have a home with us, always_ and Huan is happy. So happy.

He works on his art and more of it sells and is exhibited even and Wei leaves for Republic City and he’s sad, yes, he’ll miss Wei, but it’s okay. He doesn’t like change. He’s never liked it. But he knows this is Wei’s dream, his laughing little brother, full of energy and fun. He can’t manage to go to the pro-bending arenas to watch him - it’s too much, far too much for him - but Wei understands. He listens to the games on the radio, even though the rules of the game are not interesting to him. He doesn’t bother to learn them. He smiles, however, whenever the man on the radio says Wei’s name. He doesn’t have to see Wei play to know what he looks like; that grin on his face, laughing when he does something well. Just like he always has.

Opal writes him letters and she visits often. She lives with the boy who made fun of his sculpture and traveled all over with Junior and Kuvira and Huan is very distrustful of him at first. But eventually even Huan can tell that Bolin is kind. Wu marries Bolin’s brother, the tall firebender he called for so piteously when he was stabbed. Mako. Mako is one of those people who looks angry but who usually is not, much like his Aunt Lin. Those kind of people often confuse him, but he takes his cue from Wu, who is easy to read, all of his feelings always clear on his face.

He is sleeping one night in Zaofu when he feels himself being tugged somewhere. He is awake but not awake, the way he is when he uses the earth to sense things. He’s pulled into a grove of pink trees, sparkling with rainbow flowers, spirits flitting about. The little bird is there, face lit up with joy. So this is the spirit world, then. Much like when he travels through the earth he cannot touch or feel anything; however, he can see and hear and take everything in. The little bird is chattering at him in her excitement and he smiles to see her. He does not know if he can get to this place on his own - after all, it is more an airbender place, he thinks, but he’s not sure - but he will try. It does not feel the same way that the earth connection feels; it is wilder, unpredictable, chaotic. Those are not feelings he likes. But the little bird seems so happy to see him, he does not mind coming to speak to her.

He paints a picture of the grove and Nuo sees it and asks what it is. He tells her all of it and she goes quiet for a long time. _Huan_ , she says, and he can tell by her voice she is serious, _you know Ikki is very young, yes?_ He is not sure why Nuo is saying this. He knows how old the little bird is. She is a child. _It_ _’s just that people may take it the wrong way_ Nuo says and he thinks about this for a time and then he understands what Nuo means and he starts to shake his head wildly and Nuo puts a hand on his arm _Huan I know you better than that, we all know you, but other people do not and they will think the wrong thing when a twenty-three year old man strikes up a friendship with a fourteen year old girl_ and this makes him so unhappy he feels that he wants to cry. _So I shouldn_ _’t go again_ he says and Nuo sits down and sighs and puts her arm around him _I think you should go if you like but I think you should keep it between you and Ikki, okay?_ He thinks about this and says _but that is lying isn_ _’t it_ and Nuo says _think of it as discretion instead_ and he knows what discretion means. _Can I tell Wu_ he asks and Nuo nods _but Wu only, okay_ and he understands.

Yuke is new to Zaofu, she is a metalbender, a dancer. She always seems to be where Huan is. She talks to him. She frequently laughs at what he says and he is never quite sure if she she really finds him that amusing or if she is mocking him like so many others have. He asks Nuo and Nuo tells him that she thinks Yuke wants to have a romantic relationship with him. _It_ _’s not really that surprising_ Nuo says _it_ _’s not like all of you Beifong boys aren’t handsome_ and he stares at her _am I handsome_ and Nuo laughs at him - but it is always friendly laughter with Nuo, Nuo would never mock him, this he knows - _oh Huan, yes, yes you are, very handsome indeed_ and he is not sure what to think of that. No one has ever told him he was handsome before.

He and Yuke go out on dates and this seems to please everyone, Mom and Dad included. He does not dislike Yuke, but she does not always interest him and she gets very angry when he forgets one of their dates because he is trying to finish a piece he is working on. She invites him to her home one night and she starts to take his clothes off and he understands what she wants and he is not sure if he wants it or not but he decides that he will try it, at least. She keeps tickling him and he doesn’t like that, it makes his skin crawl and he tries to tell her but she isn’t listening. He lays in her bed afterward and it isn’t a bad feeling - she didn’t force him or hurt him or anything like that - but he isn’t very impressed. She seems to enjoy it, however, so they continue with it and he does like the feeling after he comes, so there is that.

They date for a few months - he is very careful never to let the little bird pull him away when he is spending time with Yuke and he does not say anything to her about it, either, even he understands it would not be appropriate - and Yuke tells him one day that she would like him to move in with her. He doesn’t want to do that. He likes his home and his atelier is right there and in any case, he feels like trying to get along with Yuke is too much work. She doesn’t listen to him when he tries to explain things to her. He is not like he was when he was younger. He rarely loses control of his emotions any longer. Some of the things that he can’t help but do - when he can’t get the words out of his head, for example, or looking people in the eye - he realizes are excused by people because he is an artist. He has no idea what being an artist has to do with it but it makes him far less inconspicuous than when he was younger and he is grateful. He doesn’t like being the center of attention. He loathes it when people stare at him. Yuke didn't know him when he was younger, though, and he thinks that she does not understand that he is not the way he is because he is an artist. He is the way he is because he is Huan and he can only ever be Huan.

He tells Yuke he does not want to move in with her. She cries. She shouts. She pleads. He does not know what to say to any of it and he panics and just keeps repeating himself. She tells him that he is a terrible person, that he does not know how to love anyone, that he is a monster with no feelings at all, something broken and damaged and that there is something wrong with him, wrong with his brain, that he was a terrible selfish lover and he walks away, keeps walking until he walks home and into his room and he won’t come out, won’t eat, won’t speak across the world to the little bird who keeps tapping at his consciousness every night. Nuo and Wing come to see him and Nuo finally drags out of him what happened and then he hears Nuo outside his room in the hall, furious, shouting and stamping along, Wing saying _sweetie I know I am angry too but think of the baby_ and Nuo says _I will have that little bitch_ _’s head on a stake_ and  Mom comes and Dad too and all of them are talking right outside his room where he can hear them and he puts his pillow over his head and thinks _maybe I am a monster maybe I am maybe she_ _’s right I don’t know how to love anyone_ and finally they all go somewhere else, they go to shout and scream somewhere else.

He’s not sure how long he is in his room. He doesn’t want to do any art. He doesn’t want to eat, even, although Mom makes him eat a little. Wu comes, though, and he brings his new baby, the one Huan hasn’t seen yet. Wu talks to him and lets Huan cry on him and he puts Huan in the bath and talks to him and washes his hair and combs it and when it is dry braids it back and says _now don_ _’t you feel better_ and Huan does, a bit. Wu’s little girl is there as well and his driver, the not-boy not-girl Qi. Huan doesn’t understand why Qi is not a boy or a girl but he respects that Qi is Qi’s own person and also, he knows how it feels to be the outsider and he would not like Qi to feel like that, not from him. He is sitting in his atelier and it is late and everyone is asleep but Qi comes, smoking a cigarette, and sits with him for a time, saying nothing. _Reckon that woman stomped all over your heart_ Qi finally says and Huan nods. _If I believed everything everyone said about me I_ _’d just throw myself off a bridge and be done with it_ Qi says and smokes some more. _People say shit to me all the time and anyhow that woman ain_ _’t right for you, someday you’ll find a woman who is and it will be easy as breathing_. Huan thinks on this for awhile. _Have you found a woman right for you_ he asks and Qi sighs _don_ _’t run towards women myself and yeah, I have, but the man don’t love me back_ and Huan says _well then you don_ _’t follow your own advice do you_ and suddenly Qi grins at him _well who the fuck does that_ _’s what I’d like to know_ and that strikes Huan as funny and he laughs and Qi laughs with him and he doesn’t know why but this makes him feel like he wants to create something again and so he starts to bend and Qi just sits with him, quiet and peaceful, while the metal moves under his hands.

Later he gives the piece to Qi. It is just a small piece, metal twisting and flowing together in the shape of a circle but it is what came out of his hands when Qi said what Qi did.

Huan thinks maybe Qi is a friend to trust too.

Yuke leaves Zaofu soon after that. No one will say why but Huan isn’t stupid. He is sure Nuo has chased her off. He’s not sorry. He doesn’t want to see her again.

He finally meets the little bird in the spirit world again and she tells him she was worried and asks if all is well. He is quiet for a long time and finally says _someone hurt me and it took me some time to feel right again but I don_ _’t want to talk about it okay_ and she nods in that way she does, one quick bob down with her chin _sure it_ _’s okay I’m just glad you could come tonight_ and then she smiles that brilliant smile and things are okay. The little bird always just says what she feels or what she wants, she never makes Huan feel like he is walking across broken glass when he is with her.

He likes to talk to her. She is easy to talk to. If he doesn’t understand something he tells her and she explains it in a different way. If she doesn’t understand him then she comes right out and says so. They talk about his art and her studies and he tells her about the seismic sense he learned from his grandmother and how it works and it turns out that she has been doing something similar with her airbending and she shows him how she can use the air currents to sense other people or things at a distance. Different bending but same principles.

Nuo doesn’t have one but rather two babies. Girls. She and Wing are very busy with them and don’t have much time for Huan. He understands. He isn’t offended. He does miss their company, however, and it makes him understand how alone he is, how outside of the two of them he has no friends at all in Zaofu. He visits Republic City and he is so happy to see Wei and his aunt and Wu of course, but he knows he could never live in that city, it is too loud, too shrill, too busy, too much. He sees the little bird briefly with her family and her mother is watching him closely and he remembers what Nuo said and he does not behave around Ikki any differently than he does around her other siblings and finally her mother relaxes a little. Later that night they meet in the spirit world and he is unhappy and he says _Nuo tells me people will take it the wrong way_ and Ikki nods gravely and says _yes they would_ and that is when he realizes that the little bird is growing up.

She begins to talk of leaving, leaving her home her parents her beloved sister. She wants to travel, she wants to see the world, experience new things. He envies her this. She has her air bison and she’s so confident in herself, confident of her place in the world. He has never been like this.

 _Come with me_ she says one night as they sit in her rainbow grove and he stares at her for a long time. He wants to, but he is afraid. He knows how difficult travel can be and he says so. She promises him that she will take care of everything and he wants to, he wants to say yes, but he isn’t sure. But then he thinks to himself, _if I don_ _’t I will just stay here in Zaofu and rot_ and so he tells her that he will. He is frightened, but he will go. He will try. He knows that no matter what, he can always come back home.

She completes her mastery and they begin to tattoo her. He wants to show her some sort of companionship, some sort of solidarity, and so he asks their tattooed chef to show him how to do it and he inks the baby dragon bird spirit that she drew all those years ago - on the night that Kuvira took Zaofu - onto his forearm. He likes the look of it, there in his skin, something that will last forever, something permanent, something that won’t change. No. He _loves_ it.

She comes for him, one cool autumn morning, the blue of her tattoos gleaming. He has left a note for his family and he hopes they understand. He is afraid, but he knows that he can’t let fear rule him. He can’t. He has to go.

He loves the colors of the snow where they stay with her aunt in the south pole and the scorching heat of the volcanic island they visit in the Fire Nation. He does a sculpture for the Fire Lord and she tells him what she remembers of his grandmother and they speak of her father as well. He never does learn to like the spiciness of the Fire Nation’s food - it is too much for him - but he manages to eat something. He and the little bird go to visit the Fire Shamans and they offer to tattoo a lion turtle on his back. He is told this is a great honor, that the Fire Shamans do not make this offer to just anyone. He accepts and one day, as he is laying on his stomach, letting his mind drift to ease the pain, a tiny, ancient woman comes to peer at him. _So you_ _’re Toph Beifong’s grandson_ she says. _They_ _’re all gone, you know, I’m the only one left, well except for my ridiculous half-sister but who counts her anyhow._ She cackles and pokes him in the side _so I suppose you fancy yourself a bender then_ and he says _I don_ _’t know how to answer that_ and that seems to amuse her. _Aang_ _’s grandchild is around as well they tell me but I can’t be bothered, I’m due to die here any day you know_ and he squints at her for a moment and then says _are you happy about that or can_ _’t you be bothered_ and that gets another laugh out of her but then she leans forward and looks him in the eyes and normally he would look away, it is so difficult for him to make eye contact that way but he finds he can’t look away from her and she says to him with a voice that is low and rough _I have known you were coming since before you were born, I have waited for you to come, the lost child will need to find her way to the dragons, when the time comes you must give her the map_ and she starts to back away and he is very confused and says _but how will I know when the time comes_ and she says _when the dragon bird spirit bleeds_ and he has no idea what that is supposed to mean and then she crumples to the ground and several other fire shamans take her up and away and the shaman inking his back says _that is prophecy, sacred prophecy from the Shaman Azula, you must remember those words and tell no one, not even the Avatar_ _’s granddaughter, the map is here_ and she brushes her hand across the half-formed tattoo on his back and Huan is not at all sure how he feels about any of this but he promises he won’t tell anyone, not even the little bird.

He thinks about it, though. Often. He’s pretty sure he doesn’t want any part of anyone else’s prophecy and it makes him feel a little resentful but he keeps his promise and says nothing to anyone.

He knows the little bird is running off to have sex. He doesn’t mind. She’s not mean to him about it and she doesn’t seem to want to leave him, which is what he’s always a little afraid of. It’s always there, that little fear in the back of his mind that tells him he is a waste of time, that Ikki will find someone more suitable, someone that can keep her happy. She seems happy with him, though, and he loves to sit and talk with her, talk about the things they’ve seen and what lies ahead. He’s still not very good about thinking of the future, but she loves to talk about it and he loves to listen to her talk. Sometimes they bump heads; sometimes he needs his space and when this happens it is not obvious to her and he needs to communicate better with her, he knows this because she tells him so, hands on her hips, and he knows she is right. He tries to remember to tell her he needs some space. They learn each other; he’s shocked beyond reason at how loud she snores ( _airbender thing_ she assures him, giggling) and she can’t at first give credence to the fact that he really doesn’t know what day it is and furthermore does not care. She’s charming and outgoing and people are drawn to her, so she is the one talking to the villagers when they stop off for supplies. He is the one who does little repairs to various metal things that are worn and broken. He’s no engineer - not like Junior - but he can manage to patch things up. They end up trading a lot of his little repairs for places to sleep and things to eat.

They are at a Fire Nation village one night and there is a bonfire and dancing and a woman makes her attraction to him clear enough that even Huan can see it. He’s not interested, however. It’s not that he doesn’t have certain needs - he does, and he takes care of them in private, he’s not made of metal himself after all - but he has no desire to have sex with anyone at this point. He turns the woman down politely and thinks that’s the end of it but Ikki inexplicably seems to be angry with him, demands to know if he understands she is no longer a child. He doesn’t understand why she is asking. Of course he knows this; he would never have trusted his safety and well-being while traveling to a child. She is still his little bird, of course, but she’s flown the nest. She talks to him later about her having sex with others and he tells her quite honestly that she is an adult who can make her own decisions and he does not mind. This is all true, but it doesn’t seem to satisfy her and he isn’t sure why. She drops it, however, and so he gratefully drops it as well.

They keep traveling. Around the Fire Nation, stopping off in Republic City for a time (Ikki’s parents seem resigned to her traveling; her older sister, however, makes him feel very welcome indeed) and he gets to meet Wu’s new baby, the baby that Yumi gave to him. He is happy to see Opal and her little boys as well, and Wei sees him in the distance the first day they arrive and runs straight for him, whooping and laughing and swinging Huan around in a big circle and Huan can’t stop himself from grinning and grinning. He missed Wei as well. On to Zaofu and his mother is so happy to see them that she cries just a little. They travel about the Earth Kingdom then; exploring through caves and spending time with the sandbenders and the swampbenders as well. It is Ikki’s sister Jinora who comes to them in spirit form and tells them that Opal and Bolin are finally getting married and they make plans to go back to Zaofu for the wedding. Before they do, however, Ikki sends a message to the Fire Nation. _I have a dress there, the fire princess promised to send it to me if I needed it_ she tells him and he nods. He does not have anything to wear for a wedding - Ikki mostly wears her wingsuits while traveling and his clothes are comfortable but worn and certainly not formal - so he sends a message to Wu as well and Wu as always obliges by bringing him a suit and giving it to him when they all arrive.

He is happy to see everyone there but does not know what to do when his mother puts Ikki and himself into his old bedroom, sharing the same bed. Even he is not so dense that he doesn't realize what she is assuming. Nuo immediately tells him she will have Ikki moved to another room but he thinks that will be even more embarrassing and far more uncomfortable to deal with. Besides, he and Ikki share a tent quite frequently. It isn’t really much different than that.

He was wrong. It is very different than sharing a tent. At one point during the first night they are there Ikki rolls over and starts to snore in his ear. She has done this before - albeit in her own bedroll - and Huan knows just to roll her over in the other direction. He tries to do this and she murmurs in her sleep and wraps her body closer to him, her leg sliding up and over his leg. He freezes. He is not sure why, but this does not make him think about how loud Ikki is any longer. Instead he finds himself thinking about the weight of her leg on his leg and his hand creeps down on its own volition to feel her bare thigh across his. His face burns and he pulls his hand away and rolls over, effectively knocking her off of him.

It takes him a long time to get to sleep that night. All of the old feelings he had - worrying that Ikki would no longer want to travel with him if he did something wrong, worrying that she would find a lover she liked better than Huan and would leave him, worrying that his companionship was not enough for her - all of these worries came slamming back into his head and pushing down on his chest and made him feel like weeping. Why were these feelings coming back? He’d tried so hard to put them behind himself.

It is worse on the day of the wedding itself. She is wearing a dress, a beautiful dress, and makes her look like someone else, someone who is and is not his little bird and it makes him feel hot all over, hot and disturbed and agitated. He’s never felt like this before and he doesn’t know what this feeling means and he is confused and wants nothing more than to just walk away, but he knows he will hurt Opal’s feelings if he does so, so he stays and he can’t stop staring at the dress, at the way it curves over Ikki’s hips and breasts, the amount of her back that it shows. He can’t understand it! He has seen Ikki nude before! Why does this feel differently?

He wants to talk to someone about it but Wu is busy and Nuo is busy and Yumi has run off with Ikki’s aunt (something that Ikki finds very amusing for some reason) and he can’t ask Ikki, of course, and he doesn’t know what to do. He’s walking down by Wei and Wing’s old power disc court and Wei is there as well. Alone, for once. He sees Huan and frowns and says _what_ _’s the matter with you_ and Huan takes a deep breath and tells him and Wei starts to laugh but then stops and apologizes when he sees Huan’s look. _I_ _’m sorry_ he says, _I thought you were joking but clearly not, please forgive me_ and Huan does and Wei says _that feeling, don_ _’t you know what that is, it’s desire, you are feeling desire_ and Huan isn’t happy to hear it and he says _well I don_ _’t want it_ and Wei puts an arm around his shoulders and says _it doesn_ _’t work that way, you don’t get to choose your feelings just your actions trust me if anyone knows I know_ and they sit together for awhile. _You haven_ _’t slept with anyone except that Yuke woman right_ Wei asks and Huan shakes his head and Wei sighs _look big brother, sex, it should feel good and it should be fun and it should make you feel like flying and if it doesn_ _’t then you aren’t having sex with the right person_ and Huan says _you like sex a lot don_ _’t you_ and Wei grins and says _I love it and for lots of reasons but I_ _’m me and you’re you and I think maybe for you sex would be good if it was with someone you loved and I don’t think you loved Yuke right_ and Huan shakes his head again and Wei says _but it_ _’s clear you love Ikki so I think and this is just my opinion so feel free to ignore me but if the opportunity presents itself with your girl there that you might find sex is a whole lot better for you because of that_ and Huan thinks about this and says _but what if it goes wrong and she leaves me_ and Wei tilts his head to one side and says _well, it could happen I guess but based on that dress I_ _’d say she was feeling kind of hopeful herself_ and Huan isn’t sure about that but he loves Wei for listening and not making fun of him.

He didn’t know what to do about it. They left Zaofu and made their way slowly up north; Ikki had gotten it into her head that she wanted to see what was left of the Northern Air Temple again and he didn’t mind. It didn’t give him much of a chance to do any sculpting - they weren’t staying anywhere long enough for that - but he did a lot of sketching. He felt so comfortable with her air bison by this time that he could use the reins to fly Blue himself. For some reason when he was flying Blue he didn’t have nearly as much trouble with motion sickness and Ikki was happy to let him take the reins as long as he wanted. He’d sit on Blue’s neck in the heat of the summer, dressed in a pair of old patched trousers, letting his toes dig into her fur, hair braided back, eyes half-lidded against the sun, listening to his little bird’s chatter from the saddle.

He thought about what Wei said as they slowly flew; was he in love with Ikki? He loved her, he knew that much, like he loved his parents and his siblings and his friends. He’d known that for a long time. Yuke was wrong when she said he didn’t know how to love anyone. He knew. He might love in his own way, but he loved. He was comfortable with that feeling. It was all of this desire that turned him upside down, confused him, made him long for the early days where they were just friends and it was simple. He liked simple, he needed simple and things felt so complicated now.

His little bird, with those clear gray eyes and the funny little cowlick that she battles with in the front of her bangs, the way she tilts her head back when she laughs and how the breeze picks up around her when she feels passionately about something. She is so free.

He noticed everything now, things he had never noticed before. The way her wingsuit molded so closely to her body. The wingsuit tended to get hot and during the warm seasons when they were alone Ikki had always shoved hers down and tied it around her waist, wearing a brassiere she’d cobbled together herself. She had a smattering of very pale freckles across her collarbone and the tops of her breasts and he found himself staring at them. He wanted to touch them. He wanted to touch them very badly.

He threw himself into work. To distract himself he was trying to bend sand into glass - something his grandmother had declared impossible but Grandma had proved the impossible with metalbending so who knew? Sand was tricky to bend and so he had to concentrate on it completely and that helped. Somewhat.

They arrive at the Northern Air Temple and he understands, for the first time, why Ikki wanted to come. It is beautiful there, so clear and cold and silent. It’s not difficult to look at the ruin of the mountain and imagine it unfolding itself into something new. He’s no architect, though, he knows this, so he sends drawings to his father and asks him what he thinks.

He makes a small cave of rock for the two of them to stay warm in and they put their bedrolls together and she is sleeping right next to him, like she did in his childhood bed in Zaofu and it’s worse, far worse now, he wants to touch her and he gets angry with himself, angry that he can’t just get past this, that he can’t bury himself into his work and forget it. He doesn’t want these feelings. They are not comfortable. They are not peaceful. They are certainly not civil. It is not civil to think of the things he is thinking of his little bird and one day he plunges his body into the icy water coming down the side of the mountain, screaming involuntarily in shock, trying to make himself go back to normal. He is so afraid that if he reaches out to her she will be horrified at the idea, at the very idea of somehow changing their relationship and that she will reject him completely and he can’t bear it. He just can’t. He’s so happy with her, she understands him and cares for him and he loves her and he can’t give her up. He puts a bolster of a rolled up blanket in between them and keeps as far away from her as he can.

He’s delighted when his parents come, though. His father is happier than Huan has seen him in years, since before Opal flew away and Junior left. His mother is happy as well, fearlessly bending into the mountain. Ikki flits between them all, laughing at her own failed attempts to bake bread, gladly drinking fresh tea with his mother. One night when his parents retire back to their airship Ikki comes to him and she tells him that she wants to have sex with him and he freezes, does not know what to say, his mind starts spinning and he knows if he tries to speak, to answer her, he will make no sense at all. So instead, he does what he does best; he draws on her, trying to show her with pictures all the things that are in his head his heart his hands. And because she is Ikki, because she is his little bird, she understands what he can’t say to her. He covers her with ink and when he finally touches her bare breast he remembers what his brother told him, how he said it would be different with someone he loved and he loves her and this desire, the new thing she makes him feel, it makes him lose control and he’s so lost in her but this is Ikki, she won’t let him slip through her fingers, she won’t let him fall. He kisses her and touches her everywhere, his sculptor’s fingers so sensitive to how her body moves under him and he feels the wind rising about them and that’s how he knows she is feeling it too, she can never keep her bending under tight control when she’s passionate and she looks at him with those eyes, those great gray eyes, and at the last moment he remembers and he manages to gasp out _baby_ and she knows what he means, she knows he is not calling her a pet name and says _I have it covered it_ _’s okay come inside me now_ and he does and it’s nothing nothing nothing like it ever was before. Nothing at all. It feels like everything in his world his entire life shifted itself over and something new is coming. He’s not sure what that is yet but for once he is not afraid of the unknown.

Afterward he dozes but he wakes to find she is not there and his heart starts to pound but he puts his hand to the rock below and feels for her and there she is, standing on the ledge and he welcomes her back into the bed and she laughs her laugh and puts her icy feet on him and then she’s kissing him again and he says _is it okay_ and she takes his face in her hands in the darkness and says _yes, yes it is okay, it_ _’s everything I wanted and I’m so happy_ and then he pulls her close and tries not to tremble.

He sleeps that night and he dreams of his brother, of Junior, hollow-eyed and angry, bitter and defeated. _I_ _’ll fix it_ he thinks in the dream or perhaps he is awake, he’s not sure, but it is dark and warm in the little cave with Ikki curled up next to him, her snores echoing, this precious thing that gives herself to him. _Fly, little bird_ he whispers into her ear and she buries her head into his shoulder in her sleep.

He is happy.


End file.
